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Installing a Husband - 8/31/2008 1:44:22 AM   
califsue


Posts: 593
Joined: 2/2/2008
Status: offline 		        Dear Tech Support,

       Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
       distinct slow down in overall system performance -- particularly in the flower and
       jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

       In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
       Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable
       programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1.

       Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the
       system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

       What can I do?

       Signed, Desperate


       Dear Desperate:

       First, keep in mind Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband
       1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: 'I Thought You Loved
       Me.exe' and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget toinstall the Guilt  3.0 update.

       If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically
       run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

       But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to
       default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a
       very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

       Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the
       background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).

       Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are
       unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

       In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited 
       memory and not learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying
       additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food 3.0
       and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

       Good Luck, Tech Support
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Installing a Husband - 8/31/2008 4:48:39 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		LMAO!!   

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Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to califsue)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Installing a Husband - 8/31/2008 7:39:26 AM   
Zenonis


Posts: 25
Joined: 1/29/2006
Status: offline 		LOL.. had seen the version where a man had called support after upgrading from girlfriend to wife. This a good one.  

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Installing a Husband - 8/31/2008 8:16:13 AM   
spinninsweetness


Posts: 477
Joined: 3/6/2008
From: London
Status: offline 		Funny!

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Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Installing a Husband - 8/31/2008 3:30:23 PM   
Steponme73


Posts: 552
Joined: 11/9/2007
Status: offline 		Oh, yes...LMAO  this is good!

(in reply to spinninsweetness)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/1/2008 1:33:38 AM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Too true! 

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"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to califsue)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/1/2008 8:05:29 PM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline

Poenkitten

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/1/2008 8:13:03 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		Have you heard of the package
Shake the Sugar Tree 5.0 ?
It usually reactivates the romance software.

_____________________________

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Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to BlackPhx)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/2/2008 2:25:46 PM   
lilmissdefiant


Posts: 666
Joined: 4/17/2008
Status: offline 		if all else fails install "Divorce threat 2.8" the desired effect should make the Boyfriend applications kick back in for a while.

_____________________________

Change what you can and accept what you can't.
He came to me one night. Explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed! When satisfied, he left & I was hurt!!... Fu*king mosquito!

Resident Thread Killer

(in reply to lusciouslips19)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/2/2008 4:31:28 PM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline

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TECHNO-DOLT
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GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)


(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/2/2008 6:01:38 PM   
Thadius


Posts: 5091
Joined: 10/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lilmissdefiant

if all else fails install "Divorce threat 2.8" the desired effect should make the Boyfriend applications kick back in for a while.


This could be seen as trying to reverse engineer the program, and would probably void the end user license agreement.

_____________________________

When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends." ~ Japanese Proverb

(in reply to lilmissdefiant)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/2/2008 6:29:57 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		Orrrr, it could lead to, Boyfriend 6.0 and Increased Bank Account 10.0

or........cement shoes 1.0

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Thadius)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/3/2008 4:53:00 AM   
angelbluewingsz


Posts: 324
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline 		ya know... the updated version of 3sum 3000 usually works for me... hmmm

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/4/2008 10:50:57 AM   
HypnoticDan


Posts: 463
Joined: 5/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance -- particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.  In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1.  Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?
Signed, Desperate


Dear Desperate,

I've upgraded your problem ticket, sent it to the admins, and their response was "why did you try to fix something that wasn't broken?"  If you look at the list of available features in Husband 1.0 and Boyfriend 0.5 you can clearly see that Boyfriend 0.5 has a more complete feature set.  Granted, Boyfriend 0.5 requires more work on your part to keep it doing what you want but on the whole it has a more friendly, intuitive interface.  Husband was written back in the days when Bill Gates said that no one would need more than 640k of RAM and it's design has been crippled ever since.  (Note the total lack of documentation!)

Unfortunately due to license restrictions you cannot downgrade from Husband back to Boyfriend.  Your only viable option is to get another copy of Boyfriend.  Whether you choose to keep Husband at that point is up to you.  Be aware that trying to keep the two from stepping into each other's address space, corrupting memory, and causing a crash is a very delicate balancing act.  Some have had success with the unsupported "Cuck 0.1.d" patch.  We at tech support cannot recommend it at this time as it violates the TOS.

Sincerely,
Tech Support.

(in reply to angelbluewingsz)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/4/2008 2:54:35 PM   
auroraborealis


Posts: 509
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline 		*chuckles* Very very cute!

Aurora

_____________________________

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Head of the Valkyrie Brigade!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DsP2TheK0iQ

(in reply to HypnoticDan)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Installing a Husband - 9/4/2008 4:29:34 PM   
Dikini


Posts: 10
Joined: 9/4/2008
Status: offline 		lol cute

(in reply to auroraborealis)
Profile   Post #: 16
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