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Bloopers - 9/14/2008 2:56:43 AM

Posts: 606
Joined: 4/15/2008
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What are some of the bloopers during play with your Dom/sub? I'm sure there must be a few, e.g. breaking ropes, untimely farts, missed targets etc. Like those NG scenes at the end of Jackie Chan movies.

I keep coming up with funny questions lately...

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Silence! I keel you!

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 5:33:10 AM

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Joined: 7/25/2008
From: point A
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First time he tried to throw a singletail, he caught his ear, I laughed so hard I peed. It went downhill for me that night....

(in reply to zakkan)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 6:18:52 AM

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Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline

The day I first met my Master in person was a day full of them. First, I got lost. My cell phone wasn't working properly and I had to find a public pay phone - something much more difficult than it used to be. I stood outside being whipped by the wind and rain as I called him at the restaurant to explain that I was lost, and he said he'd wait.

I got there 40 minutes late (and I HATE being late for anything) and he was on the phone and couldn't get off right away. He told me to order something, so I did but felt very awkward - and still windblown and wet. He got off the phone, we had a nice meal, and I got up to use the bathroom. I had on a button down dress and I knew that the mother of pearl buttons had a tendency to slip so I double checked them in the mirror, then went back to where we were sitting. We were sitting on bar stools at the restaurant and I climbed up on mine, and then noticed my Master's finger going towards my chest. I thought it was a little forward, but imagine my embarrassment when he tugged on the fabric and said, "you don't have to undress yet". The top button had stayed buttoned but the next three down had come undone exposing my bra and belly!

By this time I am sure in my mind that I appear to be such an incredible clutz that he will have nothing to do with me, but he invited me to go with him to a hotel and I felt very comfortable with him, so I did. Things were progressing very well, and then my necklace got caught in the bedspread and I couldn't get free - butt in air, face down, and stuck! I had to ask for his help to get free, and thankfully he had a good sense of humor.

I figured it was a pretty disastrous first impression, but he appreciated that I was thoughtful enough to call when I was late, enjoyed the unintentional peep show at the restaurant, and enjoyed that he could "come to my rescue" when I got my necklace caught. I think that the bloopers actually ended up being little helpers - how does someone handle it when things go wrong - and I ended up making a very favorable impression. : )

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(in reply to PrincessJ77)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 6:22:55 AM

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Joined: 3/27/2007
From: virginia
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I was meeting a girl I had talked with a few times on here. we had a nice conversation over coffee. Then she proceeded to run over my bike in the parking lot.

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I'm the happy fascist slut.
awwwwwww yeeeeeeeeah
And I see your schwartz is as big as mine.
My heart 10-01-72 / 10-16-09

(in reply to chamberqueen)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 8:01:02 AM

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Joined: 1/4/2007
From: Silicon Valley, San Jose, California
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Once had a nice willing submissive with a huge dildo in her ass, all restrained, I picked her up, and dropped her on the bed ... ooops.... I forgot about the dildo. Luckily she squirmed just enough not to do damage ... but ... well ... it took her a while to regain my trust ... understandably.

(in reply to scifi1133)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 9:14:01 AM

Posts: 1073
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I was on a "date" with a dom, and thot the potential he'd ask me to stay the night. We met half way at a family resturant. As I was walking quickly to my car to get my small bag, my skirt fell to the ground. I was wearing a thong. Children and parents were getting into their cars.

Over time Sir's sight crept into blind in one eye and partial vision in the other before he could have surgery. He could see very close up, but not 18 inches in front of him. On many occasions he tried to bury his cock into his own made hole instead of my ass. It took me a few times before I realized it was his sight and slipped my hand around to give him help. We laugh about it now.

About 5 years ago I traveled south to play with a dom who had built a breast bondage device just for me. He said it was the perfect opportunity for him to finally build one.
My boobs are different sizes and he broke out in a sweat trying to make his new toy work on the disparity in size.

(in reply to zakkan)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 9:20:53 AM

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Joined: 9/28/2007
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Last week during a "playdate" when the paddle He made for me split in half and broke on my backside.

Then getting thoroughly thrashed with a crop and cane because it was my fault!!

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Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values. Dalai Lama

(in reply to zakkan)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 1:15:49 PM

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Joined: 6/29/2005
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I had my sub blindfolded and kneeling with his hands tied behind his back. I then ordered him to get on his hands and knees...

Just a bit difficult!

LadyJulieAnn

(in reply to sblady)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 1:25:39 PM

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Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
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One time dureing sex doggy style he pulled out and rammed back really hard, not realizing that in pulling back his dick had slipped out and would now ram me really hard against the outer anus ring. It hurt a lot and kind of took the wind out of the play sails for a while.

And just most recently he was flogging me with a home made flogger out of silky rope that had started to unravel, so it'd be like horse hair, and he somehow managed to hit the top of my pussy with it, and it really freaking hurt, and in a so not sexy way. Then he went from flogging me to spanking me with no warning, One swat, not even as hard as it could of been and again it hurt in a non sexy way, since he has huge hands and his spankings hurt even when expecting one , and there was no warning of coming impact. I immediatly collapsed( I'd been on all fours) in tears an started howling owwwwwwwwwwww daddy that hurt that wasn't fun, * tears tend to be my responce to swift unexpected unwelcome pain*which again kind of took the wind out of the sex play sails, cause my distress kind of made his hardon go down.

< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 9/14/2008 1:28:00 PM >

(in reply to LadyJulieAnn)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 1:55:30 PM

Posts: 10
Joined: 8/11/2006
From: Alaska
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I was trying to deep throat him recently as in one of our fantasies... Good thing there was towel handy because I nearly lost lunch all over him. Guess I need more practice.

But he just wiped it up and didn't even whine about not being able to finish till I was out of bondage and offering to help again. Thankfully he and I have a good sense of humor and were able to laugh about a really TERRIBLE scene right away instead of doing the awkward, uncomfortable silence thing for a few days. ^_^ Knew there was a reason married that man!

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Yeeeeehhaaaaa!

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 5:55:46 PM

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Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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He had me tied, still dressed, with hands behind back and rope over one of the posts in the post and frame construction. My panties were on top of the garter and stockings and I was in high heels. Really thin heels. He slipped the panties down and told me to pick up one foot. Being the great klutz I am, and that these shoes give little support, I fell. The rope yanked the wrist and the arm took quite a while to recover.

I've told him next time he does this either he cuts off the clothes or I'm barefoot. Or both!

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Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to bellicose)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 7:51:04 PM

Posts: 52
Joined: 1/5/2008
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So last night I was told to strip, and "assume the position" with toys "x", "y", and "z" in appropriate places, and that I'd better be finished by the time he came back. He then went down stairs for a smoke. I did as was told... and waited.... and waited... and waited... and started to watch the clock... thoughts running through my mind, "is this some kind of a mind game?" "how long can one smoke really take?" "did something go wrong?"

Finally I got dressed and walked downstairs... to find him sitting on the porch, locked out.

::giggles::

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Emlykate

~~~~ Insert Something Witty, Profound or Insightful Here ~~~~

(in reply to zakkan)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 8:05:56 PM

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Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline

Hahaha-

1) Hardwood floors and thighhigh boots... He slapped my thigh, and I slipped into a perfect split. My body does not WANT splits... EVER! That resulted in lots of hot water bottles and tylenol... and a bit of jager.

2) There was the time where his dog took off with a dildo... the dog thought it was great fun and we had to chase that bastard around for 10 minutes... BAD DOG

3) My first suspension was spectacularly horribly done- and I passed out... hehehe the dom nearly peed himself I think.

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HBIC

(in reply to EmlyKate)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 8:15:17 PM

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Joined: 2/2/2008
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This is toooooooo funny...Thanks for sharing...

quote:

ORIGINAL: EmlyKate

So last night I was told to strip, and "assume the position" with toys "x", "y", and "z" in appropriate places, and that I'd better be finished by the time he came back. He then went down stairs for a smoke. I did as was told... and waited.... and waited... and waited... and started to watch the clock... thoughts running through my mind, "is this some kind of a mind game?" "how long can one smoke really take?" "did something go wrong?"

Finally I got dressed and walked downstairs... to find him sitting on the porch, locked out.

::giggles::

(in reply to EmlyKate)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 8:54:51 PM

MissDiandSirHugh

Posts: 1158
Joined: 8/11/2005
From: Goondiwindi ( Qld )
Status: offline

We were useing a very old razor strop on a submissive pain slut and during the use of it the stitching decided that after 100 years it was time to let go and the strop all came apart so it was decided to grab the closest thing to punish him even more for makeing this happen so grabbed the cat scratcher those sort you hang over the back of a chair with rope wound around it and as soon as it hit his arse it to broke.
This put Us all in such great fits of laughter We just had to give up and accept that best to use a cane once the laughter had subsided.

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HoRoo for now from Us both and enjoy all you read even if you don"t agree with us or others.
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(in reply to califsue)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 9:19:55 PM

Dominatebynature

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Joined: 9/13/2008
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I was playing with my last girl and while she was on top we decided to use a very small whip. (this was over 3 years ago and it was our first time) I hit her on her ass a couple of times and she asked me to hit her harder. So I pulled back and swung with as much force as I could... and I missed. I hit myself right in the balls. After I was done picking myself up off the floor and we stopped laughing about it, we decided that wasn't the best position to try any kind of whip, not matter how small.

(in reply to MissDiandSirHugh)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 9:30:55 PM

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Joined: 4/21/2008
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This is especially for all the women here who have gotten the e-mail from that guy who has the fantasy about the marble egg - let's just say, never stick anything in any hole that doesn't have a handle on it. I will not say WHO had to go to the demure Chinese ObGyn to have WHAT removed.

In a particularly vigorous CBT session I put my thumbnail through the poor boy's scrotum. That was one fun trip to the ER. Every time a nurse or doc came in we had to explain the injury all over again. We could hardly say it with a straight face. We laughed so much.

(in reply to Dominatebynature)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 9:39:57 PM

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Joined: 10/28/2007
Status: offline

After my first time being chained to the hooks in his ceiling and beaten by my now-ex, the angry music he had on ended and this happy little German band came on. Having been released from the chains, but still with my restraint cuffs on, both of us naked, we ended up dancing around and grinning like idiots for the next five minutes.

(in reply to zakkan)

RE: Bloopers - 9/14/2008 11:29:16 PM

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Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline

dang....*L*....scene: tied up - eager to play. Didn't have ben-wa balls, but rt thought marbles would do the trick. We played - it was very nice...then - time to get the marbles out.

Ok....i can't - what the hell...slight panic attack - i am SO not going to the ER!!! Quite a few minutes later - after several giggle fits - rt gets a t-spoon - and simply scoops them out....*L*...vaccuum...sucks (all kinds of pun intended). We finallygot the ben-wa balls - with the rope, too...and also the very heavy set that lets gravity help..*L*..

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.Forgiveness is the fragrance a flower leaves in the air after being crushed underfoot.

(in reply to faithbunny)

RE: Bloopers - 9/15/2008 12:36:06 AM

Posts: 90
Joined: 11/13/2007
Status: offline

i wish this was a funny blooper but it still pisses me off till this day. i didn't know what came over me to let this near stranger dom (with a purposeful lower case D, mind you) tie me up with rope, supposedly great in rope bondage, but i trusted the person that trusts this dom.

anyway, what happened was i wanted to do something special for this person i trusted, so i decided what could be more special than to get naked (for the first time ever in public!) in a familiar dungeon and get tied in bondage with another submissive male (that, at the time, belonged to that person) by the stranger dom. i don't know what the hell went wrong or how he tied us up but everytime the submissive male hunched over (due to a smack or a whip), it'd push down on my shoulders and hurt me like hell. and everytime he stood up straight it'd hurt his back, not to mention pulled me up in a very hurtful way. ugh, never again will i trust a person that me, myself, did not personal trust first!

(in reply to faithbunny)

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