To approach or not approach.....

To approach or not approach..... (Full Version)

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knowshisplace09 -> To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 5:32:44 PM)
question to all the wonderful Dommes out there....as a sub or slave....is it our duty to approach You with what we have to offer...or wait until one of You approaches us? thank You!!

softpjOS -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 5:44:35 PM)
there is no hard and fast rule to anything, including who makes the initial contact on here. Best bet is to read the Dommes full profile and if you meet what She is seeking, send a well thought out letter introducing yourself and outlining the interests you both share. And that doesn't mean going into full detail about.. since She is interested in CBT, giving Her your "ideal" scene for that particular interest. Many clues can be found within the profile of the person you are considering contacting. Remember, Dominant Women are real people, with real life interests and their lives dont revolve around BDSM and scenes. Well, not in the fantasy way.....

Usako -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 5:49:32 PM)
It's your duty to do what you want. I've read about plenty of lazy dommes who think the sub should message them, BS. BOTH parties should be responsible for sending messages. If she doesn't feel like sending a message or you don't don't feel like sending a message then how the hell will people meet? Just need to take a chance and message when you feel like it and the women need to message when they feel like it. I, personally, find it annoying to get messaged with "what someone has to offer." I'd rather someone be polite and say hello and talk to me first before throwing their kink on the table. I hate the messages where guys go on and on about their kinks and their fetishes and how I am some goddess they want to worship. Agh

MsStarlett -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 6:24:56 PM)
If you want to get noticed, you're going to have to send some messages. Gird your loans for a lot of rejection, but don't let it get you down. Check out a Dommes Vanilla interests! You'll be more likely to get farther talking about those in the beginning. Also, instead of just saying "I wish to serve you any way you wish" THINK of something NON-SEXUAL that you can do that is a valuable service! If you are close enough, can you fix the car? Get the viruses off her computer? Do you give great therapeutic massages - not just clumsy back rubs? Can you wash, color, brush or curl her hair? Lace a corset? Anything that is different from what every other sub is offering? Every single sub in the world thinks they are the absolute best toe kisser and ass licker. You better be more original if you want to stand out in the crowd.

hereyesruponyou -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 7:06:00 PM)
I am on the other side. I do like to hear what someone has to offer, it's usually the first question i ask a sub who contacts me. But echoing Ms. Starlett, don't just repeat what's on your profile and be interesting. Make it obvious you read my profile before messaging me. Whatever you do don't say you'll do anything, i have been known to suggest some ... shall we say "final" tasks

LadyHibiscus -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 7:12:08 PM)
If men did not approach us endlessly, how could we fill the air with our rants about trolling emails! [:D] Of course you should feel free to approach a dominant. Be courteous, spell her name correctly, and say something about yourself that makes you unique. Read her profile first, though. If she has an age limit that you don't match, or your favourite kink is her most hated, you might want to pass that lady by.

MaamJay -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 7:19:59 PM)
I appreciate messages from subs who HAVE read My profile and demonstrated that within their message. Don't give Me a list of things you want Me to do to you. Don't tell Me you would do anything for Me ... you don't even know Me from a bar of soap! That simply cheapens Me. Also don't just write "Hello Mistress" ... that leaves Me absolutely nowhere to go. A suitable start would be: Hello Ma'am. i am a sub male living in X in Australia and i would be willing to relocate for the right Dominant. i noticed in Your profile that You are looking for a 24/7 lifestyle sub and this is what i aspire to be with the right person. i also see You have a Master and i am ok with the idea of a male being head of the household as long as You would be in control of me. i would appreciate it if You might check out my profile and perhaps we could chat more and get to know each other. Looking forward to hearing from You. sub y OR Hello Ma'am, i have a question if You don't mind. How does it work for You being both sub to Your Master and Dominant over a sub? i don't have a picture in my head of how that would flow on a daily basis. i am interested in Your reply. Regards sub y In other words, show manners, don't be too grovelly, use greetings and a signature. It's not rocket science! Maam Jay aka violet[A]

chiaThePet -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 7:20:05 PM)
Whatever you should choose to do, just don't forget the pie. chia* (the pet)

MsStarlett -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 7:58:15 PM)
Pie? Carmel nut apple by any chance? Served hot with French vanilla ice cream? drool

undergroundsea -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/14/2008 8:06:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus Be courteous, spell her name correctly And don't get the addressee mixed up with someone else because that can be embarrassing ;-) Yes, it happened! Aw C'mon, I have a perfectly good explanation for why it happened! Cheers, Sea

thetammyjo -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/15/2008 7:26:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: knowshisplace09 question to all the wonderful Dommes out there....as a sub or slave....is it our duty to approach You with what we have to offer...or wait until one of You approaches us? thank You!! The answer depends entirely on what is said in the person's profile. Nothing more, nothing less. Not reading someone's profile and doing what it requests is a sure why to get no reaction or a negative reaction.

LadyJulieAnn -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/15/2008 8:44:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thetammyjo quote: ORIGINAL: knowshisplace09 question to all the wonderful Dommes out there....as a sub or slave....is it our duty to approach You with what we have to offer...or wait until one of You approaches us? thank You!! The answer depends entirely on what is said in the person's profile. Nothing more, nothing less. Not reading someone's profile and doing what it requests is a sure why to get no reaction or a negative reaction. Yes, indeed. There is nothing I dislike more than a generic email that is clearly cut and pasted and sent to every Domme profile, without regard to the person. LasyJulieAnn

LadyHibiscus -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/15/2008 9:42:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: undergroundsea quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus Be courteous, spell her name correctly And don't get the addressee mixed up with someone else because that can be embarrassing ;-) Yes, it happened! Aw C'mon, I have a perfectly good explanation for why it happened! Cheers, Sea No kidding! Some man wrote to say that he was running late but would still make the dinner date... luckily I was online so I could tell him that um... I was free for dinner, but probably NOT the person he was intending to write!

LadyPact -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/15/2008 1:33:00 PM)
I know other people have said this, but it really depends on the people involved. The biggest contributing factor is reading the profile of the person you intend to contact. If you don't fit what is listed there, there's nothing wrong with moving on to the next one. I'm not saying profile reading is a requirement if you are just dropping a friendly hello or want to comment on something that someone said on the boards that you particularly liked, but I can promise you that I'm more receptive if someone initiates contact because of something I've actually said. The quickest way for Me to lean towards rude is if someone asks Me a question that the answer was really already provided in My profile.

E2Sweet -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/15/2008 4:32:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: chiaThePet Whatever you should choose to do, just don't forget the pie. What, you don't want punch?... I always, always, always bring punch and pie! [:D]

chiaThePet -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/15/2008 9:39:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: E2Sweet quote: ORIGINAL: chiaThePet Whatever you should choose to do, just don't forget the pie. What, you don't want punch?... I always, always, always bring punch and pie! [:D] Alrighty then, by all means, punch it is. As long as the bruises are symmetrically tasteful. chia* (the pet)

LadyPact -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/15/2008 10:38:16 PM)
<In her best Cartman voice> Tell them that we'll have punch and pie. More people will show up if they think there will be punch and pie.

chiaThePet -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/15/2008 11:57:47 PM)
No kitty, this is my pot pie. chia* (the pet)

MsStarlett -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/16/2008 4:55:47 AM)
Did you want Cheezy Poofs with that?

chiaThePet -> RE: To approach or not approach..... (9/16/2008 7:05:28 AM)
I am not now, nor have I ever been, a Cheesy Poof. A Poof maybe, but never Cheesy. Not that I don't love Cheesy Poofs. chia* (the pet)

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