Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle?

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Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 11/29/2005 2:15:51 PM

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Greetings..~smiles~

In as much as there is no plausible one meaning definition that I could possibly give that would allow Everyone to agree on what a TPE within wiitwd lifestyle is..I will resort to using the definition/understanding that have seen most widely agreed to ..in that it is a transference of control from a giver to a receiver. Now in order to keep out bedroom play, occassional play (only because that is not the sense that I'm trying to find out) ..is it possible to live 24/7 in a TPE as switches?

thankyou in advance

starshine
Happy slave of Master Delvin

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 12/4/2005 3:32:18 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: starshineowned

Greetings..~smiles~

In as much as there is no plausible one meaning definition that I could possibly give that would allow Everyone to agree on what a TPE within wiitwd lifestyle is..I will resort to using the definition/understanding that have seen most widely agreed to ..in that it is a transference of control from a giver to a receiver. Now in order to keep out bedroom play, occassional play (only because that is not the sense that I'm trying to find out) ..is it possible to live 24/7 in a TPE as switches?

thankyou in advance

starshine
Happy slave of Master Delvin

I would say yes. It depends on who you switch with? Do you and your Master switch with each other? I suppose that would not meet the "clinical" definition of 24/7 TPE, but it can also get as granular as the usual Dominant defining the limits, the time period, etc, and you are not allowed to cross those boundaries without expecting to receive punishment for it. That still sounds like significant power exchange to me.
I am sure, judging by some of the profiles here on CM, that there are a lot of couples, where there is at least one switch, and they generally own swap roles when interacting with a 3rd party, not between the two of them

--Anopheles

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(in reply to starshineowned)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 12/13/2005 2:14:29 AM

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You can do what the heck you like, and you can call it want you want, you can do anything! that's the beauty of this lifestyle. As long as it works for the people concerned, that is ALL that counts, nothing else.

24/7 TPE between two switches? if there were very clear definitive boundries, maybe.

im a switch, but im living a submissive lifestyle, ergo, not switching at present. That does not lesson my submission, just makes it more difficult for us both at times.

So for us, there is 'fun time' where time out of the sub role allows all sorts of shinanigins

(in reply to anopheles)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 12/27/2005 12:18:40 PM

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I say "depends"

If you are sub to your partner, but like to top others, and your partner is vice-versa .... sounds like between the two of you it would still be TPE

fergus

(in reply to pandoravampire)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 12/31/2005 9:41:14 AM

SubmissiveBBW4U

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I agree with fergus.

I will be submissive to Master (when things finally move real time 24/7) always. Therefore with Him I will have a TPE relationship.

However, I will be allowed to top others as is His wish as well as mine.

So I would say yes a switch can have a TPE relationship.

_____________________________

~melissa

(in reply to fergus)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/1/2006 5:48:25 PM

TeeGO

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How about a poly relationship consisting of two males and two females. Male-1 tops Female-A, Female-A tops Male-2, Male-2 tops Female-B, and Female-B tops Male-1.

Every month one of them could be head of the house and the head's top would just be submissive to their top that month.

I doubt that exsits but I suppose it could. I know, I'm goofy. My Ma'am likes to call me a Dork when I come up with this wacky stuff.

(in reply to starshineowned)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/2/2006 8:56:38 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TeeGO

How about a poly relationship consisting of two males and two females. Male-1 tops Female-A, Female-A tops Male-2, Male-2 tops Female-B, and Female-B tops Male-1.

Every month one of them could be head of the house and the head's top would just be submissive to their top that month.

I doubt that exsits but I suppose it could. I know, I'm goofy. My Ma'am likes to call me a Dork when I come up with this wacky stuff.

Sounds like a crazy-ass BDSM pyramid scheme ;)

fergus

(in reply to TeeGO)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/6/2006 1:42:21 PM

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Why do you switches have to continually make your choice more and more complicated, by bringing in more and more, what if's?

Should I top....should I bottom...can there be a TPE.....which dildo do you like honey?, oh I forgot, I'll be the one on the recieving end tonight....LOL

To answer your question if TPE meant Too Perpetual Eccentricity I'd say "hell yes!"
However in a Total Power Exchange.....I don't think it can happen....Temporarily..maybe, but then one of you would change your mind and you'd be back to bickering about who the Top is tonight.

I gotta love you guys/gals though, you always hit the switch that makes me smile when I read this forum.

Peace, Kevin

_____________________________

Just because it hurts, doesn't necessarily make it a bad thing.

(in reply to fergus)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/6/2006 1:55:10 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane

Why do you switches have to continually make your choice more and more complicated, by bringing in more and more, what if's?

Should I top....should I bottom...can there be a TPE.....which dildo do you like honey?, oh I forgot, I'll be the one on the recieving end tonight....LOL

To answer your question if TPE meant Too Perpetual Eccentricity I'd say "hell yes!"
However in a Total Power Exchange.....I don't think it can happen....Temporarily..maybe, but then one of you would change your mind and you'd be back to bickering about who the Top is tonight.

I gotta love you guys/gals though, you always hit the switch that makes me smile when I read this forum.

Peace, Kevin

Hey Fastlane, good to have you back.

lol, I think the wondering and arguing is part of the fun ;)

Sort of like wrestling for control. And the 'loser' still wins :D

fergus

(in reply to fastlane)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/6/2006 5:33:30 PM

TeeGO

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Joined: 12/11/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane

Why do you switches have to continually make your choice more and more complicated, by bringing in more and more, what if's?

Should I top....should I bottom...can there be a TPE.....which dildo do you like honey?, oh I forgot, I'll be the one on the recieving end tonight....LOL

To answer your question if TPE meant Too Perpetual Eccentricity I'd say "hell yes!"
However in a Total Power Exchange.....I don't think it can happen....Temporarily..maybe, but then one of you would change your mind and you'd be back to bickering about who the Top is tonight.

I gotta love you guys/gals though, you always hit the switch that makes me smile when I read this forum.

Peace, Kevin

Mr. Lane, or can I call you Fast?

I can assure you a switch can be in a full D/s relationship. Even an M/s is possible. What I don’t believe is possible is one between two people when they switch roles periodically. (But even then if they think they have such a relationship then who am I to question it.) To me however, a Poly mind set is essential.

My “Ma’am” is a Switch. But to me she is a Dom and can never be anything but that even though I believe myself to have a switch in me. (Honestly at this point in time I am only concentrating on my submissive nature but anyway.)

She also desires and craves to be owned. She had/has a strong relationship with a Dom. They have had serious problems lately to the point she has looking in other directions. (However tonight they are together again. I don’t know what to expect but I’m hopeful it can be worked out between them. Only time will tell. And yes as bizarre as it might seem to some I am happy for her tonight and have nothing but positive thoughts and energy going their way.)

Yea, I’m a freak and proud of it.

(in reply to fastlane)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/6/2006 7:53:52 PM

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quote:

can assure you a switch can be in a full D/s relationship. Even an M/s is possible. What I don’t believe is possible is one between two people when they switch roles periodically. (But even then if they think they have such a relationship then who am I to question it.) To me however, a Poly mind set is essential.

My “Ma’am” is a Switch. But to me she is a Dom and can never be anything but that even though I believe myself to have a switch in me. (Honestly at this point in time I am only concentrating on my submissive nature but anyway.)

Not so sure where the poly falls in your mind as a requirement for switch. Personally that's one of those itchy points that leads people to believe that switches are do-me get mine whatever it takes people. It is possible to be switch and stay on one side of the bar and monogomous all at the same time. I've successfully done that in both my Top and bottom relationships that were both monogomous and years apart.

I like your Ma'am identify as Switch, though I am Domme to my boy. He has switchy tendencies that flair up from time to time (much like a rash) but with time, care and reinforcement of his sub side, comes through it without too many issues.

I think with many the flip side has to be repressed to a greater or lesser degree for a single relationship to be successful. FOR ME the idea of having relationships on both sides of the coin would be too much. I harness my Domme energy into my relationship. Any sub energy I channel into tasks that reward my boy for his service to me...doing his laundry, straightening the house while he's at work, making dinner. These things please me...mostly because I LOOOVE to cook and don't hate laundry but also relieve him of the responsibility of these tasks for a time.

Most successful switches that I know tend to lean one way or another in a relationship...but your milage may vary.

(in reply to TeeGO)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/7/2006 5:04:21 AM

TeeGO

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quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

Not so sure where the poly falls in your mind as a requirement for switch...
...FOR ME the idea of having relationships on both sides of the coin would be too much...

I apologize, I was not clear. My idea for a poly mindset is indeed when a Switch is not suppressing one side or the other.

But even then I suppose my statement was a bit too extreme. I know Pro-Dommes most often do not include sexual activity in their sessions so I would imagine that there are Switches in Submission to one (sexually involved) and Dominant to another (no sex involved) that would certainly qualify as D/s.

Of course none of this opinion really matters. What only matters is what the individuals involved in a relationship feel amongst themselves. That's the bottom line.

(in reply to theRose4U)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/7/2006 11:12:06 PM

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quote:

But even then I suppose my statement was a bit too extreme. I know Pro-Dommes most often do not include sexual activity in their sessions so I would imagine that there are Switches in Submission to one (sexually involved) and Dominant to another (no sex involved) that would certainly qualify as D/s.

TO ME this hingepin arrangement seems more like it would focus on the center player verses the Top and personally is what annoys me. I think too many see this kind of arrangement as what a switch is about...see I go both ways focus on me verses D/s or M/s being about focus on the top.

I think your bi-poly-switch arguement as applied to others is tragically flawed. I personally can't imagine it working long term for a firm foundation in any arm of the poly. Human nature being what it is, But your milage may vary.

< Message edited by theRose4U -- 1/7/2006 11:14:43 PM >

(in reply to TeeGO)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/8/2006 5:21:44 AM

TeeGO

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quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

TO ME this hingepin arrangement seems more like it would focus on the center player verses the Top and personally is what annoys me...

I think your bi-poly-switch arguement as applied to others is tragically flawed. I personally can't imagine it working long term for a firm foundation in any arm of the poly. Human nature being what it is, But your milage may vary.

Ah, I see what bothers you and at least in my life you are very right. Our relationship starts from the very Top. I am Sub to my Ma'am only because her Dom allowed it. It was an interesting dynamic to be sure. He and I had not met but there did appear to be mutial respect. He always asked her how I was doing and was genuinely interested in our relationship. I respected his authority in this dynamic.

I have no idea where this will go in the future. She assures me no matter what it will work out and I know she would not lose me so easily. One thing I do know for sure, it's out of my hands. After all, I'm the Sub.

(in reply to theRose4U)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 1/12/2006 9:31:43 PM

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Hello,

I'm new here so I figured I would jump in with both feet.

There doesn’t seem to be a reason, in my mind, that two people couldn’t be in a TPE (Total power exchange is what I'm understanding that to mean) and switch back and forth.

In a relationship where both people are switches and one takes the "primary" role of Dom and the other takes the "primary" role of sub I can see a switch taking place with a very simple solution. Asking permission. Just like anything else in the Dom/sub relationship that might seem a little outside of "normal" boundaries, if the sub asks permission, its showing submission, even if the permission is for the sub to be the Dom for whatever is the agreed amount of time, but that’s the key. Setting boundaries and adhering to them. Asking permission isn’t the only way to do it of course, but the seems to be the simplest answer.

I'm a switch and poly, so I understand the theory behind "One person cannot be everything to another person" and I believe it, but I also thing that trying to limit your relationship, if there is some potential somewhere, just because it doesn’t seem to be TPE, is doing the relationship (whatever form it comes in) a disservice.

We can only name things for ourselves truly.

(in reply to TeeGO)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 2/10/2006 4:27:47 AM

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Can a dominant have a vanilla relationship?

YES!

can a sub?

YES!

Can a switch be a sub for one relationship and a dom in the next one? YES!

Can a bottom kick a top's ass, humble them and the roles change? YES!

Is TPE forever and ever until death do we part in every single case? HELL NO!

So...if TPE doesn't have to last forever, why does it have to last for the entire duration of the relationship?

It does not.

'Nuff said.

(in reply to eriklone)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 2/10/2006 6:31:58 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: starshineowned

Greetings..~smiles~

In as much as there is no plausible one meaning definition that I could possibly give that would allow Everyone to agree on what a TPE within wiitwd lifestyle is..I will resort to using the definition/understanding that have seen most widely agreed to ..in that it is a transference of control from a giver to a receiver. Now in order to keep out bedroom play, occassional play (only because that is not the sense that I'm trying to find out) ..is it possible to live 24/7 in a TPE as switches?

thankyou in advance

starshine
Happy slave of Master Delvin

I don't use the term TPE but yes, many switches have someone they are involved with as an owner or slave 24/7, and have relationships with others where they are the other orientation.

A dom isn't somehow not in authority just because he's on a rack with someone else or getting groceries for someone else anymore than he's not in authority because he's taking his daughter to school or sleeping.

Same for submissives.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to starshineowned)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 2/10/2006 7:12:39 AM

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Okay but what I was trying to assertain though is it possible to say that when your in a relationship (two people) and between those two...the roles are switched around according to the needs of those two people. One week sue is a Domme to hank..the next week hank is a Dom to sue type of thing.

Though having those other scenerios brought up inwhich switches still define themselves as switches in was good to know. Thankyou

starshine
Happy slave of Master Delvin

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 2/19/2006 8:40:41 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane
Why do you switches have to continually make your choice more and more complicated, by bringing in more and more, what if's?

and

quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane
I gotta love you guys/gals though, you always hit the switch that makes me smile when I read this forum.

I gotta say when someone says "you switches" that always seems to make me smile too. lol.

_____________________________

~ShadeDiva
My projects of love:
theFetishForums
HumanFauna
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DommeWorld

(in reply to fastlane)

RE: Can switches state they live a TPE lifestyle? - 2/21/2006 8:46:56 PM

Laura

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From: Ontario, Canada
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TPE would drive me insane in a day. :) I'd never do it, never even talk about meeting with someone who expected that.

(in reply to ShadeDiva)

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