DominantDamsel -> RE: Ending a D/s Relationship (9/22/2008 11:07:14 PM)
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I found somewhat the same situation to be a concern, though I was not married to the man I was involved with. There were numerous issues that were not being dealt with, least of which was my total lack of desire to submit to him. Eventually I called it quits, though it took some time for me to accept that I couldn't change anyone but myself when all was said and done. I've retreated from that unfortunate place in my life and am now open to a new relationship built on what I really desire. I have little desire to submit these days. I have more desire to find a partner that is indeed interested in having a successful mature relationship that involves give and take from a place of equivalency first. Who we are from a D/s perspective will come to the surface and be dealt with in a fashion that contents us both, if the relationship is built on what counts. Security and trust create desire for adventure and sexual exploration. Until these are present, it's all just ..static. To my mind, there can be nothing real or truly satisfying until there is a collective meeting and mingling of two minds. When I really trust someone, respect them, and desire to know them better for who they are, the rest naturally follows in terms of a passionate sense. I now know that for me there can be no passion or play until there is a firm union based on far more than D/s roles enacted when the mood strikes.
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