porcelaine -> RE: Switches Finding Partners (9/5/2006 12:46:59 AM)
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: Laura Hoping for inspiration and ideas. I've been asked to write about Switches finding partners, the difficulties which are particular to us. My first thought was that it's about the same for everyone. But, then I thought that each time I contact someone (with the idea of getting together) it's really only other Switches that seem to get it. Guys who are sub or Dom seem to expect me to fall into whatever role they choose. As if it's something I plan ahead. Anyway, I don't want to be one hand clapping. Hope to hear from some of you. I think it depends on your situation and what you're seeking. I am a slave and a switch. I intentionally made the distinction between the two because I have no desire to switch with my dominant partner. If he bottomed to me that would eliminate my ability to submit to him in the future. I cannot wrap my mind around that aspect. Furthermore, my dominant tendencies are typically geared towards women, though I've developed an increasing flexibility to include men. However, I don't submit to women under any circumstances. See what I mean? I have found that is it far simpler for me to have a dominant that is open to my desire to top. While some have eagerly latched on to this idea due to my bisexuality, I am not inclined to share my bottom. Enter in problem number two. Nor do I consider myself polyamorous either. The list just keeps on growing. However, I am flexible and willing to make some compromises. I cannot say what will happen in the future, but for now I am solely focused on the submissive dynamic. I have noticed that it can be quite difficult for me to find a suitable partner due to my naturally dominant personality, divergently different views on submission, and the mere fact that I am not extremely needy nor waiting for someone to rescue me and make my life better. The mere fact that I can grab the reins, lead, and execute efficiently can be a difficult thing to accept if the dominant has insecurities about his competence. In time I've come to discover that the men I feel more attuned with are typically those that share a similar methodology with me in regard to dominance. Ironically enough I have found someone that is willing to work with me and deal with these things without complaint. I am convinced that he loves a challenge. porcelaine
|
|
|
|