Sllim1973 -> What can I offer a Dominant Lady? (8/3/2004 11:32:25 PM)
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My most sincere apologies for that other thread. I have asked nicely that some mod make it go away. I honestly didn't look through this forum long enough before posting it. For that I deserve a severe whipping. While I was realizing the error of my ways I came across some posts by Mistresses and Doms discussing what the potential sub has to offer the Mistress. Yeah, if epipheny's were made into bricks then this one would have landed in the back of my head. The posts went on to discuss this male sub thing, this 'me-me-me' thing and how normal, plentiful and unapealing it must be. The thread I was reading it in was mostly being responded to by male Dominants, not the Female Dominants that I need to be talking with. But it seemed like a universal truth. A sin that I think I am guilty of. This leads me to ask a really, really important question. You Misstresses out there, what exactly do you look for your subs to be offering you? I don't mean monetarily, that is just, well to be honest - this idea that some people sign over financial dominance just seems kinda insane to me. And physically, well that is a no-brainer as well. Breaking taboos (with the exclusion of things with 'brown' and 'golden' in the title) is something that is very, very appealing to me. S&M is too. I like to be pushed, physically, mentally and yes emotionally. There we covered the physical part of what I have to offer. Big whoop. I think THAT is exactly what the posters meant with the entire 'me-me-me' mentality. So that leaves the quandry of what is it as a sub I have to offer a Lady mentally - or maybe emotionally? I think what I offer is trust. I went to a play party once a couple years ago. And I saw something that just burned its way into my soul. This entire Dom/sub thing - it is a thing of trust. It is a relationship of such exquisite trust and it is something that is truly beautiful. It goes beyond trust in the normal vanilla world. Hell, it runs rings around it. Trust is what I hope to offer my dominant. Trust that we can sit down and talk before we play about what it is we want out of this, trust that we can talk after we are done about what happened. Trust that the Dominant understands the submissives lines, hard lines that are never to be crossed, soft lines that they are working towards crossing, but not yet ready to cross. Trust that the submissive understands that the scene is something he is offering the dominant as a gift. That he must have trust that the things he does, the performances he acts out are so serving his Mistress that the rewards she will reap on him will be beyond the small and benign things that one would see in a vanilla world. Trust that the chemistry is there between the two that in giving to each what there role is something larger then the parts will emerge. I think at the exact second, at 2:30 in the morning, in a self examining sorta mood THAT is what I would define as what I have to offer a Dominant Lady. So am I on the right track? Have I earned the title of 'Having a clue'?
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