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DameDarkness -> PMS (12/10/2005 12:23:33 PM)
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THE HORMONE WARNING: The Hormone Hostage knows that there
are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he
takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should
be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband,
boyfriend, or significant other!
DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.
ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
> DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
> SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
> SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
> ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
> DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
> SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.
> SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
> ULTRA SAFE: Have some more chocolate.
>
> 13 Things PMS Stands For
> 1. Pass My Shotgun
> 2. Psychotic Mood Shift
> 3. Perpetual Munching Spree
> 4. Puffy Mid-Section
> 5. People Make me Sick
> 6. Provide Me with Sweets
> 7. Pardon My Sobbing
> 8. Pimples May Surface
> 9. Pass My Sweatpants
> 10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
> 11. Plainly; Men Suck
> 12. Pack My Stuff
>
> And my favorite one...
> 13. Potential Murder Suspect
>
> Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those
> who might need a good Laugh! Or men who need a warning.
>
> And remember: Money talks.... But Chocolate sings
> Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, and
> it's up to women to stomp the crap out of them until
they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.
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