Breaking the Blank

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Breaking the Blank - 10/24/2008 2:03:20 AM

TaintedEyes

Posts: 25
Joined: 2/21/2008
From: World Citizen
Status: offline

Good Evening, Good morning, and hello, depending on where in this technologically tiny world you are.

It's been quite a time since I made a post on here, and this is vastly overdue.

I live my life as a switch, and it never really confused me until recently. No, I have no desire to fall to one side or another, as i very much enjoy both, rather that I've been drawing a sort of blank lately, and I'm not entirely sure how to fix it. This is an entirely sexual situation, fair warning.

The last two relationship type lovers I had were both dominant types, and while I gave suggestions, I was never confused as to a "what next" situation, as it was usually handled by them, or mutually.

However recently someone has said to me, in the heat of the moment, "I want to you tell me exactly what you want me to do." Aside from a couple minor things, I completely drew a blank, and it was EXTREMELY frustrating, because I'm usually overflowing with creative and sometimes rather dirty thoughts, and I couldn't think of anything.

So my post here, I suppose, is to ask advice. I need to break the blank, as I don't want to let them down, as well as myself.

I'm not looking for epiphanies, perhaps just a story of something interesting that sprung into your mind in a similar situation, or possible suggestions of things to consider?

xxo,
T.E.

_____________________________

I am the White Rabbit. So if you dare and if you please, follow me and you shall see just how adventurous my thoughts can be.

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RE: Breaking the Blank - 10/24/2008 7:31:03 PM

DreamsOfSpider

Posts: 56
Joined: 12/4/2006
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In terms of creativity in general, I personally find that reading/viewing other people's work always inspires me... I usually end up going in a different direction, but it gives me ideas for where to start. That's assuming you're still feeling blank... if you thought of all kinds of things after the moment had passed, well, pick a few and create a scenario for "next time." The person doesn't have to know that it isn't off-the-cuff improv. ;)

(in reply to TaintedEyes)

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RE: Breaking the Blank - 10/26/2008 1:56:31 PM

Max1000

Posts: 28
Joined: 10/25/2008
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If you want to stall for time or not feel rushed, plan in advance and always tell them to look at the floor so they can't see you scan the room for inspiration.

Or throw the onus on them.

(in reply to DreamsOfSpider)

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RE: Breaking the Blank - 11/1/2008 11:51:10 AM

StrongSpirit

Posts: 575
Joined: 4/10/2005
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Things a sub might say if asked "what do you want"

Paint me with body paint and take pictures.
Tie me up and cut my (old) clothing off.
Blindfold me and feed me things (classic, but worth it.)
Chain me up and spank me while I do the dishes (not for everyone)
Can I please give you a lap dance? (works better if you have taken a class on how to do it well)

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RE: Breaking the Blank - 11/3/2008 10:06:44 AM

Glaucon

Posts: 1
Joined: 6/11/2008
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Well, for whatever they're worth here are my thoughts on that situation. By posing that as a serious question (as opposed to a rhetorical question) that Dom let you down. lol, tell them to gag you. or, try to take control of the situation and find some way to reverse the roles. How exactly you would do that, I'm not shure. I suppose you couldn't just tell them that you want them to stay in control.

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RE: Breaking the Blank - 11/3/2008 5:01:43 PM

ProlificNeeds

Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
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Tell them to go sit in a corner while you think it over.

Nothing worse for my creativity than the pressure of someone being right there expectign results NOW. It turns me off as effectively as shutting off the lights. Creativity disappears, and it's always been that way, it comes when it feels like it, and refuses to be dominated by me or my partners whims.

(in reply to Glaucon)

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RE: Breaking the Blank - 11/10/2008 3:11:00 PM

blu3boy1

Posts: 4
Status: offline

I take the opposite approach, I try to keep things light all the time. Just look for the least sexy thing in the room and make it yours. the caster on a night stand, a cleanser bottle, anything. just get creative with it.

If all else fails turn to breath play. guaranteed to make something come to mind for you or your partner *wink*.

Blu3

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RE: Breaking the Blank - 11/25/2008 10:49:04 PM

wolfhurst

Posts: 3
Joined: 11/25/2008
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I know exactly what you mean, TaintedEyes. I enjoy the dominant role, but it's certainly more work, and like you, I occasionally run out of ideas. When that happens, there are several things I can fall back on:

something I know will push her buttons (in my fiancée's case, that would probably be spanking or knife play)
an outlandish idea, dredged up from that long list of things I've read but not tried
something familiar, but with a new twist (an extra condition, something else done at the same time, you get the idea)

I'll try to remember to ask my fiancée what she does when she's the one drawing a blank. Actually, this may be one reason we're both slightly more sub than dom: it's less work! :)

(in reply to blu3boy1)

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