Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message


lobodomslavery -> Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 12:59:10 PM)

Looking at the profiles, i m struck by how many of them are seeking to own individuals. My question is this what happened to old fashioned boy meets girl, buys her treats and drinks and leaves her short for nothing and girl is well pleased. When did the gradation towards the desire for owning human property begin. And Ladies has feminism gone too far now with the desire of many Women on this site to not only court the opposite sex but to actually control their partner in every way.  Where did this Female control buzz start ladies. Did your parents give you this idea. Where did it all emanate from. I d like to know the responses.  Feel free to respond any way you wish
kevin




Lockit -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:08:48 PM)

Kevin, we are all different.  Not everyone wishes to own property... of the human kind.  I like a female led relationship and am a bit kinky too... but to own someone isn't my goal, kink or buzz.  I do not see being femdom as feminist.  Not in any way.  I see it as a natural personality that is instinctive and that life enhances in ways.  No one taught me to be dominant in personality, though I have learned things in kink and such from life experiences and such.  I was not harmed in a way that made me lash out or wish to control life and people.  No person influenced what I do and live.  It is just a life choice determined by who I am at my core. 

I believe in balance and I have no need to control someone... I just like to! lol

Why are you interested?  Is there something that draws you or damaged you that brought you to present as a submissive male?




AquaticSub -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:12:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Looking at the profiles, i m struck by how many of them are seeking to own individuals. My question is this what happened to old fashioned boy meets girl, buys her treats and drinks and leaves her short for nothing and girl is well pleased. When did the gradation towards the desire for owning human property begin. And Ladies has feminism gone too far now with the desire of many Women on this site to not only court the opposite sex but to actually control their partner in every way.  Where did this Female control buzz start ladies. Did your parents give you this idea. Where did it all emanate from. I d like to know the responses.  Feel free to respond any way you wish
kevin



Why the hell do you think we do this? It is fun.

I'm not a matyr and I have frequently said that being in my relationship with Valyraen as his girl is a very selfish thing on my part. I've done the whole "we have equal power in the relationship" thing and it bored me to tears. I was miserable, sexually unfilled and my eye was always roaming. They were sweet guys but we just didn't click for the long term because they weren't 24/7 doms or alphas.

And no, I was never abused as a child. My parents loved me, sent me to great schools, backed me up 100 percent, helped me with my homework, came to my art and martial arts classes, Daddy never touched me in a bad way and I didn't have sex till I was 18. Nor was I ever encouraged to serve men, I was always encouraged to be a strong and independent woman and I think it worked because I have the courage to say "Fuck society. This makes me happy."

My relationship with Valyraen is also a very loving one. If you saw us from the outside, you'd probably think we are what you are talking about - because we are. We just do things a little differently. When we go out to dinner, we hold hands and he kisses me, calls me his "Sweetheart" and puts his arm around my waist. I tease him with a bright smile and say he's my "Honey bunches of Oats" (yeah we're disgusting - I know). I'm simply not left short for anything - I get more affection, support in my own interests (he is the only partner I've ever had who not only encourages me to attend martial arts but actually came to my classes to watch me. He attended my belt test and afterwards told me how proud he was), and understanding than in any of my relationships. He adores that I'm geek (I'm getting comics for our anniversary! *does the happy butt-shake dance*).

In a phrase - Valyraen gets me, completely and totally. We fit each other, I don't like making decisions and he does. I like having my ass beaten, he likes watching it turn red. I like being tied down, he likes watching me squirm. Our families are also a great fit and I frequently tease him that he can never leave me because his Mother and Grandmother would never forgive him. My parents positively love him and can't wait for our upcoming wedding and their grandchildern.

There is a lot more love in these relationship then you seem to realize. Not everyoe wants love but a lot of us do and most of the relationships here look very "vanilla" from the outside. I hope I helped you see it a little more.




lobodomslavery -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:13:58 PM)

hi Lockit, i was always brought up to show the utmost respect toWomen and i always did and still do. and while i absolutely despised patriarchy and the way it treated Women for decades, in some ways i see the current role reversal as something similar. i dont know im just baffled at the number of Female Dominants that are sadistic. it s almost as if that You are say Dominant and Female and not sadistic that you are very unusua in a large minority if you will and the number of Female Slave owners and Slave seekers astonishes me. it s strange.
kevin




AquaticSub -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:17:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

hi Lockit, i was always brought up to show the utmost respect toWomen and i always did and still do. and while i absolutely despised patriarchy and the way it treated Women for decades, in some ways i see the current role reversal as something similar. i dont know im just baffled at the number of Female Dominants that are sadistic. it s almost as if that You are say Dominant and Female and not sadistic that you are very unusua in a large minority if you will and the number of Female Slave owners and Slave seekers astonishes me. it s strange.
kevin



Just a point: What good is respect if the person being respected is miserable? There are many different ways of showing respect and one is respecting that women can make many different choices in how they want to live their lives.

As for the number of female sadists... *shrugs with a grin* You are on a site that caters to kink.




lobodomslavery -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:17:48 PM)

i appreciate your point of view Miss. but coming from this side of Atlantic its possibly hard for me in ireland to understand.  ill give you a simple example. most kids hate being slapped yeah and from where i am from anyway i did. you feared punishment. so why suddenly when you take it from an adult its ok. i find it bizarre but in one way no more bizarre than alcoholism in ireland which i dont subscribe to
kevin




RumpusParable -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:20:00 PM)

You *do* realize you're on a kink and D/s site, right?  It stands to reason you'd find a lot of kink and D/s oriented males and females. 




AquaticSub -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:20:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

i appreciate your point of view Miss. but coming from this side of Atlantic its possibly hard for me in ireland to understand.  ill give you a simple example. most kids hate being slapped yeah and from where i am from anyway i did. you feared punishment. so why suddenly when you take it from an adult its ok. i find it bizarre but in one way no more bizarre than alcoholism in ireland which i dont subscribe to
kevin



I hate being slapped unless it's sexual. Most people hate being bitten but it's very normal to enjoy some love nips, isn't it? I know for fact that kinky folks aren't the only ones who show off their bruises.




lobodomslavery -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:21:57 PM)

Yes i respect that but i am perturbed as to why in say suddenly 2000 or early 90s it kicked off. i mean for generations men ruled the roost and that was wrong right. but there was none of this sadistic stuff going on not least where i was growing up anyway and nobody viewed anyone else as Dominant slave or sub. i just find it weird that suddenly in the 90s everything changed after years of relative constancy for want of a better word where certainly Women were not viewed as superior to men and men were neither viewed as superior to Women
kevin




Lynnxz -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:22:37 PM)

Lobo, you are a fan of starting provocative, anti feminine posts, then crying about it when people disagree with you.

Stop trolling.

You are not some innocent martyred victim.

If you are not trolling, I strongly doubt you are cut out for even a bit of roleplay in the bedroom.




lobodomslavery -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:24:35 PM)

Yes Ma'am i know that. But like i say, ok, when did you discover you were Dominant , you were not born that way, were you or have guys been submissive to you for a long long time, when is the last i suppose ill ask that You followed a guy's orders or the last time you were vanilla even. Is your family kinky. Where did it emanate from?
kevin




AquaticSub -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:26:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Yes i respect that but i am perturbed as to why in say suddenly 2000 or early 90s it kicked off. i mean for generations men ruled the roost and that was wrong right. but there was none of this sadistic stuff going on not least where i was growing up anyway and nobody viewed anyone else as Dominant slave or sub. i just find it weird that suddenly in the 90s everything changed after years of relative constancy for want of a better word where certainly Women were not viewed as superior to men and men were neither viewed as superior to Women
kevin



It was wrong for some and right for others. Which you should respect. But if you think the sadistic stuff wasn't going on you are deluding yourself. I belong to a group that delights in vintage, black and white porn. I have seen photographic evidence that this has been on for awhile. It simply hasn't been talked about. I'm curious though, if you dislike supremacy so much, why you capitalize the "w" in women.

I do not submit to Valyraen because he is a man but because he is my mate. I do not believe him superior and he does not believe me inferior. This reflects in how I write. That you choose to alter the accepted grammar rules to reflect something different is interesting.




Lockit -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:26:49 PM)

What has changed is that people are more open and more public about things.  This stuff has been going on since the begining of mankind from what I have read.  No one in the fifties had a strong wife with a man who did her bidding?  lol... not from what I saw in family and such! lol  Grandpa only thought he ruled! lol  That man retired and grandma ran everything... he cooked, cleaned and took care of her, getting breakfast and all that.  No wonder grandma was reluctant to retire! lol




lobodomslavery -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:27:26 PM)

im not anti feminist. i m very pro Women actually and frequently give up my bus seat for Women, i never ever put myself before a Woman never. im just curious as to how some Women started viewing themselves as superior to men and some Women see themselves as submissive and what is really strange there seems to be more Female Dominants on this site than men, id say they outnumber men 10 to one if not more and all from a once put upon gender which was disgraceful and wrong, but the role reversal is stunning to witness
kevin




RCdc -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:27:41 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Yes i respect that but i am perturbed as to why in say suddenly 2000 or early 90s it kicked off. i mean for generations men ruled the roost and that was wrong right. but there was none of this sadistic stuff going on not least where i was growing up anyway and nobody viewed anyone else as Dominant slave or sub. i just find it weird that suddenly in the 90s everything changed after years of relative constancy for want of a better word where certainly Women were not viewed as superior to men and men were neither viewed as superior to Women
kevin



Kevin
You do realise that BDSM existed prior to the '90s?
 
the.dark.




AquaticSub -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:28:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lockit

What has changed is that people are more open and more public about things.  This stuff has been going on since the begining of mankind from what I have read.  No one in the fifties had a strong wife with a man who did her bidding?  lol... not from what I saw in family and such! lol  Grandpa only thought he ruled! lol  That man retired and grandma ran everything... he cooked, cleaned and took care of her, getting breakfast and all that.  No wonder grandma was reluctant to retire! lol


LOL - Quite true! What's that old saying "The man is the head of the house but the woman is the neck. She can turn him any way she wants." Mothers lovingly handed down the tricks of making him think the new ideas were his. [;)]




DiurnalVampire -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:28:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Looking at the profiles, i m struck by how many of them are seeking to own individuals. My question is this what happened to old fashioned boy meets girl, buys her treats and drinks and leaves her short for nothing and girl is well pleased. When did the gradation towards the desire for owning human property begin. And Ladies has feminism gone too far now with the desire of many Women on this site to not only court the opposite sex but to actually control their partner in every way.  Where did this Female control buzz start ladies. Did your parents give you this idea. Where did it all emanate from. I d like to know the responses.  Feel free to respond any way you wish
kevin



If you are a slave, upset becasue someone didnt want to own you becasue of you past depression... where did this come from?
This is what you are looking to be part of!

I own Fox. Lock stock and barrel. It is fun, we love our life. I dont know why you wold complain that they dont want to own you, then complain about others wanting to own others.

The more you post, the worse you make yourself seem.

DV




OttersSwim -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:29:01 PM)

My Lady often jokes - "You did read in my profile that I am a bit of a sadist, right?"  ..and I laugh nervously...

Honestly, I wonder...if a male Dom is a sadist, no one looks twice.  And so, why is it not perfectly fine for the female dominants to be sadistic too?  Dominance and the application of pain, IMO, are like chocolate and peanut butter...now, not everyone likes them together, and a few not at all, but it is the Reeses combo of the BDSM world I think and it is popular with a LOT of the Ladies...and why not?  It's delicious... [;)]




AquaticSub -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:29:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

what is really strange there seems to be more Female Dominants on this site than men, id say they outnumber men 10 to one if not more and all from a once put upon gender which was disgraceful and wrong, but the role reversal is stunning to witness
kevin



I think you are the only person I've ever seen who says that.




AAkasha -> RE: Are there any Dommes who just do this for fun (11/4/2008 1:30:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery

Looking at the profiles, i m struck by how many of them are seeking to own individuals. My question is this what happened to old fashioned boy meets girl, buys her treats and drinks and leaves her short for nothing and girl is well pleased. When did the gradation towards the desire for owning human property begin. And Ladies has feminism gone too far now with the desire of many Women on this site to not only court the opposite sex but to actually control their partner in every way.  Where did this Female control buzz start ladies. Did your parents give you this idea. Where did it all emanate from. I d like to know the responses.  Feel free to respond any way you wish
kevin



Are you into S&M, power exchange, kink, BDSM or just into having a girlfriend and being devoted?
Mistresses/slaves do not own the market on "devotion" you know - plenty of vanilla husbands are deeply devoted to women who enjoy being spoiled. This is a kinky web site.

Akasha




Page: [1] 2 3 4   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.046875