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Fetish Buddies ?? - 12/4/2008 10:34:13 PM

SweetCherries

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I was thinking when i meet a sub and I don't know them other then online and phone etc how can I be safe , I know the first thing get to know all you can and meet in public places but still you can never be to careful.

also you can bring a friend , well I don;t have friend who are in to this. so what can I do ,,,

Th question is :
How can I get a what I like to call Fetish Buddy ?

I live in Philadelphia Pa, I know north Philly and south Philly and center city any one here interested?

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< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 12/5/2008 7:26:45 AM >

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RE: Fetish Buddies ?? - 12/5/2008 6:53:12 AM

xxblushesxx

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I talk to them for so long that anyone who was looking to abuse me (non-consentually) would have given up by the time we meet (if we meet) for easier pickens!

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RE: Fetish Buddies ?? - 12/5/2008 7:16:44 AM

CarrieO

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I'm not sure if this is the kind of advice you're looking for, but....

I use safe calls...many of them...when first meeting with someone. I call before we meet, during and after. We have a set conversation and depending on the phrase I use, my friend will know how to proceed. When I meet with someone new...public or not...my safecall person has ALL the information I have (not just what they've given me but what I've learned through my own checking...and I'm very good!) along with the phone number of the police local to the area I'm in.

The friends I use as safe calls are 100% vanilla and are completely aware of my proclivities. They were the people I trust most to look out for my best interest and it only made sense to rely on them.

That being said....I'm still not 100% safe. Safe calls aren't infallible and that's why it falls on you to learn what you can before you meet with someone. Common sense...like not posting your private email on a public forum...is important. Try to connect with some of the local groups in your area.

http://www.domsubfriends.com/cgi-local/wwwdir/db.cgi?db=org&uid=default&state=PENNSYLVANIA&view_records=View+Records&ww=on Might be a good place to start. Maybe you can meet a "fet-buddy" that way.

Good luck and be smart!

*edited to add....this is what works for me and is in no way meant to be perfect for others. It was offered simply as advice...nothing more.*

< Message edited by CarrieO -- 12/5/2008 7:29:18 AM >

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RE: Fetish Buddies ?? - 12/5/2008 10:37:21 AM

SteelofUtah

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My only advice.

The Prize is often multiplied by the amount of risk you take. If you take no risks then you usually only achieve a certain kind of prize.

Am I saying that you should go out and meet every Tom's Harry Dick you meet online. No! but at some point living in fear of what ake murder they may be will leave your dance card rather empty.

Steel

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RE: Fetish Buddies ?? - 12/5/2008 11:23:25 AM

xxblushesxx

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Idk, Steel, my particular prizes were mulitiplied by the time and effort I put into getting to know them.
I don't know about the dance card problem, since I'm not currently looking, but, I didn't have that issue when I was.

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RE: Fetish Buddies ?? - 12/5/2008 12:27:33 PM

SteelofUtah

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See blushes this is one of those topics I get caught in a corner with.

I'll tell you a story. This is a Real Story it REALLY happened.

A close personal friend wanted to meet a nice girl and so he went online. He was an attractive guy and so he got MANY replies and started getting to know all of them, he would be talking for HOURS with these girls, at one point he had started writting letters to one of them. He Poured out his Life in these letters allowing intament details of his private live. Then one day he came home and found he had been robbed and the lady he had spent the last 3 months chatting with was a Large Black Man who had been writing this guy with the intent of getting to know how he functioned and then robbing him or playing him for money, Obviouly the Robber was caught. He called the police and when they arrived to investigate the neighbor came out and started talking to him about what had happened. Now that neighbor is his wife and they have 3 beauiful children one from her previous marriage.

The Point, The ONLY point I ever want to make when I rely to these kinds of threads are, NOTHING is fool proof and Lightening DOES strike so rather than sitting behind the blinds peaking out to see what is going on outside your window, GO OUTSIDE and EXPERIENCE IT!.

I just hate it when people live thier life thinking that every peoson they meet is somhow a serial killer or just going to fuck them over some how. In reality the reason most people have so many masty situations is BECAUSE they are always looking for them to happen.

Just Be Human and Make Mistakes and Learn from them and put yourself out there.

Some people are so afraid to get hurt they never put themselves out there in a real situation where it might happen and if you never put yourself out there then you will never find what you are looking for unless it stumbles over you and well I'm not that Lucky now am I that Fragile. NO ONE should ever be THAT fragile.

Just an Opinion mind you.

Steel

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RE: Fetish Buddies ?? - 12/5/2008 3:30:48 PM

DesFIP

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To make friends who you can use for safe calls, you can just go to local munches and talk to other women.

Beyond that, even your nonkinky friends should be fine with being your safe call. They say 1 in 8 meet online nowadays. Better than hanging out at a bar!

So you should be able to ask a friend to come to Starbucks with you and sit across the room while you meet someone. And have her watch for a discrete signal that means call and give you an excuse to leave. That way if the guy gives you weird vibes, you drop your bag or empty cup, she pulls out her cell and rings you. You answer and then tell the guy your mother's ill and you need to run. Meeting up with her outside.

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