Listen to yourself and you can answer your own question. You are clearly disturbed by what is happening, so, no, it isn't right.
The only solution is to talk to the person who is doing the hurting. Tell him what you're struggling with, and either the situation is resolved, or it isn't.
If the deception continues, you need to ask yourself whether it is more important for you to be in a relationship, regardless of the level of honesty of the participants, or more important for you to be in a relationship that is honest, even if it means not being in a particular relationship.
If you decide it's more important to have -any- relationship, even if it is one based on dishonesty, that's ok, but you're going to have to realize that it will be up to you to accept that the deception is part of the relationship you have. You'll have to bear the burden of knowing that honesty won't be part of your relationship.
If you decide that honesty is more important to you than a particular relationship, that's ok, too -- different responsibilities, but only you can judge what is most important to you. If you -do- decide that honesty is more important than being in the relationship, then it will be up to you to be strong and walk away. Your burden will be knowing that you're letting go of this relationship because it does not meet your needs.
< Message edited by CallaFirestormBW -- 12/11/2008 9:56:21 AM >
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"
"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer