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Mail-order hymen - 12/20/2008 11:16:45 AM

thornhappy

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Joined: 12/16/2006
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There is no better place for this than Random Stupidity, from Salon.com.

"Good news via the Frisky: It's now easier than ever to avoid the shame of being exposed as an impure woman, thanks to the Artificial Virginity Hymen! It leaks fake blood and causes your vagina to become inflamed and swollen, all for just $14.90. What a deal.

The product, sold by online sex shop Gigimo, reportedly contains "natural albumin, medical use inflation element and water-soluble base medicinal preparation which have no side effect" -- which is to say, it's entirely unclear how it works or what it is, exactly. Gigimo provides the following instructions: "Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully" – which is odd, because the hymen isn't inside the vagina -- "It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groan, you will pass through undetectable" (as the little whore that you really are).

As patently ridiculous as this product is, the thinking behind it is all too familiar: The site promises that the product allows you to "no more worry about losing your virginity" -- as though deciding to have sex for the first time is only significant because your hymen will be "broken" (never mind that hymens often tear from other wholesome activities, like horseback riding) and renders you spoiled goods in the eyes of future suitors. It isn't a decision of emotional significance but rather a dangerous gamble on your reputation -- if things don't work out with Your First, you're shamed for life. Unless, of course, you go to great lengths to fake your purity.

I might offer a practical and (relatively) optimistic kicker to this post -- hey, it could prevent hymenoplasties and divorces over bloodless bed sheets! -- only, I somehow doubt that this dinky sex shop product will offer convincing enough proof."

< Message edited by thornhappy -- 12/20/2008 11:17:33 AM >

Post #: 1

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/20/2008 11:56:12 AM

LumusandtheLady

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Just as I think I've heard it all.... And I thought the surgical reconstruction was bad enough.

Rain da unbeliever

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Post #: 2

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/20/2008 12:03:07 PM

cjan

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I think Potty might be interested in this product. You should alert her, thorny.

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Post #: 3

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/20/2008 12:39:26 PM

thornhappy

Posts: 8596
Joined: 12/16/2006
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Hmmm, I'll twig her to it when she gets back online....

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RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/20/2008 8:51:09 PM

sunshinemiss

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dang, this makes fake orgasms seem like just a little white lie.

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RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/20/2008 9:13:10 PM

thornhappy

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Too true , too true.

I'm gonna have to go to bed, even though one of my favorite flicks is going to be on shortly (The McKenzie Break.) Got it all set to record on the DVR. The bed is calling..calling..zzzzzz

(in reply to sunshinemiss)

Post #: 6

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/20/2008 9:39:18 PM

corysub

Posts: 1492
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Hmmm....not the same thing but if something "artificial" is of interest...the following link I saw on another thread might also be of interest... :)
Might be the perfect Christmas present for a guy who has everything! Might make a nice lamp...dontcha think???

http://www.holisticwisdom.com/make-your-own-vagina-clone-a-pussy.htm

(in reply to thornhappy)

Post #: 7

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/21/2008 8:50:00 AM

OneMoreWaste

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Joined: 8/24/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: thornhappy

There is no better place for this than Random Stupidity, from Salon.com.

"Good news via the Frisky: It's now easier than ever to avoid the shame of being exposed as an impure woman, thanks to the Artificial Virginity Hymen! It leaks fake blood and causes your vagina to become inflamed and swollen, all for just $14.90. What a deal.

Even better- they're cheaper when you buy in bulk!

_____________________________

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Post #: 8

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/21/2008 10:27:37 PM

MarksFantasyGirl

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Wrong, wrong, wrong, WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Post #: 9

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 5:34:13 AM

DarkSteven

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Lemme get this straight. Every woman reading this thread (or on collarme in general) has ten paddles, enough rope for three Boy Scout troops, floggers, violet wands, nipple clamps, and six vibrators. So when a man has sex with this woman for the first time, he's supposed to think, "Hey, she could open up four sex shops with all her gear. But I KNOW she's a virgin because she bled!"

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Post #: 10

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 6:04:07 AM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
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From: St George Utah
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See I see this helping to make more men believe that thier wife is a pristine as they say.

I mean comeone who's still a virgin after Junior High Right?

Steel

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Post #: 11

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 6:42:40 AM

jazana

Posts: 93
Joined: 12/21/2008
From: The land down under
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As strange as they are, I might end up buying one for that "if you were my first" roleplay scene

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Post #: 12

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 8:25:16 AM

SteelofUtah

Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
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Okay That could be hot.

Or you could just wait for the natural stuff every 28 days or so.

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Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

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Post #: 13

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 10:18:29 AM

adrian28

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Joined: 3/8/2008
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Personally, I prefer a woman who knows what the hell she's doing. Just me though.

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Post #: 14

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 10:50:57 AM

VirginPotty

Posts: 11624
Joined: 7/16/2008
From: Virginville
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cjan

I think Potty might be interested in this product. You should alert her, thorny.

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Post #: 15

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 10:52:05 AM

VirginPotty

Posts: 11624
Joined: 7/16/2008
From: Virginville
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SteelofUtah

I mean comeone who's still a virgin after Junior High Right?

Steel

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Post #: 16

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 12:26:20 PM

sirsholly

Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline

hey Pots...get this mail order thing and you would not by fibbing every time you call yourself a *snickersnort* virgin

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GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
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GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

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Post #: 17

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 12:35:44 PM

PanthersMom

Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline

for the girl too cheap to get a hymenoplasty! this one goes into the "i never thought i'd see this" file.

PM

edited because the pain pills are kicking in and i'm getting the stupids!

< Message edited by PanthersMom -- 12/23/2008 12:53:44 PM >

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Post #: 18

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 12:36:24 PM

VirginPotty

Posts: 11624
Joined: 7/16/2008
From: Virginville
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Do me a favor, Clumsy. When you get YOUR Christmas present, shove it in your mouth & press "Start"!!!

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Post #: 19

RE: Mail-order hymen - 12/23/2008 1:12:35 PM

sirsholly

Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VirginPotty

Do me a favor, Clumsy. When you get YOUR Christmas present, shove it in your mouth & press "Start"!!!

why do i get the feeling i will not find it enjoyable?

_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)

(in reply to VirginPotty)

Post #: 20

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