behindtheseeyes
Posts: 13
Joined: 4/13/2008
Status: offline
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What is the difference between a supermarket shopping bag and Michael Jackson?
One is made of plastic and is very dangerous to children; the other holds groceries
A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it.
The thief was spending less than his wife did
Guy walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck.
Bartender says, "All right, I'll let ya stay---but don't start nuthin."
Did you hear about the new "morning after" pill for men?
It changes your blood type
What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
45 lbs.
What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
45 minutes
What is the main reason Santa is so jolly?
He knows where all the bad girls live
Did you hear about the new "Divorce Barbie"?
It comes with all of Ken's stuff
When a man talks nasty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. What is it when a woman talks nasty to a man?
$3.99 a minute
How are women and rocks alike?
You skip the flat ones
How can you tell if your wife is dead?
The sex is the same but the dishes pile up
What do anniversaries and toilets have in common?
Men always miss them
< Message edited by behindtheseeyes -- 1/13/2009 2:58:05 PM >
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just a few of my favorite one line jokes - 
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