|
Padriag -> RE: Your partner posing nude or for porn, hard limit? (1/15/2009 5:44:14 PM)
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant
quote:
ORIGINAL: curvyslavegirl
How exactly could someone's past behaviors be considered a "hard limit".
It doesn't affect your current relationship (unless they're actively doing porn).
It's just being judgmental.
I disagree. This is not jumping on you in particular, slavegirl but against those who think the past is just that...the past. That's a wonderful way to think and if you can do so, more power to you. However, there are those on here whose professions could be damaged if a partner's past behavior were known. And oddly enough, the fact that a person had done a porno film or posed for porno/kinky photos could be more of a problem than the fact that the person had been a criminal of some sort (depending on the crime, of course). That happens because many tend to look at past criminal behavior as an indicator and study the person closely now to see if they really are remorseful for their crimes. They tend to do the same thing with someone who has a known sexual past when that sexual past has a lurid nature to it BUT along with that scrutiny comes the hope/anticipation(?) that they will fall back to their "sexually deviant, wicked ways".
Thank you for stating that so eloquently CD. I'm one of those people it applies too. My life has taken some very unexpected turns this past year and I find myself now in a position where I've become something of a "pillar" of the community. I work with / in the town government, I'm frequently involved in community events, I own and operate a civic center, I sponsor events for the youth, I was photographed with the mayor and or town council no less than a dozen times in 2008, I'm finding myself being regularly interviewed by the local news media on a variety of topics... whether I like it or not (and some days I really don't) I've become a public figure and a role model. Not something I planned or intended, but Life has this perverse habit of doing things I didn't expect.
So for me, yes... having been in porn movies, posed for kinky photo shoots, etc. would be a hard limit for me at this point. I've dated a couple of porn actresses in the past, as well as more strippers than I care to recall. Something like that would be a PR nightmare for me now, and it feels really weird in my life that I actually now have to worry about PR... [8|] I've been debating whether I should remove my photos from my profile for the same reason, though for now I've decided to leave them and accept what I consider to be a minimal risk. Likewise, I also removed the link to my personal web site from my signature, which was more of a risk (since I know for a fact quite a few people have viewed it doing research on me, from reporters to curious town residents).
Even were it not for my public life, I still would not be comfortable with someone wanting to be active in the porn industry while in a relationship with me. I do not share, so a porn actress would still be a hard limit. I would probably not agree to kinky photo shoots either.
Sorry if I dashed any fantasies Lynnxz [;)]
|
|
|
|
