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Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 1:03:08 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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Estranged Couples

I know for me, I have a rule that whoever I live with will have their own bedroom. I think we all deserve our own space and beds to go to and not be tripping over everyone. Especially in an open poly situation, can't kick someone out of their bed just because you brought someone new for the night or had a long distance partner come for a vacation.

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 1:11:56 PM   
miticantenslaved


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i agree completely...20 of my 25 married years were spent sleeping apart from my spouse because of miti's propensity for sleeping like Mike Tyson...lol

'YOU'RE DEAD,' he said.
Keli waited. She couldn't think of any suitable reply. 'I'm not' lacked a certain style, while 'Is it serious?' seemed somehow too frivolous.
Princess Keli in trouble. [Mort]


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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 1:34:52 PM   
girl4you2


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interesting. my grandparents had separate beds and rooms for all of their married life. seems to work for many.

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 2:17:05 PM   
Chaingang


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I prefer to have at least as many beds as there are people in the household. My own bed is only full sized with drapes and canopy for the light blocking aspect. I like to wake up and not know the time or even what day it is. Should someone sleep with me, it's cozy. When I need my own space and wish to sleep apart, it suits my needs exactly.

I don't like to get sick and I rarely get sick, so if my lover is sick they aren't allowed to sleep with me and I keep my distance from them physically as well - no kissing, I wash after any touching, etc. It seems over the top, but just makes sense really. Otherwise a couple can be reinfecting each other for some time. A separate bed makes sense in these cases as well.

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 2:42:07 PM   
NakedOnMyChain


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Were it completely up to me I wouldn't sleep in a seperate room, but I'd want a much, much bigger bed.

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 3:34:59 PM   
Chaingang


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NakedOnMyChain
...but I'd want a much, much bigger bed.


Some people snore, talk, steal the covers, and even wiggle around too much. Separate is best.

My ex even pissed on the bed once. Well, she can do that in her bed - thank you very much. Bad scene, left a spotted trail of urine on the floor all the way to the bathroom. Her excuse was that I had used her so well that she was literally dead asleep when she realized she had to go and then it was too late to wake up fully. I dunno...


< Message edited by Chaingang -- 1/10/2006 3:38:04 PM >


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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 3:42:53 PM   
girl4you2


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Chaingang

Some people snore, talk, steal the covers, and even wiggle around too much. Separate is best.

My ex even pissed on the bed once. Well, she can do that in her bed - thank you very much. Bad scene, left a spotted trail of urine on the floor all the way to the bathroom. Her excuse was that I had used her so well that she was literally dead asleep when she realized she had to go and then it was too late to wake up fully. I dunno...

dang, Chaingang, first you make 'em sick, then they get incontinent.

naturally, i don't steal covers or even wriggle about much. i just sleep, glorious sleep in a bed....

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 7:11:16 PM   
brightspot


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quote:

I know for me, I have a rule that whoever I live with will have their own bedroom. I think we all deserve our own space and beds to go to and not be tripping over everyone. Especially in an open poly situation, can't kick someone out of their bed just because you brought someone new for the night or had a long distance partner come for a vacation.


MsN and myself whenever we are in the some place, sleep in different beds in different rooms on nights
where she goes to work the next day.
We both know the differences between Sleep and Sex and we use the beds accordingly.
Of course the nights where she doesn't have to work, we love the snuggling and cuddling and sleeping together.


*Brightspot

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 8:02:25 PM   
MsIncognito


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I think this is a lot more common than many people think. If one partner snores, hogs the covers or, as you said, there is a poly situation it seems to make sense. I know of several stable vanilla couples who sleep in seperate beds simply because it's practical.

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 8:12:25 PM   
mystictryst


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I think it's fairly common, however, it isn't something I would be keen on.

My first husband snored like a freight train, it took me months (maybe years) to get used to, but I did eventually learn to sleep through it most nights...

I now share with the cat and dog, that has taken more getting used too than a human partner! They own the bed, tho', and I wouldn't have it any other way.

My grandparents slept in separate beds too, I thought that was normal for a really long time, and for some it is. God knows I sleep better without another human in the bed! *lol*

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 8:28:15 PM   
Quivver


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Shhhhh, you promised not to tell!!!!!



quote:

ORIGINAL: Chaingang

Some people snore, talk, steal the covers, and even wiggle around too much. Separate is best.




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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 9:50:07 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


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I like it as an option rather than a given, and anyone who's been with me as sub/slave knows he may or may not be sleeping in the bed when I'm through with him for the night. M

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/10/2006 10:11:10 PM   
Chaingang


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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
I like it as an option rather than a given...


Yeah, I think I do it that way too - could go either way. Plus as an option sleeping together becomes a special occasion rather than something assumed. I like sleeping with others occasionally, I'm big on spooning and belly holding.

But good rest is so important that no one should have to learn to sleep through snoring, sickness, restlessness or anything else for that matter. Waking rested is the point; not whether I spend my many unconscious hours sleeping with a loved one in close proximity. It's nice, sure - just not the point of sleep.


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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/11/2006 5:33:27 AM   
MysticalPhoenix


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I prefer to sleep alone. Once upon a time, couples sharing a bed and a bedroom was strictly due to economic necessity-anyone who could afford to, slept in separate bedrooms. Somehow that became an ideal of loving coupledom, and eventually an expectation.



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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/11/2006 8:33:29 AM   
ShiftedJewel


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Never could I imagine Scooter and I sleeping in different beds.... Hell, I sleep practically on top of him and he wouldn't have it any other way. And yes, I snore... some nights I wake myself up... and I sleep with my face right next to his ear, how he stands it is beyond me, but he says it doesn't bother him in the least. Not gonna happen... not ever.

Jewel


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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/11/2006 9:45:53 AM   
UtopianRanger


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So does this tie into the supposition that married couples that take separate vacations have better relationships/more fulfilled marriages? HAR~!!

I’ve heard this before, but usually from those that A} Have never been married before or B} take this supposition literally from a crappy role model that may actually be in a state denial.


- The Ranger


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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/11/2006 10:10:04 AM   
ToServeIsToLive


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i recently discovered i can't fall asleep in the same bed as my Domme... Argh, no matter how long i lay there i just never fall asleep...

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/11/2006 7:33:04 PM   
MHOO314


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ShiftedJewel

Never could I imagine Scooter and I sleeping in different beds.... Hell, I sleep practically on top of him and he wouldn't have it any other way. And yes, I snore... some nights I wake myself up... and I sleep with my face right next to his ear, how he stands it is beyond me, but he says it doesn't bother him in the least. Not gonna happen... not ever.

Jewel




I am so there, want to sprawl across My boy---and oh yeah when I wake up and want some--I am NOT walking down the hall and you have to have such a long leash--nope not Me---


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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/11/2006 7:50:38 PM   
Arpig


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Personally I like to find my partner in the bed when I wake up in the middle of the night, so I doubt if seperate beds is really my thing

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RE: Cool Article on Couples Sleeping Apart - 1/11/2006 7:55:36 PM   
Sensualips


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My ex and always slept in the same bed. Sometimes if I was restless or sick or whatever, I would go sleep on the couch out of consideration -- not keep him awake. It really bothered him though, no matter how many times we discussed it and I explained my opinion and reassured him regarding it. I always rather enjoyed it when I traveled for work and got my own hotel room and own bed. YIPPEE! Of course, when we split it was weird to sleep alone night after night after night. I got used to it though, and now I enjoy my space. Protect it, even.

Nice idea about everyone having their own bedroom LA -- until you have short people and they rudely take up rooms in the house. (And then routinely slip into your bed anyway.)

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