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LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Valentine's Day (2/15/2009 10:37:59 AM)
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My Anti Anti Valentines Day Post
For some reason I've been hearing a LOT of negative/anti Valentines Day sentiment, and I don't like it!
First off, it is true that our world is designed for couples. Just as it is designed for morning people. It is much easier/happier/focused/filmy/happy if you are a couple. Put another way, couples have a lot of "privilege" to deal with (winks to Imp).
So there's no real denying that not being in a couple on Vday can be pretty annoying. We've all been there. And it is wrong. A person shouldn't feel less or left out just because they are in a place of not being in a couple. So I totally get that as a single person you're not too happy about becoming suddenly invisible or inferior. That is wrong and I don't support it.
BTW I understand of course that poly relationships are legitimate as couples, but they aren't as accepted or catered to as couples and I've known lots of poly situations that get REALLY dicey on Vday because of the primary couples expectations, so I'm not going into those much. It's just not that germane to this topic.
Main Reason #1 people are against VDay: It's too commercial
Well what is "too commercial?" And why does the world making something "too commercial" somehow make it less happy for me to celebrate? That's the same logic of "Oh everyone's wearing fashion collars, so my collar is meaningless." CRAP!
Yes, it's amusing to see them putting out the VDay decorations the day after Christmas (and they do!). Yes, it's incredible ALL the VDay accoutrements that are available out there, junk to dust and sit and bigger box = more love and pressure to put out through your wallet doesn't make someone feel all swoony about the love bits.
But so what? Are we cows? Does it matter what the world pressures us to do? Does it matter what societal expectations are? DCS and I had our first VDay together watching tv and eating KFC and it was perfect- because it was US together. We saw commercials on the TV, does that make it too commercial?
Main Reason #2 people are against VDay: You should show love and support for your partner all the time
No one can of course argue that that isn't a great idea. And while I will say that the lasting supportive relationships I've seen actually do practice this on a fairly regular basis (you could say they make loving and spoiling a habit), the reality is that a heck of a lot of us do NOT actually take a special time on a regular basis JUST to show the other person that you appreciate and love them for being who they are and with you. A heck of a lot of people SAY they will, but then never get around to actually planning just one night with absolutely no distractions or focus other than loving eachother.
I'm not sure how knowing we're supposed to love eachother all the time negates having one special day to really just toss out anything else and just celebrate the very act and experience of love itself.
Thusly, if you don't like VDay, of course do not celebrate it. It is a choice and like any other should be supported as an expression of self. But make sure it's for the right reasons within you and not some crap "anti establishment" moo-fest.
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