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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 9:58:31 AM   
MissMorrigan


Posts: 2309
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		It's a lovely thing to consider doing. One would presume that to even consider the undertaking of this task you'd have free access to his property? If you don't, then it's moot and you'll have to think of something else. If you do then I suggest dropping into a casual conversation about being his 'maid' for a day and clearing up - just don't specify which day. If he thinks that's a great idea, then go for it, dress up accordingly and take plenty of pictures of you/his apartment at various times throughout the day. My own submissive did this for me one day while I was at work, I came home to find him dressed beautifully and saw that he'd worked his arse off the entire day to clear up our flat (apartment). The pictures he had taken of himself I still have and sometimes look back at them and think, "PHWOARR!"

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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 10:08:21 AM   
MarcEsadrian


Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: unfaithed

As a gift to my Valentine this year, I wanted to give him something he'd really appreciate. I happen to have the day off on Friday, but he has to work. I thought it would be a nice gesture to take care of this for him while he's away so he can finally come home to a nice, clean apartment without feeling like he has so much to do and not enough time. I realized though that there is a possibility he could take offense to this.

How would you feel in this situation?


That's always risky business. It may not seem like it, but slobs often have a system. Stochastic reasoning, I call it. That pile of clothing in the corner there all crumpled up is clean, this pile over here is worn, and so on. It's frustrating for the sane, organized mind, I know, but you might want to give him a choice before you possibly turn his world upside down. Clean his home nude and in a collar while he's home. That's appropriate for Valentines Day, I think.

(in reply to unfaithed)
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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 10:18:19 AM   
MissMorrigan


Posts: 2309
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		That's a very good point to consider, Marc. Professionally, I am an organiser and a neat-freak, to the world that's what I am. My home resembles chaos, my inner rebellion, but it's my chaos. It may seem untidy, with a pile of clothes here and there, a tower of books that perhaps ought to be on the bookshelf, but I know where everything is in that mountain of chaos - they're part of my 'projects' - a reconnaissance of being.

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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 11:19:24 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
~ Fast Reply ~
quote:

Would you be offended or appreciative?

Neither - I'd feel embarrassed.

How it goes from there depends. I may use that reflection of myself to be motivated in the future to not let my personal space get to that same condition again, using your work as a benchmark. I may use it as an opportunity to sit down and chat with the perpetrator and set up some future responsibilities.

Being a touch more than a bit 'AR' with a fetish for organization, details, and neatness; having it pointed out to me that my personal space wasn't up to those standards would only generate one reaction - embarrassment.

But that's just me...

It comes back to how much do you know him. If he is capable and in the past had and preferred an organized, clean living space and his life has been to hectic to maintain it, he may appreciate it. I'm sure I too would thank the person, and beat up myself - not them, for having my 'mess' reach a point of it becoming a 'present' to have it cleaned.

There are a lot of better suggestions and points made here; 'coupons' are always fun - especially the home made versions. Nude and in a collar works even if there is no cleaning necessary.

My only thought that may be worthy to consider is that, personal space is very 'personal'. Make sure it's space you, and the results of your actions, are welcome. Play it out and don't let a very good intent have a very bad result. That can come both from the point that's already been made; "Where did you put my STUFF!"; to "Wow - I didn't realize you thought I was such a pig!"

Only one kind of 'naked' helps. The 'naked' exposure of how he and you really feel about the 'mess' and your influence on it.

Good Luck~!
Happy Valentine's Day!

(in reply to MissMorrigan)
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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 5:38:43 PM   
unfaithed


Posts: 43
Joined: 5/21/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMorrigan

...If he thinks that's a great idea, then go for it, dress up accordingly and take plenty of pictures of you/his apartment at various times throughout the day. My own submissive did this for me one day while I was at work, I came home to find him dressed beautifully and saw that he'd worked his arse off the entire day to clear up our flat (apartment). The pictures he had taken of himself I still have and sometimes look back at them and think, "PHWOARR!"


I had thought about doing that as well, maybe it would soften the blow if he knew I did it scantily clad. :o)

(in reply to MissMorrigan)
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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 6:57:23 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: unfaithed

As a gift to my Valentine this year, I wanted to give him something he'd really appreciate. He has to get up very early in the morning, usually works 10 hour days with another hour spent in the car, so till he gets home at night, he is very tired.  On the weekends either we're spending time together or he is just enjoying his down time.  His apartment though, continues to get dirtier and messier. I know how frustrating it can be for such things to build and build until it seems almost insurmountable and you just don't know where to start. I happen to have the day off on Friday, but he has to work. I thought it would be a nice gesture to take care of this for him while he's away so he can finally come home to a nice, clean apartment without feeling like he has so much to do and not enough time. I realized though that there is a possibility he could take offense to this. I don't want him to think that I find his living space so unbearable that I had to do it myself. I honestly just want to help him, and thought this would be a great way to show him how much I care about him instead of some lame gift.

How would you feel in this situation?

All responses are greatly appreciated! :o)



I would kill for a woman like you (sub or Dom...I be sub).

That is a hell of a gift.

I do not have that skill.  I can go out all day long and make money....it's what I do...but cleaning...it's like someone trying to explain math skills to someone who has none.

Go for it girl...so long as he doesn't mind you in his shit (and no doubt, he doesn't...because he probably doesn't know where his shit is anyway).

You're a gift...and so is what you're proposing.

(Ya got a sister?).



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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 7:01:19 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		If it was me i would be thrilled that someone cleaned up my mess. I'm usually just too busy or lazy after work or hanging out with my friend to want to clean up and if I could afford a maid I'd do it in a hearbeat.

This would be heaven to me but it depends on the personality of your dom. Is he the type that is OCD or hates to see his things moved around? If so he may not like it so much.

Better to ask him or get to know him better first before doing something like that.


(in reply to Lockit)
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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 7:08:29 PM   
samboct


Posts: 1817
Joined: 1/17/2007
Status: offline 		He's already been appreciative of the dishes being cleaned- and it sounds like you've got him pegged with the amount of time he has.  In other words- it's not that cleaning is a low priority- its that job is a higher priority.  Plus it also sounds like you've seen the place when it was clean, and if I read your post correctly- essentially it's gone downhill from lack of time.  This is a very different situation from coming into what looks like chaos and cleaning it up.  I think you're well within bounds to restore something to the order in which you first saw it.  Plus if I saw a woman cleaning up with a cute bare derriere- it'd be a turn on.

Sam

(in reply to littlewonder)
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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 7:14:02 PM   
MstrssScarlet


Posts: 633
Joined: 6/3/2005
From: Indianapolis, Indiana
Status: offline 		You are obviously already spending a lot of time in his apartment, so what's to hide?  I would say go ahead and clean it, but refrain from things like reorganizing the underwear drawer.  Simply vacuuming and dusting is usually welcomed by most anyone.
I once had a friend who's strong point was not keeping her house clean.  Like your dom, she was busy working and trying to raise two kids.  One year for Christmas I hired a professional cleaning service to come in and clean her house for her.  The husband and kids were in on it, but kept it a secret.  She was absolutely thrilled and told me it was the best Christmas present she had ever received.
I say go for it.  As someone else mentioned, let him know you did it in the nude and I have a hard time picturing him getting mad.  You could offer to do it while he's there, but do you guys really want to spend your time that way?  Your together time should be just that - time spent together doing something you BOTH enjoy.
I happen to be very obsessive compulsive myself and the only reason I've turned down offers to clean my house in the past was because I didn't know the person well enough.  You don't have this problem.
Go girl!
Mistress Scarlet

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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 7:19:21 PM   
MasterKalif


Posts: 648
Joined: 5/24/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: aravain

I feel the *exact* opposite on this issue. I would much rather come home to a more 'lived in' space than one that's clean. After I clean I will usually purposefully do something to 'dirty up' the room to make sure that I don't feel uncomfortable when I get home.

When I come home to a clean space it feels sterile, bad. If *something* isn't 'out of place' I'll be uncomfortable in my own home.

Not necessarily saying that the OP's valentine will be, but there *ARE* others who feel this way.



To each their own...I was quoting my personal likes/experience on this, not saying its universal for all Doms.

(in reply to aravain)
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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 7:27:22 PM   
aravain


Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline 		Eh, I was comparing to NJfunCPL's post, not yours.

Actually... you haven't posted in this thread, so how could I be responding to you?

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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 7:29:09 PM   
MissIsis


Posts: 473
Joined: 1/1/2005
Status: offline 		I would love it, so long as my things weren't rearranged.  My sister came to take care of my little ones years ago when I had to stay at the hospital.  I loved coming home to a nice clean house.... Until I opened the cupboards & she had rearranged things.  It was hard to bite my tongue because I was very grateful to her except for that one thing.  I didn't want her feeling anything less than appreciated.  

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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 8:07:06 PM   
MasterKalif


Posts: 648
Joined: 5/24/2004
Status: offline 		well thats my other couples profile...me and my sub girl. That was me writting that...

(in reply to aravain)
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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/11/2009 9:50:50 PM   
aravain


Posts: 1211
Joined: 8/26/2008
Status: offline 		haha, ok, that makes more sense :)

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/12/2009 12:24:55 AM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		For myself, a slave cleaning up the kitchen and throwing out the trash, raking the leaves in the yard and that type of thing is great, go for it.  If s/he wants to start rearranging things then there is going to be a problem because I have the system all worked out and can yes, usually actually find the bills buried on my desk. 

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So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
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(in reply to unfaithed)
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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/12/2009 4:21:44 AM   
barelynangel


Posts: 6233
Status: offline 		If all you are planning to do is the basics -- you could show up before he leaves for work Friday or if you are there get up before he does and put on some cute lil maids outfit that will give him something to imagine all day while you are cleaning and he is working, then you can call him throughout the day and tease him or send him texts or pics of you all day and then have a surprise like a massage and night of pampering when he gets home that is the REAL surprise for him idea.

This way, you will have his reaction BEFORE you do anything and you can have a lot of fun with it during the day grins and you can even if he has anything specific he likes with his laundry or home he would like you do to for him a specific way.  It will still be a surprise and a really cool gift for him, it just then won't be a shock where you have to worry about his reaction.

angel

< Message edited by barelynangel -- 2/12/2009 4:22:56 AM >

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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/12/2009 4:36:39 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: unfaithed

As a gift to my Valentine this year, I wanted to give him something he'd really appreciate. He has to get up very early in the morning, usually works 10 hour days with another hour spent in the car, so till he gets home at night, he is very tired.  On the weekends either we're spending time together or he is just enjoying his down time.  His apartment though, continues to get dirtier and messier. I know how frustrating it can be for such things to build and build until it seems almost insurmountable and you just don't know where to start. I happen to have the day off on Friday, but he has to work. I thought it would be a nice gesture to take care of this for him while he's away so he can finally come home to a nice, clean apartment without feeling like he has so much to do and not enough time. I realized though that there is a possibility he could take offense to this. I don't want him to think that I find his living space so unbearable that I had to do it myself. I honestly just want to help him, and thought this would be a great way to show him how much I care about him instead of some lame gift.

How would you feel in this situation?

All responses are greatly appreciated! :o)



In this situation, where I wasn't sure of his reaction, I'd do grunt work cleaning. Toilets, bathtub, oven/stove, clean out the fridge and dishwasher, wipe down all the cabinet fronts and appliances, vents and things like that which he might not notice but if you're doing it for him and not for you, its worth it. I'd probably stock up the fridge with his favorite beverage as well, something that's tangible that he can notice and, perhaps, appreciate. You can 'clean' without touching his 'stuff'. Win-win. Good luck and let us know how it turns out!


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Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/12/2009 6:02:58 AM   
hejira92


Posts: 2272
Joined: 10/27/2005
From: Palm Beach County, Fl
Status: offline 		I have surprised Master like this several times. He often will leave me in His condo when He goes to work, so there's no issue of getting in (I do have the key now, but not the first time).
 
I did it when He had mentioned He was behind in cleaning and the bathroom/bedroom/kitchen/whatever was getting to Him. I did the deep cleaning- floors, dusting, toilets, mirrors, stoves- and did not reorganize anything. He was thrilled with my surprise. Especially because I am NOT a natural housekeeper. He knew I did out of love and service to HIM.
 
Also, I did let Him know afterward that I was nude while on my knees scrubbing His floor. Just a nice little visual for Him.
 
(I did re-organize His dressers once- but that was with His permission and He approved of all the changes.)

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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/12/2009 6:07:48 AM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hejira92

I have surprised Master like this several times. He often will leave me in His condo when He goes to work, so there's no issue of getting in (I do have the key now, but not the first time).
 
I did it when He had mentioned He was behind in cleaning and the bathroom/bedroom/kitchen/whatever was getting to Him. I did the deep cleaning- floors, dusting, toilets, mirrors, stoves- and did not reorganize anything. He was thrilled with my surprise. Especially because I am NOT a natural housekeeper. He knew I did out of love and service to HIM.
 
Also, I did let Him know afterward that I was nude while on my knees scrubbing His floor. Just a nice little visual for Him.
 
(I did re-organize His dressers once- but that was with His permission and He approved of all the changes.)


Last year after Sir saved some files from a crashed laptop, got another one in my hands within 3 days and reinstalled the crashed computer, i suprised him by going to his place and cleaning it. He was delighted and he said he now could get to other things like organizing. I am not a natural housekeeper either( another me too moment) but do it for him. You have to let the good ones know how special they are.

Isnt it funny how much easier it is to organize someone else than doing it for yourself?



< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 2/12/2009 6:09:22 AM >

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RE: Would you be offended or appreciative? - 2/12/2009 6:31:03 AM   
cjan


Posts: 3513
Joined: 2/21/2008
Status: offline 		I suggest you forego the pleasure you might get from surprising him in the interest of making sure that you know exactly what he considers private and what he might consider intrusive or invasive. Ask him for permission . Tell him it would please you , if it would please him. As some have said, some folks have a method in their messes and don't wish to have someone "move their cheese". I think it's a great idea to offer to do this for him. It's something that I would appreciate more than any purchased gift.

_____________________________

"I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. A bird will fall ,frozen , dead, from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself."- D.H. L

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Profile   Post #: 40
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