Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (Full Version)

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LadyBeckett -> Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/13/2004 9:56:59 AM)

This kinda reminds me of doing the "time warp"...with Janet and whatwashisname? lets do the time warp againnnnn... *does the little foot shuffle*

I am receiving very polite, and well written emails from slaves requesting that I consider accepting them as "on-line slaves". What I'm thinking is that they are finding profiles that seem to be in line with what they are seeking, and the distance is a problem. I normally respond politely and wish them luck in their search, but I'm curious as to what the "success" of these relationships are.



CuriousPuppy -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/13/2004 10:08:44 AM)

I can't remember which thread it was, but about a month or so ago there was a thread where it came up that some use it for trying to determine if someone is wrong and what sort of interests they have. The reasoning was that someone would likely do the things that they enjoy online, and that both would be able to flesh out their limits and icky spots without worrying too much about someone's reaction to doing it in the real world.

Have no idea as to your actual question though :)



Sundew02 -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/13/2004 10:15:37 AM)

LadyBeckett, I agree that distance might be part of their problem. But I would add that the fanasty is more pleasurable to them than reality in many cases. From talking to my Domme friends I have not found any cyber relationships that stand the test of time. For myself I direct them to local D/s groups or if I know someone in their area, to a contact via email. (with the local persons consent) Some have sent me stories filled with severe D/s play. When I have ask have they ever experienced this? The answer was always, well no, but I just know I could for my mistress. Well thats my 'alf pennies worth. Sundew



angelthighhighs -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/13/2004 10:18:59 AM)

whether an online relationship such as this or real life relationships it amounts to the same thing. how much effort, committment and honesty you put into it. there are many that are interested in this lifestyle and either out of real life circumstances or perhaps just sort of checking out the lifestyle from a safe distance before entering into it real life. guarentted online relationships especially with distance is hard to maintain but can be fulfilling if treated with the same respect as a real life relationship would be. of course cyber spanks sorta lose their sting [;)] when i first started in this lifestyle i wasn't sure if it was for me. i entered into an online relationship with a Dom that because of disabilities wasn't able to do real life any more. he had been real life for a few years and missed it dearly, he just wasn't physically able to. we kept the same respect we would have if it was real life meaning...my committment to him didn't end when i turned off the pc. i learned a lot about the lifestyle and about myself thru that experience. he also encouraged me to go to munches and to meet people that were in the lifestyle in real life and to safely experience some of the physical parts of BDSM. when he saw that i was ready to venture out to experience a real life situation...he let me go and encouraged me to grow, to learn, to experience...

there are some subs that are looking more for that mental Dominance to perhaps give them fulfillment instead of the physical and this is a way to get that.

its as anything else...its what you put into it that makes it work or not. of course its not for everyone...which is fine too.



LadyBeckett -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/13/2004 10:53:36 AM)

They have been invited (with my response to them) to put their pennies worth in. We'll see if they do, and what they have to say.



LadyShoshin -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/13/2004 11:37:49 AM)

quote:

For myself I direct them to local D/s groups or if I know someone in their area, to a contact via email. (with the local persons consent) Some have sent me stories filled with severe D/s play. When I have ask have they ever experienced this? The answer was always, well no, but I just know I could for my mistress. Well thats my 'alf pennies worth. Sundew[/color][/size][/font]


I do the same thing, the Janus website has a good listing of groups http://www.soj.org/groups.html
I have had people pop up in IM & try to manipulate me into an online scene, I have become adept at deflecting where they are trying to go with their one handed typing.



iwillserveu -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/13/2004 2:21:02 PM)

M'Lady,

No public comment.[:)] That is unless you want one.[:)]



iwillserveu -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/14/2004 2:18:27 AM)

M'Lady,

In case you don't understand, the above was a joke. I feel no need to post here. (I get my bragging in elsewhere.[;)])

M'Lady has commanded me to provide this link for everyone who thinks that cyber is just so the Domina/Dom can type dirty while the sub types one handed.

http://www.collarme.com/forum/fb.asp?m=24790

I used two hands when typing that freaking sentence. I am using two hands, well fingertips.

Excuse me I have to look up c-o-n-t-u-m-e-l-i-o-u-s.

Here's a link to an online dictionary



iwillserveu -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/14/2004 7:32:03 AM)

Just a test. How many would think this is a real IM

iwillseveu: Thank You for not letting me masturbate. Can you talk dirty to me?

LadyBeckett: no

iwillserveu: how about now?

Lady Beckett: no

iwillserveu: how about now?

Lady Beckett: no



Sinergy -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/14/2004 8:49:10 AM)

quote:

This kinda reminds me of doing the "time warp"...with Janet and whatwashisname? lets do the time warp againnnnn... *does the little foot shuffle*


Its just a jump to the left...

*puts on his Brad costume*

*throws toast at people*

Wait, Im sharing too much again.

Sinergy



LadyBeckett -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/14/2004 9:04:43 AM)

quote:

M'Lady has commanded me to provide this link for everyone who thinks that cyber is just so the Domina/Dom can type dirty while the sub types one handed.


That is not correct. I did, however, tell him to provide the link. Having a long distance D/s relationship, whatever the reason, isn't all fun and games. It's work! And probably more for the Domme (or Master) than for the sub/slave. Everything that is involved in the "relationship" has somehow got to be provided, and the Domme has the unenviable task of figuring out how that is to be accomplished. Once the Domme decides whether or not the sub/slave is worth that time and effort, that is. I mean we're talking the potential for stress here people, and that spells w-r-i-n-k-l-e-s in my book! That's serious! [>:]

quote:

Original: angelthighhighs

there are some subs that are looking more for that mental Dominance to perhaps give them fulfillment instead of the physical and this is a way to get that.


I could not be the "Cyber Mistress" to more than just one, and manage life away from the computer and the phone! iwillserveu is that one. Why in the world these boys seem to think I would be interested in taking on a "cyber crew", I have no clue. I have included a journal entry on the other side that will clarify that for them, hopefully. [;)]

quote:

Original: Sinergy

*puts on his Brad costume*


Of course!!! Brad in a kilt doing the "time warp"!!! Now there's a kodak moment! [;)]

*afterthought: Sinergy in tighty whities!!!! *covers eyes*




Sinergy -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/14/2004 9:06:20 AM)

quote:

Of course!!! Brad in a kilt doing the "time warp"!!! Now there's a kodak moment!


As long as it was done in a Domly manner, I suppose so...

Sinergy



LadyBeckett -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/14/2004 9:11:33 AM)

quote:

As long as it was done in a Domly manner, I suppose so...

Sinergy


But of course!!! [;)]



Laura -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/14/2004 6:07:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: iwillserveu

LadyBeckett: no

iwillserveu: how about now?

Lady Beckett: no

iwillserveu: how about now?

Lady Beckett: no


You better stop before she pulls the car over and makes you walk home. lol



Questing4Aldonza -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/15/2004 6:25:19 AM)

As someone who has recently been through a long distance relationship with a heavy cyber component, I thought I’d put my two cents in.

As Charles Dickens once wrote: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. I was able to get to know and to serve an AMAZING woman whom I would not have even known existed were it not for the net. (Though in my heart I always knew she was out there) But ultimately, I think the fact that she was there and I was here undermined the sense of connection that is so essential for a relationship to endure.

As to specifically “playing” online, in a chat situation, it was never as satisfying as when we interacted on the phone, but it wasn’t exactly bad, either. She had implicit trust that I was doing the things I told her I was doing, and I in turn knew that she was gaining pleasure from that knowledge. And while seeing the words “get the plug” was never the same as hearing them in her honeyed voice, it still made my heart skip a beat regardless.[;)]

Anyway, I agree that such relationships are a lot of work, and can't be as fulfilling as real life interaction, but at the same time I don’t see it as being this inherently odious thing that so many seem to. As desperately as I may wish that things had been different, I will always treasure the time I spent as her prized “slut.”



Questing4Aldonza -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/15/2004 7:15:39 AM)

Oh, and while this may sound flippant, I'm deadly serious when I say my old keyboard get seriously gunked up!

Lipstick and lubricant, mostly. There was very little "one handed typing" as it were.

At least on my end.



katydyd -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/15/2004 12:09:05 PM)

I can't really speak to how a D/s online would work specifically because I've never had one (on the internet I mean). But online can help people meet each other who click. I met my husband online, we wrote lots of letters to one another and an equal amount of time on the phone. However we never had "cyber sex" or phone sex and the hot emails lacked the "hot" part. We were really good friends. And ties were created.

Then we met face to face, the rest is history.

I have a few theories. I think you can create a type of relationship with someone over the internet, and to echo angel's post, you have to put the same energy into that relationship as any other. I'm sure with honesty and trust and a little hard work a D/s dynamic (whatever dynamic you want) could be created.

That being said I sorta have a feeling that a lot of the cyber sex going on is more "choose your own adventure" porn. You're writing a kinky little story with all your fantasies in it AND you have another person who is adding their fantasies in the mix. I'm sure somewhere there's a lovers game with a card that says "write a kinky story together" But it still feels like it's just a story.

That being said if you really feel a bond with the person you're writing a story with maybe your imagination can carry you all the way through so it's wholly real. I think it probably takes a lot more work than real life, and that takes A LOT of work. Just getting to know the persons personality is hard over the internet. But I'm willing to say that someone somewhere can make it work, and be happy. (I hope.)



mistresscece2u -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/15/2004 6:30:42 PM)

Okay here is my fifty cents for what it's worth. I had a couple of online D/s relationships. I found them much more difficult to maintain than r/t relationships. I soon discovered that they weren't for me. Perhaps it was the subs that I was dealing with, ORRRRRR the fact that I didn't feel inclined to put a whole lot of energy into it as there would be little or no chance of us ever meeting. I found that I prefer the hands on approach so that the slaps don't lose their sting .[;)]

But I have noticed an increase in the amount of IMs and emails from submissives that want an online relationship for whatever reason. I have only met two Dommes that have very successful online relationships and one of those will soon be a 24/7 soooo I guess they work but I have yet to experience one that does.

Jes my half dollars worth.



LadyBeckett -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/15/2004 7:15:40 PM)

quote:

But I have noticed an increase in the amount of IMs and emails from submissives that want an online relationship for whatever reason.

As I said earlier in the thread, I invited a couple of the boys that respectfully requested that I consider them as "cyber subs", to contribute to this thread. Obviously they declined. However one of them did respond to me in email, including the additional information that he also has a live-in girlfriend, and doesn't want to pay financial tributes. But he wants a Mistress to totally control him online.

Well sure, I can see how that would work. [&:]



Sundew02 -> RE: Cyber to the right...cyber to the left... (8/15/2004 9:42:36 PM)

quote:

including the additional information that he also has a live-in girlfriend, and doesn't want to pay financial tributes. But he wants a Mistress to totally control him online.



Laughing, Isn't it interesting how the sub/cyber male is offended that anyone would want HIM to put anything more than his sweet ass up. But he wants the Domme to spend hours training him. Mmmmm let's see the Domme works and the male sits and reads. Yeah, thats seem right. Roaring with laughter. Not going to happen. At least not around here. So what did you tell wondersub Beckett? Kiss my gritts? Warm smile, isn't the dance full of interesting slide steps? Sundew



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