RE: What does it matter if.... (Full Version)

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chamberqueen -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 5:09:40 AM)

TPD, you say that you answered ads but you never said what type of responses you got.  Did anyone come out and say "no" and give the reason as your job?  Or is it possible that they either did not respond or they said no and you just assumed it was your financial standing?

A lot of subs get overwhelmed with emails, especially if they are attractive or have an intriguing profile.  I have never looked for casual play, but I would imagine that those who do get even more emails.  We are most likely to respond to emails written in a way that catches our attention and have an interesting profile attached.  While it is good that you are honest I agree with the previous poster that the fact that you have a wife will shut down a lot of those who might otherwise have responded, even if your wife is willing to join.  Even during a play session most subs would like to feel that for that short amount of time they are the true center of your attention and many will have a moral restriction against playing with a married man.

It is easy to blame lack of responsiveness on your economic status, but it could be a myriad of other things.  I look for a man who is stable financially but certainly don't expect him to be rich.  I believe that the same holds true for many other other subs.



Aileen1968 -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 5:14:34 AM)

I wouln't even read your email to me based on your choice of username. It would get deleted unread. First impressions are huge.
Just because someone is looking for a playmate or a casual relationship doesn't mean they don't want an attraction to that person.



ThundersCry -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 5:34:53 AM)

Dude you have a UNIQUE name!
 
They just wanna steal it....
 
However instead of Park I would use Trash...
 
Rock on...



came4U -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 6:45:49 AM)

quote:

why does it matter What he does for a living, what kinda car he has, his home, if he is A model or hung? I'm an Average Joe with a belly, not a Model but dont think I'm a Dog eather.


because it does.

A dominant man (as I have said a gazillion times in here) has a well-balanced dominant personality, character and characteristics.  That incudes climbing ladders for more than shining the siding on his trailer. 

Sure, I have slummed it and met some weenies (not trailer park low, but low) for fucks n giggles but they were lesser or close to equals (nilla).  No one of that calibre could dominante me, so no need to even consider playing with em. 

I couldn't even pretend for 30 seconds to be subservient to some grown man who's highest potential was to live in squallor, not excercize, not own property/car or who uses junk-yard found shag carpetting pieces for bathmats.

I don't care if your screename is Drinkmypissforbreakfast if you have some physical and mental power dynamics going on in the world around ya...I'd change my name to missdrinkshispissforbreakfast.

If I wanted some broke-ass bumm burger flipper material who had a nice cock to fuck me, fine, but dimes to dicks he ain't gonna find out my real name, address or find me ever again.  Sad part is...I'd likely be on top----and I HATE bein' on top. [:'(]



oceanwynds -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 6:59:54 AM)

People have assumptions on how a person will be or not and in internet land or real time land, these assumptions are view through personal appearance, where they live, what they do for a job etc.

Your name says  trailer park, not trailer trash, but trailer trash is mostly assumed by others. I use to live in a very nice trailer park where a lot of intellectual, middle class people lived. They loved the comfort of their dbl wide trailers and the freedom financially it gave them to travel etc. Unfortunately, this side of living in a trailer park is not well known.

I like to know what a person does, not just work wise, but does with their day. Their interest and are they in control of their life. Are they a couch potato or someone who sits at the computer all the time. If so there would be no interest for me, but for others might be their cup of tea. People just want to get to know who you are inside.

Just to play would still hold the same concept for me. If a couch potatoe or watching the monitor all the time, i guilty would find their play boring.

blesssing
oceanwynds



sirsholly -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 7:08:26 AM)

I agree with all those who said your user ID is negative



LaTigresse -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 7:10:38 AM)

AND, remember........it's not like most female submissives have a shortage of male dominants that only want to play.

I am going to guess they have their choice of a few and will select the cream of the crop. Whatever they feel the cream is.



domiguy -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 10:02:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

I wouln't even read your email to me based on your choice of username. It would get deleted unread. First impressions are huge.
Just because someone is looking for a playmate or a casual relationship doesn't mean they don't want an attraction to that person.


I cant believe how closed minded the woman of this site can be!!!!!  I think the op sounds groovy.

If I would have taken the advice I found here I would never have taken the time to find the love of my life.

It will be two years this March and my relationship with "loosewertwat" is still going as strong as ever.



cjan -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 10:31:41 AM)

Trailers in the Florida Keys now  start at about 200k, and that's for a "fixer-upper". Paradise ain't cheap.



OmegaG -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 10:34:56 AM)

FR

Your profile is your resume, would you go send a resume that calls attention to your failings in your professional life?  Do you think that especially in this job market that negative honesty is going to win you any points with employers?  Finding a partner, be it casual or not (and honestly even if I presume an encounter will be play I do keep in the back of my mind that emotions don't always go according to plan therefor the person I play with is the person I can stand to be friends with, maintain a casual relationship or more if that is what evolves).

Anyway, honesty is good but there is both possitive and negative honesty and if you hit someone with negative honesty right off the bat their assumpion is that that is the best you have to offer.  Put your best foot forward and just like if you get called into a job interview, don't offer the negative truths until they are asked for.  People will find out about them soon enough.

And for goodness sakes-- many men at 40 have guts, but most of them sell their personality to others.  When a female likes the man for who he is she can generally over look what he is, but if you hit her with the beer gut before she gets a chance to know any more, she won't take the time.



VeryNastyDom -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 11:04:13 AM)

Let me give you some contrary advice.  Certainly your screen name raises some issues and flags with many people, but  do you want those as your friends or not?  Perhaps toning down the language is sufficient.

I once met a couple on-line, we met for lunch, etc. and generally got along fabulously.  When it was finally the night to meet them, they were extremely shy about telling me they lived in a trailer park because so many people had cut them off over that.  GREAT!!!  Their loss was my gain - I had great times with a that couple of people for many years after that.  If your play partners care that you live in manufactured housing, maybe those are not the keepers.



RedMagic1 -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 11:16:51 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OmegaG
if you hit her with the beer gut before she gets a chance to know any more

Thanks oh so much for that visual, Ms. OmegaG.



OmegaG -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/16/2009 11:22:11 AM)

I may have invented a whole new form of torture.



DesFIP -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/17/2009 9:03:55 AM)

If they need some degree of sexual attractiveness to play with you, even if you aren't having penetrative sex, and your appearance is a turn off, then you aren't a good match.

Beyond that, if sex isn't part of the agenda, then why not look for a sub male for a s & m partner only. There are many sub males who can't find a sadist, who won't look for sexual attractiveness from a het male. But if you focus only on women you are showing that you require some physical chemistry. And if you require it, then why shouldn't they?

More important here is that you are a couple, you are looking for someone who won't be important to you, someone who can't call you if her car doesn't work, if she had a bad day and needs a friend to talk to. Most women require some degree of intimacy before they can trust you with their bodies and you have set it up that this isn't part of the deal.

In this case, go to public dungeons, get a rep of being a safe top and hopefully you will find occasional women wanting to experience single whips, or needle play, or whatever you do better than everyone else and who won't want aftercare or any kind of relationship. Be a service top or be a dom, but don't expect submissiveness in exchange for service topping.



charlie00 -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/18/2009 10:35:28 AM)

oh my god is this one funny, lol. Lots of people saying  " change your user name"  lol. I'd agree with that,  makes me want to ask other to list off terible names,  lol. Tears are in my eyes from laughing,  for a moment I tried to use my mind and come up with a trailer park dom... it wasn't a good picture,  and maybe people are scared of getting invited to the springer  show !!  Those are my thoughts,  and keep an eye on the weather,  tornados may be attracted to you, if no one else is,  lol



MasterOfBabyGirl -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/20/2009 6:17:16 PM)

I agree with most people on this thread.
    As you have already stated, you are changing your profile.  That is step one.  I have also noticed that your spelling leaves something to be desired.  Combined with the name, you already have to work your way up to zero.  Many have said that you should not work yourself out of a hole, and I'll be the next.  I believe spelling is very important all the time, but no time is it more important than when your entire relationship is online.  Mine is not the best, but I do try very hard to make sure it is correct.
    I'm not trying to be demeaning towards you, (I save that for my slave) but truth be told...



slaveluci -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/20/2009 7:45:55 PM)

OP,
You should have used a name like "ShittyApartmentDom" or "SlumdogGhettoDom."  Everyone knows it's fine or maybe even cool to live in either of those places but an f'g TRAILER PARK????  How disgusting![:'(] 

How dare you live in a trailer and think you deserve to find anyone here!  You are human trash, dude.  A trailer?  The horror[image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m28.gif[/image].  AND....you're MARRIED???  OMG, no one married is supposed to be looking here for another to join in[image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m22.gif[/image].

Geesh, how dare you man?

Now, I'll remove tongue from cheek.....all those who believe that shit above can remove their head from ass.......and we can all take a reality check.

Hello, people.  Living in a "trailer park" is not necessarily a negative thing.  If you think it is, you need to look at your prejudices.  It doesn't mean he's poor, ignorant, unintelligent or lesser endowed[8|].  I've know some very well-hung trailer-dwellin' studs myself[8D]. 

The answers here never fail to amaze me when it involves anything to do with trailers.  The same people who will never say "nigger" will spew out "white trash" like it's flowery prose.  [:'(]

luci




lusciouslips19 -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/20/2009 7:51:16 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: SirMIkeSD

I would say they are looking for more then play and move on.

Mike



Well I like them to be educated and smart. But as far as money even if I just want to play, I dont play unless you pay for a good dinner at a nice restaurant, some drinks before gettin busy.



WyldHrt -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/20/2009 10:02:12 PM)

quote:

A dominant man (as I have said a gazillion times in here) has a well-balanced dominant personality, character and characteristics.  That incudes climbing ladders for more than shining the siding on his trailer. 

Sure, I have slummed it and met some weenies (not trailer park low, but low) for fucks n giggles but they were lesser or close to equals (nilla).  No one of that calibre could dominante me, so no need to even consider playing with em. 

I couldn't even pretend for 30 seconds to be subservient to some grown man who's highest potential was to live in squallor, not excercize, not own property/car or who uses junk-yard found shag carpetting pieces for bathmats.

Wow, a rude, assumptive post from you, what a surprise [8|] I won't even get into "broke-ass bumm burger flipper material".

While you are entitled to both your opinion and whatever standards you set for yourself, C4U, that post was downright insulting and done for no reason I can see other than to make yourself feel superior. A bit pathetic, IMO.
BTW, spellcheck is your friend. When trying to be superior, it helps if your post isn't full of spelling errors. 

To the OP- this is a shining example of  what you have been missing, those who make a slew of assumptions based on one or two actual facts. I agree with those who have said that a change of username is in order, and a restructuring of your profile to highlight your positives. That said, you posted that you have a harder time than others that are married and looking for a third, or those subs who are trying to procure a "sister sub" to serve their masters. I really don't think that is the case, as the posts on this forum indicate that there aren't a plethora of subs looking for either of those situations, and the search is often longer than what you face in looking for a simple play partner.

Good luck to you. 




BitaTruble -> RE: What does it matter if.... (2/21/2009 3:41:29 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TrailerParkDom

So why is it important that I have a High end Job a new fancy car and a Big house???


There are a number of possibilities, some of which have already been put forth, but it could be because having a high end job might be seen as someone have the ability to be aggressive in landing that job or tenacious in getting the degrees required to be qualified for that job or even a matter of having the ability  to control their environment and life enough to gain those big bucks .. all or none of which may be true, but it is certainly a possibility and those qualities will appeal to some folks. ~

quote:

Have things changed that much in this lifestlye that its getting like the swing life style where all that matter is how much $$ you got and how Many Inches a man has? I thought it was about a lot more? I thought it was about Control, or how well a Dom knew how to play? How ggod he was at his skill? I guess things on line a Lot Different then Real Life comunity?


No, nothing has changed. It has and no doubt will remain diverse. What appeals is what appeals and different things appeal to different people. Really, it is quite simple. When you advertise on line, no one knows what your true skill sets are, so they have nothing to base a relationship, play or otherwise, on other than superficial first impressions. If that first impression is not enough to capture their attention, most are not likely to give it a chance because they do not want to waste their time on someone who, right off the bat, does not appeal to them. A man who has the big house, fancy car and good job is, quite often, going to be seen as someone who has what it takes to control the life or play session, of someone else, so the trailerpark guys might not get that chance.. even if it is for play rather than a relationship.

quote:

Any subs have insite on this? Any help would be great so I can understand whats going on.


You have already gotten a lot of advice about your screen name, your profile etc., and I would just add that when it comes to play a lot of submissives are going to appreciate a guy with a good mind because plenty of us are really into mind fucks and for those of us who like them, it is important that the fucker have the ability to get into our heads and to do that, we have to believe they have a mind at least equal to our own so, when people say that word usage and spelling counts, it actually does if you want others to believe you are capable of fucking with their heads. [;)]



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