RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress



Message

SlaveBlutarsky -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 12:51:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LAgirlsub

You know, that's a good question because I don't know. I think a few were males, but I hope for example there is one 'woman' on here and I would hope she is a she...but I guess I wouldn't really know if any were who they say they are since they won't meet me in person.

So 'real' domme women - we'll say in general - won't talk sexually right away?
Not with me :( I was hoping this 'Mr Nice Guy' act would get some doing it just to make me uncomfortable, but no, they just want to talk to me and encourage me in my search and crap like that.

You should bottle those messages up and sell them, I'm sure there's good money out there for guys looking to bend the wookie to.



Futuresocks -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 1:55:19 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici

I think you've just added number 11.



<edited to correct Thread name>


I'll tell you why I don't think that's fair--because this is a discussion forum in the "Ask a Mistress" section. I'm merely "asking" a mistress! [sm=highfive.gif] I can, however, understand it being #11 if it comes in PMs all the time.



GoddessTeaze -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 1:57:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Futuresocks

Mistresses...

I'm curious. What are the top five most annoying things that male subs do when making contact with you via email on Collarme? Go for top ten if it fancies you. lol


The Top 10 of anoying things :
  • One liners
  • To tell Me that they are moving in pretty soon [&:]
  • People who can't even write to Whom they are writing this email
  • Or that they can't even write a proper email
  • "subs" with a wishlist, they should b beaten with it !![>:]
  • To lie about how they are poly, but when you get to know them, it shows that they so can't share.[:'(]
  • Those who fly to Holland, and think they can cum by for a quick fix.
  • People who are interested in nothing but their own clit [8|]
  • A sub who asked Me My financial state, because she was going to be sold to Me ?
  • People who ask for 24/7 while I state there never will B such [&o]
There are more people who arent sub out there then there are true subs to B found online is My opinion.

I do wish you enough.

GoddezzT`.







beeble -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 4:46:57 AM)

quote:

GoddessTeaze wrote: * People who can't even write to Whom they are writing this email

Not writing `Dear so-and-so' in an E-mail is just something that a lot of people do.  In the same way that writing `Dear so-and-so' at the top of a paper letter is something that people do.  It wouldn't be reasonable to get annoyed at a paper letter beginning `Dear Goddess Teaze' and say `How dare you say that I'm dear to you? You're a complete stranger -- you don't even know me!'  Writing `Dear' is the normal way of behaving when writing a letter.  Likewise, it isn't reasonable to get annoyed at an E-mail that doesn't begin that way: not writing `Dear so-and-so' is just a normal way of behaving when writing an E-mail.

beeble.



sambamanslilgirl -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 5:19:39 AM)

5 major turn-offs that i find annoying:

1) being too clingy / needy
2) being too desperate
3) controlling the scene (ie i want you to do this ...that and the other to me)
4) expecting an instant meet / play
5) asking for nude pics



frankieboy52 -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 5:34:51 AM)

my most annoying traits???..well i do love to talk about gags too much but i love them which doesn't mean it is right....and another is my por---trait.



GoddessTeaze -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 6:33:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: beeble

quote:

GoddessTeaze wrote: * People who can't even write to Whom they are writing this email

Not writing `Dear so-and-so' in an E-mail is just something that a lot of people do.  In the same way that writing `Dear so-and-so' at the top of a paper letter is something that people do.  It wouldn't be reasonable to get annoyed at a paper letter beginning `Dear Goddess Teaze' and say `How dare you say that I'm dear to you? You're a complete stranger -- you don't even know me!'  Writing `Dear' is the normal way of behaving when writing a letter.  Likewise, it isn't reasonable to get annoyed at an E-mail that doesn't begin that way: not writing `Dear so-and-so' is just a normal way of behaving when writing an E-mail.

beeble.



No beeble, it's not about the word dear,
I don't write dear to people I don't know.
But to not even know WHO you send an email,
and not put My name ontop ???

That's a no go, and impolite to Me.

I wish you a lovely day.

GoddezzT`



LadyPact -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 8:34:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LAgirlsub

I'm almost ready to post my own list on domme emails/replies that might be worthy of a list...(I suppose I should go check the sub forum)...but I'd like to ask - these lists focus on the males that reply to you. How about when a female sub contacts you? What annoys you consistently with women?

I know I don't fit anything on the lists above, especially since as a writer, I write lengthy emails. I don't think I could send a one-liner ever. And since I'm not sure what my do-me list would be, it's unlikely I'm every going to just ask for that. Hum.

I'll go head over to the subs and see if there is a list there...but to the Dommes...why can't you - I mean seriously - just meet in person for a coffee before any sex talk/your laundry list of what you demand? Maybe I do need to start a list...


I'd probably have to say the same thing that annoys Me when it comes to the males.  If you check My prior response on this thread, you may notice that I mentioned that nobody out there is the exception to the rule regarding My preferences.  I happen to be straight.  If I would want a female sub, there would be a lot of things that many people want in a D/s dynamic that just wouldn't be possible with Me.  Most females can respect that, and accept the incompatibility.  It's only the ones who don't that are annoying.





RedMagic1 -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 8:52:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia
to every spammer, scammer, & . . . .. damn, er, I can't think of a good rhyme to complete that triplet, lol

and wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am-er.[;)]



DemonKia -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 12:35:31 PM)

Awesome! I thought someone might have something to contribute to that . . . . . Thanks much, RM1! I've got it in my random prose file now, lol . . . . ..

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia
to every spammer, scammer, & . . . .. damn, er, I can't think of a good rhyme to complete that triplet, lol

and wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am-er.[;)]



SnowRanger -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 3:50:35 PM)

If have noticed that firing up a chainsaw in the middle of the night annoys EVERYBODY!



MissLaura1973 -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 4:02:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LAgirlsub

You know, that's a good question because I don't know. I think a few were males, but I hope for example there is one 'woman' on here and I would hope she is a she...but I guess I wouldn't really know if any were who they say they are since they won't meet me in person.

So 'real' domme women - we'll say in general - won't talk sexually right away?


If someone is unwilling to meet in person (or speak on the phone), then I will write them off fairly fast - they may have perfectly legitimate reasons for being "unavailable," but since I'm only interested in real-time, well, we're obviously not a good match. I usually assume that they are hiding something (gender, location, relationship status, etc.), which may or may not be fair, but I expect openness and honesty in all things - and if a person won't confirm that they are who they claim to be, then I'll not waste my time with them.

As far as "real" dominant women are concerned - heck, I don't know the percentage who will/won't talk about or ask about sex early on. For me, I'm very open about my sexuality/experiences/desires/interests and will discuss them quite readily, when I feel comfortable doing so. I don't know that there's a magic "Okay, so we've exchanged four messages and had two 'Chats' so now we'll talk about sex" equation. Some will want to talk about sex right off the bat, others won't. I certainly wouldn't claim that one who does want to talk about sex early on isn't a twue dominant - we're all different.

I'd encourage voice verification and a meeting with someone that you're interested in ASAP - easier to do so and to make sure that each of you knows who they're dealing with - rather than playing the whole on-line, limited interaction game.

Heck - last week I met a lovely submissive woman for dinner after an exchange of only a couple of messages and one phone call (we skipped the whole "chat" thing altogether). I don't have time to invest in lengthy messages and chats and such - I want reality. (And yes, the dinner went very well *grinning*.)

Go with your gut - go with what you're comfortable with - and if something stinks or feels non-legit, just end things and move on. Life is too damn short to waste it on idiots and players.



SnowRanger -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 4:15:07 PM)

I agree with Miss Laura here.  I like to meet in real time before the chats (or even phone calls) get to hot and heavy.  It is too easy to idealize and fantasize a "chat buddie."  That person is a stranger 'till you meet in person. 

Mike 



DemonKia -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 4:17:58 PM)

Yep, 'physical chemistry' is a real deal-breaker or -clincher, for me ... & can only be determined in person . . . . . .



SnowRanger -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 4:24:24 PM)

Hmm... Chemistry... Hmm... Nitroglycerin plus impact equals....

I suppose that is part of it.  But I want to avoid revealing too much of myself in ones and zeros before meeting.



Politesub53 -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 4:31:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia

Yep, 'physical chemistry' is a real deal-breaker or -clincher, for me ... & can only be determined in person . . . . . .


What about mental chemistry Ma`am ?  This can be established without actually meeting, does it have any effect ?

Im curious, not bratty, okay Im bratty, but not at the moment. [8D]



DemonKia -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 6:51:20 PM)

lol

Under the scenarios we're usually discussing here on CM, there's generally a certain amount of 'mental evaluation' going on via forum postings, cmails, I.M. & so on . ... I know I'm always evaluating everything in my environment . . . .

For me specifically, I absolutely require mental compatibility as the bare minimum for 'connecting', as a foundation upon which to build any kind of 'romantic-sexual-BDSM relationship' . . .. . & most fortunately these here 'intrawebs' are an excellent venue for learning something about 'mental chemistry' . .. . . (Basically, I require that 'supplicants' read lots & lots & lots of my freaking words & continue to be excited about me & evidence some ability to converse with me about my stuff. I am the star of my life & I seek satellites to orbit my greatness, to be really arrogant about the whole thing . . . . Hehehehe)

But I still 'need' to have that in-person contact to 'know' about the other; I'm very 'body language' reliant, & that is so blunted over the 'net & telephone . . . . That's a certain chunk of what I mean by 'physical chemistry' . . . . . There's also that ineffable thing that we mean, I think, when we use the term 'chemistry' in these contexts, & it is important (to me) & only determinable in person (for me) . .. . .



PeonForHer -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 7:07:14 PM)

But I still 'need' to have that in-person contact to 'know' about the other; I'm very 'body language' reliant, & that is so blunted over the 'net & telephone . . . . That's a certain chunk of what I mean by 'physical chemistry' . . . . . There's also that ineffable thing that we mean, I think, when we use the term 'chemistry' in these contexts, & it is important (to me) & only determinable in person (for me) . .. . .

Agreed.  Every feeling produced as a result of what's said online, or by phone, or even by webcam, could so easily be shattered the minute one meets a prospective partner face-to-face.  (Though one could also be pleasantly surprised, admittedly).  I can't allow myself to feel anything as fully real till that meeting's taken place.  There may be any number of things she's not seen beforehand in my photos, read in my writing, or heard in my talking - that make her shudder upon meeting me.  Or vice versa. 



LadyHibiscus -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 7:17:32 PM)

I have to say that I have had the chemistry not happen ONCE.  It was surprising, believe me!  But, passion can be mistaken for warmth all too easily, as I have learned.  I really don't worry about not hitting it off.



LAgirlsub -> RE: 5 Most Annoying Traits (5/4/2009 7:50:17 PM)

Thanks MissLaura - you're absolutely right. I'm done with this endless back and forth in email without some kind of verification. Even on the phone would be a good start. I think you touched on what all those 'hidden' reasons much be.

I lowered my typical defenses (yes my mistake big time) with online interaction because I'm talking to (I hope) domme women and the very first one made all these demands. I thought because of the type of dynamic or power relationship I'm seeking, that I was suppose to accept this behavior. It never felt right and now of course I know better. But just because I do, doesn't mean the other person does. But yes, you're a real domme and you would not continue to dialog with someone online if they wouldn't voice verify or meet in person. That's how I'll handle this going forward.

Now if I can just find local women who feel as you do...



Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4 5   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2024
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.2109375