Sub being Stauked (Full Version)

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bandofthehawk176 -> Sub being Stauked (5/4/2009 8:28:32 PM)

I have a female friend who is a Slave girl. She is being stauked, tormented, and blackmailed By an out of controle dom. What should she do about this. He is a CM member and she really is quite affaid. Any advice?



littlewonder -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/4/2009 8:36:03 PM)

Is this all online? If so....again.....block, delete

If it's offline...she should completely ignore him.

If she can't seem to do that and he still persists...restraining order.



PMnpanthercub -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/4/2009 8:37:21 PM)

stalking is a crime in most states.  are we talking cyber stalking or actual stalking?  save emails and such in cases of cyber stalking, i had this happen many years ago and the emails backed me up.  the person was banned from the sites where he was stalking me. 
as for r/l stalking, documantation is imperative.  times, dates, places, what was said, any threats.  if she's getting phone calls, she can record them.  i've done that too.  you need to get a restraining order and make sure the police are involved in cases of r/l stalking.  good luck.

PM



lovingpet -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/4/2009 8:47:45 PM)

This is a problem for her local law enforcement.  She can also change all her information both online and real time (email addresses, cm and other accounts, phone number, etc.).  It is a start, if this is real time and she is literally being followed everywhere she goes, it is high time for the police to be involved.  She should be keeping a journal of when, where, and what happens each time she observes this occurring for use in court.  She needs means of both deterrent and protection in case she needs it.  A deterrent being something that will buy her time and protection for when the deterrent is no longer effective. 

lovingpet




angelikaJ -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/4/2009 8:55:04 PM)

This website outlines some of the state and federal cyber-stalking laws in case that is her issue.
http://www.haltabuse.org/resources/laws/index.shtml


She can contact her local law enforcement agency.

If he is harassing her in person she can get a restraining order.

If she takes action, she will probably feel much better (less scared).

btw: I much prefer this photo to the one where I can't see your face.



bandofthehawk176 -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/4/2009 9:25:51 PM)

Thank you. i will relay this infirmation and i believe it is mostly cyber-stauk, but he is attempting to blackmail her w old pictures he has/ with information on her profile via sending it to her family/school.



DarkSteven -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/4/2009 9:48:59 PM)

Tell him what the penalties are for blackmail.  Link to them.



windchymes -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/5/2009 5:09:39 AM)

Being afraid of him is what gives him power.  Call his bluff and say "go ahead, they all know about me anyway".  Or, be proactive and talk to the family ahead of time, say something like "We got a little crazy one night and drank too much and he took these awful pictures of me, and now he's threatening to blackmail me with them." etc.  People will sympathize with her and pretty much ignore him.

Most other people have dirty secrets, too.  They've had embarrassing photos taken, done naughty things in their youth.  Chances are, he's just blowing smoke, but if he does actually send them, you will have diffused the situation and he has nowhere to go but jail, because now you have lots of witnesses and proof that he's blackmailing somebody.

Arguing with him, begging and pleading or threatening him will just fuel his fire. 



Mikalsheart -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/5/2009 6:28:46 AM)

I couln't agree more, I was stalked once and as soon as I became "proactive" and took charge, and showed I was NOT afraid....the harassment quit.



DesFIP -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/5/2009 5:48:03 PM)

Contact an attorney, have the attorney accompany her to her local law enforcement to start the legal process. Since he's doing it online as well, contact the FBI also. Instigate civil suit for damages as well.

However a letter from her attorney stating cease and desist or they'll sue for damages usually is sufficient. Hitting people in the pocketbook makes them pay attention.

She needs to tell her family that an ex is stalking her, that apparently he took nude pictures and is threatening to send them around and that it's possible he photoshopped the pics to make them more lurid judging by his threats.



DapperDom30 -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/7/2009 5:59:15 PM)

If she truly fears for her safety, contact local law enforcement!  Generally, she would not need legal counsel to initiate a Temporary Restraining Order (TRO), although I always advice to have counsel present.  The TRO can be issued ex parte (without the other party present), but will not be enforced until the restrained person has been served.  Generally, once a TRO has been issued, a hearing can be scheduled to show cause for a permanent restraining order. 

Blackmail could be prosecuted under both state and federal law.  Again, if she fears for her safety, contact local law enforcement.

As far as recording phone conversations, please be aware that recording a conversation without the consent of the other party is a crime in several states. Some of these states, but not all, make exceptions for such recordings when made if the individual is threatened with violence or extortion. Check your state law, don’t make a bad situation worse.

When in doubt, contact local law enforcement or seek legal counsel.



chamberqueen -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/9/2009 6:50:40 AM)

I was a victim of a cyberstalker and had to pull my profile from CM.  He contacted people in my friends list and stirred up a lot of problems.  I ended up closing my Yahoo email account and having to start another.  It progressed to a harassing phone call which was much more frightening to me than the online portion even though he stirred up more than his fair share of trouble that way.  (I have since moved though I know that is not a viable option for many in a situation like this.)

I read a great article on cyberbullying.  It takes all of their fun away if you simply never respond.  They are basically doing it for attention and if they get none they get no satisfaction.  A person like this thrives on discontent and may go to unbelievable lengths to get it.  Take away their perceived power over you by totally ignoring them and the game is no longer fun for them.  (I know, it is extremely hard not to want to fight back against unfair accusations but any type of response at all only feeds them.)



emy33 -> RE: Sub being Stauked (5/9/2009 8:37:06 PM)

I thought you and your friend might find this helpfull.  Here is the number the national center for victims of crime 1800-394-2255. They have resorces that help people deal with stalking and cyber stalking is still stalking. There is also the website for the Stalking Resource Center- www.ncvc.org/src.  It gives you an idea of different federal laws etc. in place for stalking. At the federal level it is mandated that each state has to have stalking laws in place.  Your friend needs to go to the police and inform them on what is going on and discuss what her next step should be.  Just another FYI  stalking statistics for the year 2008 and I'll have to look up from which resorce the statistics came from but 1 out of 12 women will be stalked in someway within her lifetime and 1 out of 45 men.. It's really not something to play around with or hesitate on.

Emy



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