To the woman that crapped in my car

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

To the woman that crapped in my car

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> To the woman that crapped in my car

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

To the woman that crapped in my car - 6/8/2009 2:05:02 PM

janiebelle

Posts: 332
Joined: 4/29/2009
Status: offline

To the woman that crapped in my car… -

I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.

I thought we had chemistry sitting at McMenamins sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Terminator Stout. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.

At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don’t feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said “First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me” was meant to be funny, not offensive.

I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle’s lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don’t think anyone wins 100% of the time. That’s why they call it “gambling”. I’m the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better…like when you’re not sitting on a heated leather seat…

What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.

I await your call, Tad

P.S. - If you shat yourself on purpose to end the evening early…Touché…

***Got this in an email...don't know the validity of it but funny as hell....

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: To the woman that crapped in my car - 6/8/2009 2:06:07 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Okay, I should not laugh at this kind of thing. But I do!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to janiebelle)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: To the woman that crapped in my car - 6/8/2009 2:06:46 PM

Asherdelampyr

Posts: 9556
Joined: 11/14/2006
From: The Desert
Status: offline

LMAO
who cares about validity, that is awesome anyway

_____________________________

Pirate King,

The nicest man you'll ever bleed for

Posting Help

Vitam Piratae Eligo

The Rainmaker

(in reply to janiebelle)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: To the woman that crapped in my car - 6/8/2009 3:00:44 PM

ShaharThorne

Posts: 11071
Joined: 2/24/2009
From: Somewhere in TX
Status: offline

Oh Lords...sounds like something my brother would send me!

*checks her email just in case*

_____________________________

Goddess of Yarn

You are making two and a half feet of irresistible, tubular sex! -Lola, Kinky Boots

Founder: Bitch with Tits

Whip me, beat me, make me feel cheap and have great sex

(in reply to Asherdelampyr)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: To the woman that crapped in my car - 6/8/2009 3:42:19 PM

mydestiny2043

Posts: 714
Joined: 10/15/2005
From: Southern California
Status: offline

_____________________________

Fate determines who will come into your life...................
You decide who stays,and who goes !!!!

(in reply to ShaharThorne)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: To the woman that crapped in my car - 6/8/2009 5:32:00 PM

Marc2b

Posts: 6660
Joined: 8/7/2006
Status: offline

I never EVER gamble on a dubious fart and that's why! If I have the slightest doubt I take it to the bathroom.

So when does the sequel come out? Does she go out with him again?

_____________________________

Do you know what the most awesome thing about being an Atheist is? You're not required to hate anybody!

(in reply to janiebelle)

Profile

Post #: 6