Idiot sightings (Full Version)

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DDraigeuraid -> Idiot sightings (6/14/2009 10:59:09 AM)

IDIOT SIGHTING:We had to have the garage door repaired.  The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.  I thought for a minute and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.  He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.  He said, 'NO, it's not.  Four is larger than two.' We haven't used Sears repair since.  IDIOT SIGHTING:My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window, and I gave the clerk a $5 bill.  Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.  She said, 'You gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes, I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.' She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request.  I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said, 'We're sorry, but we cannot do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change. Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.  IDIOT SIGHTING:I live in a semi-rural area.  We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.  The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!  I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.' IDIOT SIGHTING:My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce. IDIOT  SIGHTING :I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'  IDIOT SIGHTING:The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.  I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine.  She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.  I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.  Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?'  IDIOT SIGHTING:At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker (she was leaving the company due to 'downsizing') our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun.  We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken.  We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.  IDIOT SIGHTING:I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself, and for the sake of her life couldn't understand why her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff's office, no less.   IDIOT SIGHTING:When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it.  We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door.  As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.  'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply, 'I know.  I already got that side.' They walk among us...  They REPRODUCE, and scariest of all..  They VOTE!!




hlen5 -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/14/2009 11:07:15 AM)

Loved the deer crossing one!!




FourQ -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/14/2009 12:28:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DDraigeuraid
They walk among us...  They REPRODUCE, and scariest of all..  They VOTE!!

Not only do they vote but they have an uncanny knack of getting voted into American politics as well.




tsatske -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/14/2009 5:19:05 PM)

When my children (now grown) were small, I managed to burn our house (trailor) down. Basicly leaving a charred shell.
Our insurance company was non-responsive, and we were poor. The red cross directed us to the local family mission - me, hubby, and 4 children under the age of three. Using the missions office phone, we called the insurance company isesantly until an answering service FINALLY called us back. Get that, They called Us - at the number I left, 'wayside mission', and someone answered the phone with 'wayside mission', then found us and called me to the phone.
I told her that our house was burnt and we needed an adjuster, and we needed a hotel voucher, as well.
The woman said, 'We don't ask adjusters to come make estimates on a weekend, unless the house is unlivable'

With surprising presence of mind for a 19 year old, I answered, 'Oh, no, the house is fine. We came to Wayside mission for a nice vacation with the kids. I mean, we were considering Disney Land, but this seemed so much more educational.'




Steponme73 -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/14/2009 6:09:57 PM)

I was going to comment that these sound like our elected officials in congress....




mydestiny2043 -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/15/2009 9:26:57 AM)

[sm=alien.gif]lmbo




Termyn8or -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/15/2009 10:32:52 AM)

"I was going to comment that these sound like our elected officials in congress.... "

There is a "joke" just like that from a travel agent who dealt with politicians. Probably unsnopable, probably unverifiable, but could be true. IIRC one politician wanted to save money by taking a bus to Hawaii.

T




Saratov -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/16/2009 4:37:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tsatske

When my children (now grown) were small, I managed to burn our house (trailor) down. Basicly leaving a charred shell.
Our insurance company was non-responsive, and we were poor. The red cross directed us to the local family mission - me, hubby, and 4 children under the age of three. Using the missions office phone, we called the insurance company isesantly until an answering service FINALLY called us back. Get that, They called Us - at the number I left, 'wayside mission', and someone answered the phone with 'wayside mission', then found us and called me to the phone.
I told her that our house was burnt and we needed an adjuster, and we needed a hotel voucher, as well.
The woman said, 'We don't ask adjusters to come make estimates on a weekend, unless the house is unlivable'

With surprising presence of mind for a 19 year old, I answered, 'Oh, no, the house is fine. We came to Wayside mission for a nice vacation with the kids. I mean, we were considering Disney Land, but this seemed so much more educational.'



And these folks are in positions of athority and power in many of the various companies involving peoples lives. [:-]




DDraigeuraid -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/16/2009 8:44:35 PM)

quote:

"I was going to comment that these sound like our elected officials in congress.... "

There is a "joke" just like that from a travel agent who dealt with politicians. Probably unsnopable, probably unverifiable, but could be true. IIRC one politician wanted to save money by taking a bus to Hawaii.

T


What's the problem?  Just take the tunnel from Long Beach.  LOL  Was talking to a sub?? a while ago who wanted to know if she could drive here to Hawaii.  I told her to take the tunnel, then quit talking to her...if she was a her.

Dragon 




LKN4SIS -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/17/2009 1:09:39 PM)

ya'll quit pickin on Hillary!




stella41b -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/17/2009 1:25:05 PM)

I was with a friend in a park when I called her attention to a dead pigeon. 'Where?' she asked, looking up to the sky.




tsatske -> RE: Idiot sightings (6/17/2009 5:45:37 PM)

I'm telling you, They Walk Amongst Us.




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