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A good profile - 6/30/2009 7:13:11 AM

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Joined: 6/30/2009
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I was wondering if I could get some advice on writing a good profile, describing myself and my interests without it seeming that I was in any way trying to tell a Dom what she should want to do.Its a bit of a dilemma it seems because you can either say I want to be this that and the other and make it too general or you can say what really excites me is being tied naked to a tree and having my body hair shaved and then get people upset for being too forward.
Any advice would be gratefully recieved.

< Message edited by Boy2feminise -- 6/30/2009 7:15:28 AM >

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 7:27:20 AM

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Just be you ... fetishes aside.. most women are interested in who you are as a total person...thats the best advice I can give.

_____________________________

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Being a women is hard work Maya Angelou

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 7:33:15 AM

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Good advice, I shall try that.

(in reply to Sylverdawn)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 7:54:14 AM

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This is a topic that comes up regularly. You can try searching some of the archives for many, many responses. The advice above is absolutely true, however, I'd like to add a few more details. I'll post Cliff Notes because I don't have much time this morning. :)

Realize there are those who Pursue, and those that like to be Pursued. This is not gender or orientation specific.

Submission is not a passive activity. The path to getting your needs met, is through service and dedication, and patience. Creating an environment where your partner feels loved and valued, and 'safe' to be Herself, is more likely to have Her interested in keeping you around. It IS possible for a submissive to integrate himself and become a most valued addition to Her life.

Keeping these things in mind, a valuable partner is one who is balanced and grounded and able to be present and connected. You'll be inspired by Her as a person, as feelings of submission in the beginning are not 'forced'. (general statement - I'm sure there are some Amazon types running around, but they are not the norm.)

Determine what kind of connection you would be open to, and let things progress naturally without trying to make yourself fit someone else, or Her 'fit' you.

Read other profiles and make notes to yourself about what you like, admire, or dislike, and then write yours accordingly.

Sthrn

PS. If you do write to a Domina, while you can have a bit of the introduction that you copy/paste, make sure you personalize it, AFTER HAVING READ HER COMPLETE PROFILE. Explain why you think you might be compatible, from the perspective of how you could be the person she's seeking.

_____________________________

Sthrn
Honorably served by OttersSwim

'The sign of a developed mind is one in which two opposing ideas can coexist' - Oscar Wilde.

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 8:01:03 AM

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Thats all good advice thank you I shall bear that in mind. I suppose on forums like this its easy to give the wrong impression, some people who see a naked boy in his photo might make some assumptions about him, and they could well be right ha ha ;-)

(in reply to SthrnCom4t)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 8:17:10 AM

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personally, I think the fact that you are asking this question, recognizing that there are some profiles that aren't going to appeal to any but scammers, speaks well of you :) Good luck!!

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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 8:17:40 AM

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I can recommend to you that you examine your profile and look for "johnny-one-note" disease. That one note is typically about their kink - be it crossdressing, anal, pee, or what have you. It becomes obvious pretty quick the ones that are looking for a "relationship" with a dominant female, and those that are looking to have a dominant service "their needs". This last, of course, turns away many dominant Ladies who are not looking to satisfy someone's kink, but want a male who will focus on them and their needs, desires, and wants in the context of various types of relationships with D/s as its foundation.

As my Lady (Sthrncom4t) said in Her post above, a submissive most often gets their needs met when they meet the needs of the dominant and inspire said dominant to want to meet their needs in turn.

So realize that while you can indeed say what you want in your profile, if you couch it in your overall goals for how you want to integrate and have a relationship (again, many kinds) with a domina, and don't make it all about your specific kink, you will have a better chance at drawing someone to you who is interested in similar interests.

While it is kink...it is really just like vanilla dating life - you gotta woo the girl, say the right things, and mean it.

Hope that helps! :)

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 8:59:42 AM

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I wrote this as my introduction, its honest I think maybe needs tuning a bit

Student from Birmingham, looking for a dominant woman to feminise me, teach me to dress and act like a real girl and to use me as her willing slave as she sees fit.
I don't want to talk about my needs too much here, apart from saying feminisation,public humilation and suitable punishment when I deserve it are the things that drive me, and the need to belong to someone who understands these needs.
I am willing to learn, I am only just begining to understand what it all means myself and why I have these needs and desires so if I can find someone who is willing to explore my limits with me then that would be my ideal partner
As far as my limits are concerned I would say as long as it doesn't result in me being permanantly scarred or arrested too often then I will try it.
Thanks for reading.
Peace

It doesn't read well in places but I will work on it.

(in reply to OttersSwim)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 9:02:28 AM

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talk more about what you have to offer HER.. what you can do to make her life more pleasant, what kind of skills you can bring to the table. Talk about vanilla interests. Give a picture of WHO you are (as a person) not just WHAT you are (as a submissive).

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 9:04:59 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boy2feminise

I don't want to talk about my needs too much here,

But that's all you talk about: fetish, sex and play.

Are you a photographer? Why do you like it? What is the best photo you have ever taken? Why?

General question to answer: what do you do with yourself when you are not obsessed with getting your freak on?

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 9:14:52 AM

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Okay give me a moment.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 9:20:43 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boy2feminise

..... being permanantly scarred or arrested too often then I will try it.
Thanks for reading.
Peace

It doesn't read well in places but I will work on it.

...everyone seems to be overlooking the fact that his fantasies are totally unrealistic and illegal.

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 9:47:25 AM

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Illegal?
Not really sure how its illegal, I live in england where adults are allowed to have concentual sex as to it being unrealistic, it maybe that but I live in hope that it's not.
Anyway unrealistic as it may be here is my new new profile.
I am a little annoyed by your comment AAKasha I don't know about you but I haven't needed permission from the police to have sex before.
.
Student from Birmingham, looking for a dominant woman to feminise me, teach me to dress and act like a real girl and to use me as her willing slave as she sees fit.

I have a strange sense of humor I am told which sometimes gets me into trouble when it goes over peoples heads.

I am unconventional in outlook I think most people would say,quite often the centre of attention, not loud but I amuse people without meaning to sometimes.

I am interested in what can be called 'Fortean' subjects,
Forteans have the idea that science sometimes doesn't have all the answers because some things are easier to ignore, sometimes things happen which science doesn't have an answer for because they don't fit into existing theories.The idea is we need to be able to examine evidence and come to rational conclusions without always being constrained by conventional thought.

I am very active in the local cycling club where I have just started doing some road races with a little success, its interesting because there is a lot of suffering involved in cycle racing and someone said to me that success in cycling is 10% technique and 90% being able to endure physical suffering.Using the pain to take you somewhere else.

I don't want to talk about my needs too much here, apart from saying feminisation,public humilation and suitable punishment when I deserve it are the things that drive me, and the need to belong to someone who understands these needs.
I am willing to learn, I am only just begining to understand what it all means myself and why I have these needs and desires so if I can find someone who is willing to explore my limits with me then that would be my ideal partner
As far as my limits are concerned I would say as long as it doesn't result in me being permanantly scarred or arrested too often then I will try it.

Thanks for reading.

< Message edited by Boy2feminise -- 6/30/2009 9:48:21 AM >

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 9:51:21 AM

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

much better :)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 10:06:35 AM

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Joined: 11/27/2004
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quote:

hat really excites me is being tied naked to a tree and having my body hair shaved and then get people upset for being too forward.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Boy2feminise

Illegal?
Not really sure how its illegal, I live in england where adults are allowed to have concentual sex as to it being unrealistic, it maybe that but I live in hope that it's not.
Anyway unrealistic as it may be here is my new new profile.
I am a little annoyed by your comment AAKasha I don't know about you but I haven't needed permission from the police to have sex before.
.

YOU used the terms "being arrested too much." How many times getting arrested would be "too much"? And if you are arrested, it would suggest you are doing something against the law, or perceived to be against the law. What did I misunderstand?

Akasha

< Message edited by AAkasha -- 6/30/2009 10:07:30 AM >

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 10:20:19 AM

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It was meant to be a joke. An allusion to doing things that might startle the horses and offend the neibours, with a bit of luck ;-)
Like I said I have a strange sense of humor.

< Message edited by Boy2feminise -- 6/30/2009 10:22:45 AM >

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 10:23:46 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boy2feminise

It was meant to be a joke. An allusion to doing things that might startle the horses and offend the neibours, with a bit of luck ;-)

Your first post alluded also to the 'fantasy' of offending people. You have to realize at the core this is unethical. While it is exciting to you to feel embarrassed by offending others who express disgust or shock by you, it ultimately requires the participation of an unwilling participant. There are safer and more ethical ways to explore humiliation, but once you involve the unwilling public and require their being "offended," you require they are negatively impacted by your sexual games. Not very fair.

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 10:26:21 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Boy2feminise

It was meant to be a joke. An allusion to doing things that might startle the horses and offend the neibours, with a bit of luck ;-)
Like I said I have a strange sense of humor.

I got that and thought it was cute and worth a light chuckle. I don't know about others, but a little sense of humor is usually enough to get me interested.

_____________________________

"To love another person is to see the face of God."

(in reply to Boy2feminise)

RE: A good profile - 6/30/2009 10:27:09 AM

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Again it was a joke, in the future I will indicate when my faulty sense of humor has kicked in like this 'JOKE' and then we won't have to get upset with each other.
Sometimes over analysing something on forums causes all kinds of misunderstandings I find.

< Message edited by Boy2feminise -- 6/30/2009 10:28:35 AM >

(in reply to AAkasha)

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