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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 2:22:45 PM

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slutslave4u

Whether lifestyle or vanilla...why should it matter to anyone what the age differences may or may not be? As long as the two of you are very happy in what you have and share in and with each other, that is all that should matter, nothing more.....enjoy!

The problem tends to be a sociological one and depends greatly to your location and country in which you reside. The UK, Europe, USA, Asia and Middle east tend to either be more understanding and forgiving about a larger age difference as well is various cultures traditionally it was expected a young bride would marry an older and established man. Other countries such as mine (Australia) tend to not only look down on such marriages but in a good number of areas of social activity even actively act against such couples as Neets and I found out when we were bared from membership and made most unwelcome in some establishments. Mind you as far as I am concerned, those people and establishments have been proven unworthy of our company and the loss is theirs.

quote:

ORIGINAL: olena

My husband/master was thirty-three years older then me and left me a lonely widow at thirty-five. I would do anything for more years to be together even if that meant never finding love again.

I entered into the relationship knowing I would if all things normal would out live him by many years, that was not his problem or responsibility but only mine. I would hope my husband would tell God that my crying is a testament to the love they have for each other and how just unselfish he must be for her to love him so much.

Such a pity that a good many people here in Aussie can't be enlightened as you.. You sound so much like Neets, my wife, in this.

It's a matter of double standards here. If a man of my age marries a lass of Neets's age it is disgusting and selfish and yet if a lady of 64 marries a 34 year old man she is toasted with champagne. Must be a maths things with 34 goes into 64 better than 64 going into 34..

< Message edited by IronBear -- 7/11/2009 2:27:31 PM >

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 2:28:39 PM

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: olena

My husband/master was thirty-three years older then me and left me a lonely widow at thirty-five. I would do anything for more years to be together even if that meant never finding love again.

I entered into the relationship knowing I would if all things normal would out live him by many years, that was not his problem or responsibility but only mine. I would hope my husband would tell God that my crying is a testament to the love they have for each other and how just unselfish he must be for her to love him so much.

I was younger than 18 when I met my late husband; two days after my 18th birthday, I moved in with him. Like you, I would gladly have given anything for more time with him; but, it was not meant to be. I knew going in though that chances were very, very high, that he would pass long before I did and it was a risk that I would take again if given the chance.

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 2:49:12 PM

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
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quote:

What is your response and why

yeah... how dare I die and live here in luxury while the poor girl suffers in loneliness without me. Maybe you should send me back to be with her for being so selfish.

It's a long shot... but just maybe !!!

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to justme1980)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 2:59:28 PM

Posts: 278
Joined: 3/26/2004
From: Missoula Montana
Status: offline

Would she feel any less sad, if the Master she lost was her own age? None of us knows the number of our days.

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"Come to the edge," he said.
They said, "We are afraid."
"Come to the edge," he said.
They came. He pushed them. And they flew.
~Guillaume Apollinaire

(in reply to justme1980)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 3:00:46 PM

ishyB

Posts: 555
Joined: 9/2/2008
Status: offline

Greetings justme,

Master and Mistress are 'only' 20 years older then me.

I've actually feared about the very thing you asked about on many occasions when I felt I was falling for him, but in the end, I think there is only one reasonable way to look at the whole dilemma: 'Do I give up my happiness right now, because of the sorrow that might befall me in the future?'
I guess every person that ever fell in love with a person older than themselves knew what their answer was to that one...

I wish you well,

ishy

< Message edited by ishyB -- 7/11/2009 3:01:31 PM >

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Someone's gotta go
and I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I wanted to move on
So I'm already gone

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 3:58:17 PM

Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
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My Sir is 11 years older than me, in somewhat dicey health, and if he died tomorrow, I would be heartbroken - and thankful that i had the years with him that i did.
For one thing, he restored to me the faith that there are men who love and appreciate women, and not build their own egos at the expense of the one that they are supposed to love.

As for Saint Peter - i would have Sir gently point out to him that his boss had already ok'ed his entrance - and it wasn't for St. Peter to question the decision.

(in reply to ishyB)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 4:19:45 PM

Posts: 1073
Joined: 5/4/2008
From: Tempe, AZ
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

Your a late 40's early 50's dom who has managed to snag a hot 30 year old slave. so you spend the next 25 years together and, well, you kick the bucket. so you are at the perly gates and Saint Peter motions you over and he says"look down" so you look down and you see your now 55 plus year old slave, crying out of loniness. St peters looks at you and says" Looks like you were alittle selfish wern't you?
What is your response and why

Not a very plausible scenario, to be honest. As a late 40's, early 50's dom, I fully expect to snag a hot 19 year old slave, spend the next 10 years together, and then transition her to someone with whom she can happily spend the rest of her life with. And then, at age 60, I fully expect to do it again, but this time with a 'back up' plan in place in case I die early. If someone is going to grow so attached to me that my passing will devastate them, it's my full responsibility to provide them a social environment where they can withstand that.

(in reply to justme1980)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 4:37:10 PM

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

I am 36 and Sir is 59, yes at any time either one of us could die. I cherish the time we have and not worry about when death will come. 5, 10, 15+ years of happiness is better than a lifetime of nothing, I wouldn't trade that for anything.

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 4:43:40 PM

Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

What is your response and why

What's the matter Peter - never enjoyed yourself? Never fucked a younger woman without a pang of guilt? 'Bout time you lightened up mate. She's a grown woman - she's not wet behind the ears.

Because Peter is too busy passing judgement instead of enjoying himself.

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 5:17:19 PM

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Joined: 6/20/2009
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I havent read the rest.

My first real love died at age 36. i was 30.

What has age got to do with anything??

(in reply to justme1980)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 5:35:36 PM

Posts: 14412
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GrizzlyBear

Would she feel any less sad, if the Master she lost was her own age? None of us knows the number of our days.

Bingo!

I have a friend was two years younger than her Dom. One night her 46 year old Dom died. I doubt that her pain was any less than someone who was 20 years younger than their deceased partner.

I pray that Master and I have 25 years of happiness. A 25 year old relationship where both parties still love each other is a major blessing.

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 5:59:35 PM

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Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

Sir and I are roughly the same age, but if He were older I'd hope He'd answer that "With me she knew love like no other, and that's better than never having known that kind of kind of love at all. Now she knows what to look for and she's young enough to do it again with someone else." I don't believe believe in the whole heaven/hell thing, I believe in reincarnation and would hope that someday, somehow, our spirits would meet again.

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In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to justme1980)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 6:11:18 PM

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Shit by that logic nobody should ever have kids, because eventually we die and they'll have to mourn for us. And nobody should ever love someone the same age, because the majority of men die first and the woman will be alone after many years together not knowing how to live by herself after 60 years together.

What bizarreness is this? Not to mention that the hot 30 year old after 25 years isn't hot and young anymore and yet is still in love with a man who still loves her. Love is rare and precious, at any time and any age. If you can make it last, then treasure every day because 28 year olds die of cancer, 45 year olds get hit by a bus, etc. The only time you have together is today.

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 7:02:07 PM

Posts: 69
Joined: 6/22/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

Your a late 40's early 50's dom who has managed to snag a hot 30 year old slave. so you spend the next 25 years together and, well, you kick the bucket. so you are at the perly gates and Saint Peter motions you over and he says"look down" so you look down and you see your now 55 plus year old slave, crying out of loniness. St peters looks at you and says" Looks like you were alittle selfish wern't you?
What is your response and why

You seem to be implying that the sub either isn't smart enough to realize that the dom is probably going to die long before they do, or doesn't have the backbone to find another dom if that's an issue for them. Either way... I don't think you'll get many subs.

(in reply to justme1980)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 7:28:53 PM

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Status: offline

My old man is only 16 years older than me, we just hit 24 years together.... I wouldnt change one minute of the love I have felt for him and from him. Not ONE minute.

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 7:51:05 PM

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Joined: 6/17/2008
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Master is 20 years older than me, I don't think he's selfish for collaring me. I went into this relationship knowing, A) he may very likely die first B) He has diabetes so that may increase his chances of dying first and C) That I will very likely have to nurse him and care for him as he gets older.

I thought long and hard about it and figured that it was more than worth it. Any time we have together is good, and it's important just to make sure each day is special. Besides I told him he's not allowed to die until I can go with him, and we all know how well Master's listen lol, if he does go first he'll go with all my love and hopes that he's able to find peace knowing that he'll be waiting for me with a flogger in one hand and his other arm open for a hug.

(in reply to justme1980)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 8:18:55 PM

Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline

FR, after skim thru

OP, there are no guarantees of anything.

My ex died in Dec, age 35, unexpectedly & with no warning, just a dead body all of a sudden. He was 8 years younger than me, & one of the attractions that younger persons have had for me is trying to dodge exactly what happened, having a loved one die on me, one of my worst fears.

No guarantees.

& yeah, it's changed how I view this issue . . . . .

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/11/2009 8:27:18 PM

Arpig

Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline

Despite the cute poem to the contrary, love is very very selfish.

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RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/12/2009 4:20:03 AM

Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DemonKia

FR, after skim thru

OP, there are no guarantees of anything.

My ex died in Dec, age 35, unexpectedly & with no warning, just a dead body all of a sudden. He was 8 years younger than me, & one of the attractions that younger persons have had for me is trying to dodge exactly what happened, having a loved one die on me, one of my worst fears.

No guarantees.

& yeah, it's changed how I view this issue . . . . .

I am truly sorry for your loss

(in reply to DemonKia)

RE: young sub/older Dom - 7/12/2009 4:24:21 AM

Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: autoRelease

quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

Your a late 40's early 50's dom who has managed to snag a hot 30 year old slave. so you spend the next 25 years together and, well, you kick the bucket. so you are at the perly gates and Saint Peter motions you over and he says"look down" so you look down and you see your now 55 plus year old slave, crying out of loniness. St peters looks at you and says" Looks like you were alittle selfish wern't you?
What is your response and why

You seem to be implying that the sub either isn't smart enough to realize that the dom is probably going to die long before they do, or doesn't have the backbone to find another dom if that's an issue for them. Either way... I don't think you'll get many subs.

It is not about smarts, it is after a 20 year union, what future man or person could ever fill those shoes

(in reply to autoRelease)

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