18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong

18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (Full Version)

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DedicatedDom40 -> 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/14/2009 4:52:37 AM)
http://www.knoxnews.com/news/2009/jul/13/wife-given-18-months-sex-game-death-husband/ Gotta love those reader comments!

Sunnyfey -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/14/2009 5:48:22 AM)
Damnit that pisses me off. WHY DON'T PEOPLE READ A GODDAMNED ANATOMY BOOK OR GOD FORBID FUCKING RESEARCH SOMETHING BEFORE THEY GET INTO RISKY SEX GAMES!!!

tazzygirl -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/14/2009 9:26:08 AM)
Many use sites like this as research. Recently, and i cant find the thread, someone (female) was asking about needles into scrotums... and all i kept thinking was... do you have experience.. a medical background.. before you start playing in an area like that? some people truly dont think before trying things.

GYPZYQUEEN -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/14/2009 10:16:54 AM)
OP: This was a needless death.. She should get the same thing.. GQ

JuliaGreenleaf -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/14/2009 12:23:22 PM)
Oops. This is why i ask so many questions, if anyone is reading my profile and interested.

LilKittenSub -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/19/2009 4:22:23 PM)
And that is why even when I was in 24/7, if my Master left the apartment without me, I was always given a way to get myself out of whatever bonds or cage or anything I was put into, just incase something should happen.

SoulPiercer -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/19/2009 4:39:51 PM)
Given the circumstances, how did she convince anyone it was a sex game gone bad and not premeditated murder?

amaidiamond -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/19/2009 5:35:53 PM)
Oh dear god, some people I have no issues with long periods of bondage, if I have a safety Out option but bound with no out and gagged....geeeze

slavekal -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/25/2009 5:56:10 AM)
Bondage 101 is you don't bind and gag a person, then leave them alone. How idiotic. Safety first. Always.

Leonidas -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/25/2009 9:46:56 AM)
All I can say is that it's a damn good thing for her that there is no National Organization for Men. If there were, I'm sure they'd be calling for a federal investigation, and additional charges for violating his civil rights.

DemonKia -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/25/2009 2:54:31 PM)
FR, after read thru The teacher at a recent bondage class I attended, who is also a forensic expert in BDSM & worked as such on this case, discussed it during the class. The couple were into cuckolding, had done this scenario before. What she said was, he always got loose before. The implication being that her bondage skills had gotten better . . . . . FYI . . .. . My experience is that, BDSM or not, lots of people regularly engage in all kinds of non-survival behaviors that have low immediate risk but substantial long-term / cumulative risk & get away with it. (Tobacco use, speeding, driving while exhausted or intoxicated or distracted, etc.) & it stems from & breeds a certain cock-eyed perspective on risk-taking . . . . . & then I see this in real-life BDSM contexts by people who think of themselves as informed. For instance, came back from that bondage class where the teacher had made a point of the danger of using a knife as an emergency bondage release, & there was a posting on one of our local groups bragging about a knife demonstration they'd hosted & talking about how handy the knives would be to have as emergency bondage release. No clue as to the safety issues . . . . . What I really find interesting about these cases where BDSM activities go awry & the police & courts get involved is the distancing that happens by the BDSM 'community'. Generally the posting of these stories seem to be accompanied by a bunch of 'oh, they're not one of us' kinda psychological & rhetorical mechanisms. That's sad, to me . . . . . .

barelynangel -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/25/2009 6:08:23 PM)
quote: The teacher at a recent bondage class I attended, who is also a forensic expert in BDSM & worked as such on this case, discussed it during the class. Hi, just out of curiosity, he as an expert is bound by confidentiality until the trial is completely concluded including any and all appeals, i believe, how was he talking about this case and discuss it in a class he was teaching prior to this woman even being sentenced? angel

ThatDaveGuy69 -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/25/2009 6:34:04 PM)
This may be a dumb question, but WTF is "a forensic expert in BDSM". Can I get a degree in that? I don't think it's offered at my local ju-co... And another dumber question: If the indictment was for 2nd degree murder, how is it that Mrs Bargy can be convicted of anything else? Can you really be charged with 2 different crimes for the same -specific- act? Can an idictment really say "you are changed with 2nd-degree murder AND negligent homicide?". Seems to me the DA should have to decide what charge to go with and stick with it. Although it might have been a plea-bargain - there's no mention of an actual trial. ~Dave ~Dave

DemonKia -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/25/2009 11:14:39 PM)
Angel: As a criminal trial proceeds most everything brought out in open court is a matter of public record, so I don't think he was betraying any confidences. The journalists just don't get into all those little details in their short pieces . .. . . & specifically, the prosecutorial end of the case has to reveal all their findings to the defense before the case goes to trial, including police interview transcripts. I suspect that that particular bit came from the initial police interviews & was thus available to the public fairly early in the whole thing . . . . . . Dave: He's a lawyer, & is a qualified forensic expert in BDSM, especially erotic asphyxia issues. Forensic experts are those allowed by the court to testify in their area of expertise, & typically the most important skill set, outside of whatever technical specialty they have (psychiatry, CSI-type stuff like blood spatter or composition, coroners / medical examiners, anthropologists, etc) is that they have a fairly detailed understanding of the law. In his case, courts (ie, judges, who are the ones to make those decisions, ultimately) have accepted his expertise in BDSM issues . . . . . & the courts need experts on BDSM because apparently 'it was consensual kink play' gets used a lot as an excuse by all kinds of defendants & the courts have found need for experts to explain the intricacies of the BDSM subculture, experts who are well versed in how the law works. & as to how the journalist explained the charges, yeah, well, I'd like the journalists to get the technical details right a lot more than they do -- I suspect that your question has way more to do with that journalist being confused or misunderstanding those details than anything else . . . . .

RealGirl4One -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/25/2009 11:16:22 PM)
She deserves the sentence she got, if not more. She should count her blessings she doesn't hang.

fadedshadow -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/27/2009 5:27:10 AM)
sucks for the dead husband guy

BoiJen -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/27/2009 5:31:41 AM)
what people seem to have a hard time understanding is that suffocation doesn't just happen because people don't get any air. Suffocation happens because people don't get enough air. The husband may have gotten some air for a while, may have been alive for 18 hours, but in the end his lungs could not suck enough air to sustain his need for O2. Just sayin... boi

BoiJen -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/27/2009 5:43:13 AM)
DemonKia, Those of us in the know happen to know exactly who the "expert" is in almost any situation that requires one on SM. He's a very knowledgeable guy, but not one I would want involved in any case in which individuals played in any kind of extreme manner. He's a safety nut, with good reason, that goes much farther with safety than most of us do and does so in a way that is limiting to the play that most of us do. And it's likely because of his job. I feel that because of this, his testimony could be damaging in any accidental injury or death case where reasonable safety precautions were taken and Darwin won anyway. As a legal note, pleading down happens all the time. Changes of the actual charge happen as well when the information starts to flow and the prosecution realizes they may have a weak case for the criteria of the original charge. 2nd degree murder has to show intent to kill. Negligent homicide does not. If they can't prove her intent to kill her husband, then they need to build a stronger case for negligent homicide if they are to convict her at all. It's a matter of court motions and paperwork really. As for the expert testimony, as long as there is not a gag order issued or these individuals are not meeting with the judge, jury, or opposing counsel in the trial, they are allowed to discuss details as much as they want. The legal system does not bar open discussion to the media or educational atmospheres so long as there is not a judicial order forcing silence (which only applies to the current trial not any appeals) and there is no undue influence to any of the major players in the trial. The jury will be (has been) instructed not to view any media coverage of the current trial or to disregard any media coverage they may see that pertains to the case at hand. And that is standard. boi

DemonKia -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/27/2009 4:07:16 PM)
Yep, I'm sure plenty knew who I was alluding to . . .. & given that he's a somewhat controversial figure, for exactly the reasons you give, I felt that I'd just stick to adding into this thread what factual info I'd gleaned that seemed pertinent. I guess I did leave out one factual bit that now seems relevant: he was hired by the defense. He almost always is. He seemed to view his job as working to get plea bargains for manslaughter, murder 2, or anything less than a murder 1 conviction, where it's appropriate . . . . . . As for more speculative matters, I suspect he was a 'safety nut' long before he was gettin' paid serious dollars by defense teams for his forensic expertise . .. . . Unless you were referencing his early work as an EMT . . .. . quote: ORIGINAL: BoiJen DemonKia, Those of us in the know happen to know exactly who the "expert" is in almost any situation that requires one on SM. He's a very knowledgeable guy, but not one I would want involved in any case in which individuals played in any kind of extreme manner. He's a safety nut, with good reason, that goes much farther with safety than most of us do and does so in a way that is limiting to the play that most of us do. And it's likely because of his job. I feel that because of this, his testimony could be damaging in any accidental injury or death case where reasonable safety precautions were taken and Darwin won anyway. As a legal note, pleading down happens all the time. Changes of the actual charge happen as well when the information starts to flow and the prosecution realizes they may have a weak case for the criteria of the original charge. 2nd degree murder has to show intent to kill. Negligent homicide does not. If they can't prove her intent to kill her husband, then they need to build a stronger case for negligent homicide if they are to convict her at all. It's a matter of court motions and paperwork really. As for the expert testimony, as long as there is not a gag order issued or these individuals are not meeting with the judge, jury, or opposing counsel in the trial, they are allowed to discuss details as much as they want. The legal system does not bar open discussion to the media or educational atmospheres so long as there is not a judicial order forcing silence (which only applies to the current trial not any appeals) and there is no undue influence to any of the major players in the trial. The jury will be (has been) instructed not to view any media coverage of the current trial or to disregard any media coverage they may see that pertains to the case at hand. And that is standard. boi

GaPhoto -> RE: 18 mos in jail for sex-game gone wrong (7/27/2009 9:23:22 PM)
If you are referring to whom I think you are then yes, I agree that he has a tendency to allow the safety issues to detract from the play. I've read his books, and I try to not recommend them to brand new people, because they can scare one off if they do not know to selectively take advice, rather than believing everything told or read. Based on the VERY limited facts provided, perhaps negligent homicide was an appropriate conviction. However I hope someone hit her on the back of the head just to remind her what a dumbass she really is. Zack

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