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'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/18/2006 11:50:10 AM

seattlescrtsqrl

Posts: 1
Joined: 12/23/2005
Status: offline

Hello all, and thank you for being here to answer questions

I am a slave girl owned by a very nice couple in a training relationship and it's time now for me to go look for my one.

I am curious about how how potential Masters for me may react to the expectation that if we talk a little and think there is a connection that there is an expectation of communicating with the current owners about (for lack of a better word) courting me?

My gut reaction is that the right one will understand, even appreciate the seriousness with which I accept my obligations and the respect that I accord my Master and Mistress. But I am curious to hear *your* thoughts.

Thank you for your kind attention and I look forward to hearing your input.

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/18/2006 12:05:52 PM

Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

I have been a Protector and am now a Mentor/Protector to two female submissives---as long as you let Them know up front, any good Dom will understand--if not--too bad.

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/18/2006 1:12:04 PM

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

Hi and welcome to the Forums.... This is solely *my* opinion and probably not representative of the broader D/s spectrum.

As one who's only ever interested in a monogamous D/s (or M/s) relationship, the prospect of having to go through a third party is a deal-breaker. To my mind, as long as you're freely addressing someone else 'Master' or 'Mistress', you're not ready to move on. No matter what your reasons, to me it'd just sound too messy and complicated and I'd sooner look elsewhere (despite all that gorgeous red hair you have.... lol)

Different story if you described them as friends or lifestyle acquaintances who looked out for you etc because I'm all for fem/subs having a Dom friend to seek advice from. But I just won't get involved if I have to actually talk to you through that person or have to "measure up" to their ideals. As far as I'm concerned, I've got all that covered and I don't have to prove myself to anyone save the person I'd have a relationship with. Your profile says you're 34, not 14, and I'd expect any sub of mine (real or potential) to be able to speak for herself.

So, yes, I'll understand if you have someone to watch over you - FROM A DISTANCE....!

Focus.

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/18/2006 2:36:24 PM

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

If you are truly "owned" by the ones who are training you then i would think you would need your release before pursuing others, unless you are planning to be involved in a poly relationship. If they are mentors then i would think they would help you in your search, and it would not require their permission to contact others. JMHO

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/18/2006 4:03:13 PM

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: seattlescrtsqrl

Hello all, and thank you for being here to answer questions

I am a slave girl owned by a very nice couple in a training relationship and it's time now for me to go look for my one.

I am curious about how how potential Masters for me may react to the expectation that if we talk a little and think there is a connection that there is an expectation of communicating with the current owners about (for lack of a better word) courting me?

My gut reaction is that the right one will understand, even appreciate the seriousness with which I accept my obligations and the respect that I accord my Master and Mistress. But I am curious to hear *your* thoughts.

Thank you for your kind attention and I look forward to hearing your input.

I note that your profile is awaiting approval at the time I checked so this maybe a moot point. But frankly, from my point of view, if the situation where made clear up front (As in mentioned in the profile) then if I where interested in the person I would have no problems with doing so in the slightest.

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/18/2006 5:01:22 PM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: seattlescrtsqrl
My gut reaction is that the right one will understand, even appreciate the seriousness with which I accept my obligations and the respect that I accord my Master and Mistress. But I am curious to hear *your* thoughts.

You probably already know this, but go with your gut.

You currently enjoy a structured BDSM relationship, and the "one" (I personally hate that term) that will work for you will not only understand that relationship and its responsibilities, but will respect and admire the core of your submission. If they do not, they will never be right for you in the long run.

In reality, what you have given yourself is a "filter." Those who have difficulty contacting your current owners are better pushed aside with as little effort as possible anyway. I would recommend really sitting down and thinking of a few other filters (I have many, and would be happy to explain in more detail with examples if you would like).

In this case, you've already eliminated Focus 50, so I think it is a very good filter, indeed. *smile*

You are a pretty girl, and will have little difficulty finding a good match.

Taggard

< Message edited by TallDarkAndWitty -- 2/18/2006 5:02:47 PM >

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/18/2006 8:07:24 PM

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TallDarkAndWitty

In this case, you've already eliminated Focus 50, so I think it is a very good filter, indeed. *smile*

Taggard

Geeez mate, you've messed with me twice previously and got bitten both times - just how many times ya gotta "poke the bear" before a lesson is learnt?

But back to the topic - and my first response.... Since you obviously couldn't comprehend, yours truly eliminated himself, which kinda negates the use of any filters in my case, don'tcha think? Duhhh.... lol

Focus.

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/19/2006 1:58:35 AM

Posts: 231
Joined: 10/22/2005
From: South Dakota
Status: offline

I do see the other points made about currently being owned. And i can understand what has been said about being released. My personal feelings would be that if the connection were to be made, then if it felt right, why worry about being vetted by another, at least in this respect. Perhaps it is a bit of flattery, that one would ask another about myself. And on the flip side i can see how it might annoy someone. There is the major point tho, of the connection, if it is indeed truly there, why should anything matter?

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/19/2006 3:21:00 AM

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

After reading your profile, I rewrote my response to this. Your profile is very up front and honest about what you expect and the position of your owners in your life. If you keep your standards high, it may take a very long time to find a Dom/Master, whether you call them mentors or owners. You're not only looking to find someone whose idea of the lifestyle fits yours, but has chemistry with you and the same life goals as you. Be patient. As someone who has found, collared and married her sub, I tell you it can and does happen.

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/19/2006 8:58:33 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
Geeez mate, you've messed with me twice previously and got bitten both times - just how many times ya gotta "poke the bear" before a lesson is learnt?

Sense of humor...look into it.

*smile*

quote:

But back to the topic - and my first response.... Since you obviously couldn't comprehend, yours truly eliminated himself, which kinda negates the use of any filters in my case, don'tcha think? Duhhh.... lol

Actually, the best filters work that way. You were eliminated without ever having bothered the girl.

Taggard

< Message edited by TallDarkAndWitty -- 2/19/2006 8:59:57 AM >

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to Focus50)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/19/2006 9:51:22 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

If I lived in Australia, I wouldn't want a filter that eliminated Focus...(that filter would be mal-functioning I think)

Intelligent, well-spoken, thoughtful....yeah...terrible qualities in a domly one...

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/19/2006 5:05:47 PM

TallDarkAndWitty

Posts: 1893
Joined: 6/12/2004
From: Rochester, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

If I lived in Australia, I wouldn't want a filter that eliminated Focus...(that filter would be mal-functioning I think)

Obviously your filters would eliminate someone like me and keep someone like him, if they worked.

That's what finding the right match is all about.

Taggard

_____________________________

A most rewarding compliment is an insult from the ill-informed.

My slave: Kat (RainaVerene on the other side) and her website: RainaVerene.com

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/19/2006 10:05:36 PM

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

Always said you where a sensible lass with good taste Blushes

(in reply to TallDarkAndWitty)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/19/2006 10:08:24 PM

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: seattlescrtsqrl
I am curious about how how potential Masters for me may react to the expectation that if we talk a little and think there is a connection that there is an expectation of communicating with the current owners about (for lack of a better word) courting me?

My gut reaction is that the right one will understand, even appreciate the seriousness with which I accept my obligations and the respect that I accord my Master and Mistress. But I am curious to hear *your* thoughts.

Thank you for your kind attention and I look forward to hearing your input.[/font]

You're exactly correct. It's your responsibility to be open, honest, and respectful about any limitations or obgliations you have within your life- whether it's to be home by 9 for the babysitter, or to not have any fisting done without someone else present.

People who fit can be free to see what chemistry exists or not. People who don't fit are free to (and should) thank you for your honesty and move on.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/19/2006 10:09:29 PM

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Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: proudsub

If you are truly "owned" by the ones who are training you then i would think you would need your release before pursuing others, unless you are planning to be involved in a poly relationship. If they are mentors then i would think they would help you in your search, and it would not require their permission to contact others. JMHO

Lots of owned slaves are free to play and date with others.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to proudsub)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/20/2006 2:20:37 AM

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

If I lived in Australia, I wouldn't want a filter that eliminated Focus...(that filter would be mal-functioning I think)

Intelligent, well-spoken, thoughtful....yeah...terrible qualities in a domly one...

Now you've got me blushing - good onya!

And they are appreciated qualities for anyone to have; Dom and sub alike. Qualities that even Taggard agrees would eliminate himself in your own filtering process.... *wink*

Focus.

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/20/2006 10:08:51 AM

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Uhm...my filters would have kept both of ya, actually...

hotties...smart...well-spoken...funny...doms....I AM picky...but...you guys are awesome!

*kisses to Taggard* and *kisses to Focus*

(in reply to Focus50)

RE: 'Dating' protocols when owned - 2/20/2006 11:19:14 AM

Posts: 172
Joined: 7/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

But I am curious to hear *your* thoughts.

Reasonable expectation!

quote:

I am a slave girl owned by a very nice couple in a training relationship

Taining relationship .....is a definite positive!

quote:

appreciate the seriousness with which I accept my obligations and the respect that I accord my Master and Mistress

Speaks well of you and should indeed be appreciated.

quote:

there is an expectation of communicating with the current owners

Benefits all concerned...why not.

Good luck on your continued journey

Sartoris

_____________________________

Oh, the shark, babe, has such teeth, dear
And it shows them pearly white
Just a jackknife has old MacHeath, babe
And he keeps it … ah … out of sight.

(in reply to seattlescrtsqrl)

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