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RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/26/2009 2:15:12 PM

jeninvegas

Posts: 79
Joined: 6/11/2009
Status: offline

It's definitely the endorphin rush, haha. Well, that comes after the pain, I guess, or possibly during the infliction too.

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Post #: 21

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/26/2009 2:42:02 PM

shadowowl

Posts: 198
Joined: 5/31/2004
Status: offline

Pain provides focus weather it is kink or not it's a way to attain clarity of thought. My mind is often very busy and chaotic so it's rare to have real moments of quiet where there is a single focus. It's a mixture of that and the pure domination effect.

(in reply to jeninvegas)

Post #: 22

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/26/2009 3:15:42 PM

SassySarijane

Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subjoe101

Pain is one thing I never understood.

I cringed watching it. I don't get it? Why would anyone subject themselves to the pain?

I can only answer from my own experience and perspective. I am a masochist. I really enjoy impact play with hands, paddles, floggers, straps, whips, and most variants thereof. Most of the sensations I get from the various implements do not translate as pain to me. They feel good. They are pleasurable and not in a sexual way, though can go that way also. Some strikes and implements do translate as pain or partially as pain, but it is a good kind of pain.

Probably the simplest explanation is that some people are just wired to feel it as pleasure rather than pain or to like the pain rather than hate or fear it.

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Post #: 23

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/26/2009 7:31:34 PM

GildTheLily

Posts: 19
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline

I always liked this quote from Kushiel's Dart:

"Pain obliterates everything else. In pain, there is only the eternal present."

(in reply to SassySarijane)

Post #: 24

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/26/2009 8:21:07 PM

cpK69

Posts: 1593
Joined: 5/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GildTheLily

I always liked this quote from Kushiel's Dart:

"Pain obliterates everything else. In pain, there is only the eternal present."

Hadn't heard of it before... I like.

Kim

_____________________________

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(in reply to GildTheLily)

Post #: 25

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/27/2009 3:49:08 AM

lally2

Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline

the thing is, i can watch something like that and it does nothing for me atall, cept i did quite like her shoes and her body harness.

heres the thing i think. for me anyway. i can submit to pain but it has to be to my Master, the person who has my submission. otherwise the pain just registers as an unpleasant ordeal. with my Master i am pleasing him and the pain becomes much easier to process and handle.

watching something like that is going to make you think wtf - in my early days on the internet a guy sent me a pic of a womans bum, brick red and welted and i freaking panicked.

lost in the moment, being taken care of by someone who values their property and cares about you and you have a whole different set of feelings going on that are far far removed from a set up scene on and for the internet.

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Post #: 26

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/27/2009 7:53:47 AM

OttersSwim

Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline

I am NOT a natural masochist. I write this post from the perspective of a submissive in a loving power exchange relationship with his Dominant Lady.

Pain is a process...pain is a vehicle...pain is a connection...

Pain is a process - when the blow lands, few people are immediately excited or happy about it. It frickin hurts. The process begins in processing each blow from the initial sting/thud/poke/burn/puncture and you breathe through the fire of your nerves reacting to it. It subsides into heat, or dull ache, or numbness and the next blow lands and you process that. Blow upon blow are like threads put together and before you know it, your scene has woven a tapestry of sensation in pain - an overall experience that you have gone through with someone else. Process continues after the session with aftercare where emotion may well up, into the next day/days when you process the overall experience into a "perspective". That perspective has never been negative, at least for me. While the sensation at the time was unpleasant, the overall experience was very pleasant. Read on to find out why.

Pain is a vehicle - You and your Dominant are on a journey together. When you scene, you both drive, and you both are passengers. The trip you take together is punctuated by sensation given by the Dominant and received by you. In that sense, the Dominant is driving...but your reaction drives the Dominant too. Pain is also a vehicle in the sense of what it delivers to you both - endorphins, bliss, emotion, connection, excitement, fear, rage, tranquility...the pain drives you both to a destination. In my experience it has been one of endorphin rushed emotional release followed by intense tranquility and deep connection with my Dominant.

Pain is connection - it begins with trust. I am trusting my Dominant enough to take me on a journey; to watch me and understand where I am at at all points in that journey; enough to know how to proceed, and even if to proceed. They receive my trust and in turn are trusting me to give myself over to the journey, to provide feedback, and use the sensation that they give me as a channel to connection with them. My reactions in turn, provides a channel for connection in Her. We both feed from the sensation - and it is not just pain. Pain is only part of the overall experience. Our play is very sensual and sexual and the pain creates connections to sexual energy and arrousal in both of us (more for Her than for me as of this writing, but I am evolving). I suffer for Her, I endure for Her - that is an expression of my love. She hurts me as a means to express Her love for me. She needs to hurt me, I need to be hurt. The exchange of power in relationship creates incredible connection.

Um...so yea. At the time, it hurts and unless I am really ramped up, is not usually pleasant. But it is not the pain that is important here - it is the process, the journey, and the connection that it creates in a power exchange relationship that is what it's really about.

My perspective.

< Message edited by OttersSwim -- 8/27/2009 8:02:28 AM >

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Post #: 27

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/27/2009 7:56:15 AM

OttersSwim

Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline

Oops, posted it twice..

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Post #: 28

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/27/2009 9:02:00 AM

maia09

Posts: 113
Joined: 6/10/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subjoe101

Pain is one thing I never understood. When I watched the video below, I thought the first half was very hot. You could see the sexual energy and arousal in the sub. However in the second half she got a good beating and was in pain. I cringed watching it. I don't get it? Why would anyone subject themselves to the pain?

http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=87e90381d8f20278c647

i had no problem watching the video - particularly because the male dom was such a poor actor. Also the sub made no real connection with the D's. So regardless of what she was feeling or what they want us to think she was feeling, i felt rather flat watching it. For me it's not about pain. It's not pain that i find exciting, it's more the ritual of it, the submission, surrender to my Master for His pleasure, His use in whatever fashion He wishes. i agree with another post here about how i fantasize about pain beforehand and can find it erotic afterward as well. But during the session, i'm busy just trying to process it and the only thing that makes me able to deal with pain is knowing it pleases Master. Otherwise - heh - no thankin' you. lol. Great post.

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(in reply to subjoe101)

Post #: 29

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/27/2009 11:14:41 AM

nailgirl

Posts: 27
Joined: 4/27/2007
Status: offline

ive seen this vid b4. look at her butt..... any marks .....NO maybe its a little fake ... who knows

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Post #: 30

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/27/2009 11:19:46 AM

BoundDragon

Posts: 265
Joined: 3/20/2007
Status: offline

Yes pain for me does give a rush of excitement but that is only a small part of it. It really does push me to an entirely different level where senses are hightened and another state of consciousness is entered.

OOooooooooo... yummy, just thinking about it gives me goosebumps

(in reply to nailgirl)

Post #: 31

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/29/2009 4:11:32 AM

subjoe101

Posts: 17
Joined: 8/3/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lally2

the thing is, i can watch something like that and it does nothing for me atall, cept i did quite like her shoes and her body harness.

heres the thing i think. for me anyway. i can submit to pain but it has to be to my Master, the person who has my submission. otherwise the pain just registers as an unpleasant ordeal. with my Master i am pleasing him and the pain becomes much easier to process and handle.

watching something like that is going to make you think wtf - in my early days on the internet a guy sent me a pic of a womans bum, brick red and welted and i freaking panicked.

lost in the moment, being taken care of by someone who values their property and cares about you and you have a whole different set of feelings going on that are far far removed from a set up scene on and for the internet.

lally - you make a very interesting point. Watching the video I was flinching, but being a participant in the situation would be a whole different perspective that would probably result in different emotions. Many people have commented that there is more to it than just pain. The power-dynamic, trust, and relationship between the sub and master all add to the excitement. Clearly there is more to it, than what you see. Another poster MAIA, mentioned that there seemed to be no connection between the master and sub. Perhaps this was just a video to make money (a painful way to make money for the girl).

(in reply to lally2)

Post #: 32

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/29/2009 10:48:05 AM

dreamerdreaming

Posts: 2839
Status: offline

I'm not surprised you wouldn't "get it", from watching a scene that is so obviously staged porn- made to be sold. Duh.
That kind of thing is a million miles away from what a real owner/slave experience is about. There's no real emotion in it, even acted. The two doms have more of a rapport with each other, than with the sub. Its fake.

To understand the beauty and the sweetness of real torture, you'd hafta view, or take part in, real torture, between people who have actual relationships. Or you'd hafta see some porn that could much more accurately portray that. Porn that could convey the emotional feelings (versus just the tactile aspects) between the dom and submissive.

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Post #: 33

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/29/2009 10:59:59 PM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Why would anyone subject themselves to the pain?

This is not a sub. It is a porn actress with breast implants, in a commercial production she got paid for. No sexual energy, no arousal, no pain, just bull, and $$$s.

(in reply to subjoe101)

Post #: 34

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/30/2009 7:11:06 AM

spookyfe

Posts: 74
Status: offline

i love pain i get of big time on it and can climax just from it. not found my limit yet but master deepens slowly. i also need pain it calms me i feeel relaxed i cope and deal with the worlld with a smile. luckily he loves giving it and the control he has over me.

(in reply to antipode)

Post #: 35

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/30/2009 9:01:31 AM

cpK69

Posts: 1593
Joined: 5/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ive seen this vid b4. look at her butt..... any marks .....NO maybe its a little fake ... who knows

I already have D/s experience; therefore, I do not need to see an actual D/s couple in action, in order to gain a visual perspective of an activity.

Visual perspective is all I need to come up with my own lil’ scenario, involving Sir and I; and ‘mine’ is always better, for me.

Kim

< Message edited by cpK69 -- 8/30/2009 9:02:08 AM >

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Post #: 36

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/30/2009 9:22:56 AM

utahSteelsandi

Posts: 63
Joined: 2/14/2009
From: St George Utah
Status: offline

ottersSwim said it perfectly.

when Sir first hit me with a flogger, it brought back memories of my mother beating me and i cried. it was not the best experience. then Sir taught me of the process, to push past the sting and focus on the warmth. i love every bit of our play time now. i don't know if i would enjoy it as much from any othe Top, Sir knows how i like things and is fond of pushing my boundries.

watching this video turned me on heavily, although i don't particularly like bastinado (caneing the feet) or small canes for that matter, it seemed like she was really getting off on that whole scene. i remembered all those times when i wish i could touch myself durring a beating even though i wanted to sooooo bad. i don't know if this gave you any insight i just felt the need to voice my opinion on the subject.

andi

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Post #: 37

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/30/2009 9:29:21 AM

GoddessImaginos

Posts: 1493
Joined: 8/5/2009
From: A small blue planet near Alpha Centauri
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

I'm not surprised you wouldn't "get it", from watching a scene that is so obviously staged porn- made to be sold. Duh.
That kind of thing is a million miles away from what a real owner/slave experience is about. There's no real emotion in it, even acted. The two doms have more of a rapport with each other, than with the sub. Its fake.

To understand the beauty and the sweetness of real torture, you'd hafta view, or take part in, real torture, between people who have actual relationships. Or you'd hafta see some porn that could much more accurately portray that. Porn that could convey the emotional feelings (versus just the tactile aspects) between the dom and submissive.

{{{*AMEN*}}}
That's just exactly why casual play with random people at play parties or demos is Not My Thing. For Me, if there's no connective charge or emotional content, there's no point.

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Post #: 38

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/30/2009 11:30:17 AM

desaatile

Posts: 4
Joined: 8/29/2009
Status: offline

I've always split it in two categories, there is sensual pain, and then there is suffering pain, everyone enjoys sensual pain in some way or another. Sensual pain is as it indicates sensual and can still hurt somewhat but is defined (for me) by being of only slight discomfort, not enough to make you want to move out the way (unless you find the sensation weird), it is easy to drift in to your own mind as it is with most other sensual play. Suffering pain hurts and pulls you into hard reality (and it makes me want to scream and get away) but once it reaches a certain threshold it throws you into another world full of bliss and contentment.

(in reply to cpK69)

Post #: 39

RE: What is exciting about pain - 8/30/2009 12:12:48 PM

mc1234

Posts: 683
Joined: 10/4/2008
Status: offline

When he has me in some degree of pain, every sense is heightened. I feel him, his energy, and mine flows back to him, accepting and exciting. It's erotic and so exciting to submit to him, to be under him and to feel the twinges of pain and to know that he knows exactly how to take us higher - and it is 'us' at that moment. It can be challenging sometimes, which I enjoy also - we keep growing together. It's not really a 'how much can I take' kind of thing - it's more 'how much can I take because I want to see how much higher we can go together' kinda thing. And I love that he pushes me - that trust is huge in making the pain play so exciting also.

It's not a porn video where there's no depth of feeling, but it's us together, experiencing and exploring and giving to one another. It's beautiful.

(in reply to desaatile)

Post #: 40

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