Proof the Matrix is real (Full Version)

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cuckoldmepls -> Proof the Matrix is real (8/28/2009 2:51:46 PM)

Every time i sit down to eat at the dinner table and while I'm looking out the sliding glass doors, the dog always happens to pick that time to take a crap. On top of that he always positions his ass towards me.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (8/29/2009 7:30:18 AM)

The TV commercial I hate the most is on the most, and on almost every channel. Sometimes I can even turn the channel twice and it is running simultaneously.
 
That would never happen if this were reality.




darchChylde -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (8/29/2009 11:24:57 AM)

Whenever you're hungry, a fast-food commercial comes on.

If you've just broken up, the radio becomes flush with melancholy love songs.

When you get a few extra dollars in your pocket, you get a new expense; likewise, the more money you make the less you have after expenses are paid.




SoulPiercer -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (8/29/2009 11:31:20 AM)

When you're at work .. everything moves in super slow motion, but your days off only have 4 hours each.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (8/30/2009 1:02:25 PM)

Flies will buzz you for an hour, but as soon as you go get a flyswatter they are no where to be seen. Like they actually know what a flyswatter is.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (8/31/2009 8:34:15 AM)

I get 4 different phone books dropped on my front porch twice a year for free. Now I ask you. Why would other printers think they can make a better phone book than the original one? There's no way to improve on listing phone numbers and placing ads in the yellow pages. An even better question is why can't businesses figure out that it's only a scam to get them to pay to advertise in multiple books.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (9/1/2009 12:35:29 PM)

I always try and wait for a cool and overcast day to mow the yard for obvious reasons. I'm not a morning person and the yard is usually wet in the morning anyway, so by the time I wait for it to dry and I eat lunch, the sun always comes out about 5 minutes after I start mowing. Coincidence? I think not.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (9/9/2009 8:12:17 PM)

When I was growing up most kids didn't lie. Now, thanks to all the comedy shows that make it look funny, 75% of kids will lie even when they don't have to. Here's proof the matrix isn't real though. Cops will actually believe anything a kid says even if they wrote it down on the back of the hand for their interrogation. Like they have never caught their kids lying. Get real!!!




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (9/20/2009 9:10:40 AM)

The cat never wants to go outside until I sit my ass down on the sofa. I can be working in the kitchen for 15 minutes while he watches me, and he never once goes to the door and meows.

By the way, my last post should have said "is" real, not "isn't" real.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (9/21/2009 12:56:47 AM)

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit
a very persistent one."-- Albert Einstein




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (9/21/2009 12:03:57 PM)

The government has you $10 trillion in debt, is monitoring everyone without probable cause, drug testing you without probable cause, selling American soil and companies to foreign countries and foreign corporations, ignores the 1st (free speech), 2nd (right to keep and bear arms), and 10th amendment (states rights) to the Constitution, now has the right to take your home for a shopping center, and confiscate your home if social security doesn't provide enough money to pay constantly rising property taxes.

The United Nations has been responsible for causing at least 5 wars, Korea and Vietnam when they arbitrarily divided them up, 2 Arab Israeli wars when they created the state of Israel, and the 2nd gulf war when they refused to allow us to finish the job the first time.

And people still voted for more big government, and globalist politicians. Amazing.....

and in reality, not believeable if this were reality.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (9/23/2009 11:56:24 AM)

In the summer time most people keep their thermostat at about 78 degrees, and they feel comfortable. Now if they kept their house at that temperature in the winter time they would be sweating their asses off.

In winter time most people keep their thermostat at about 68 degrees and they feel comfortable. If they kept it that temperature in the summertime, they would be freezing their asses off.

Think about that. Does that make sense?




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (9/25/2009 6:53:44 PM)

The object of football is to score as many points as possible while on offense, and while on defense tackling their runners or protecting against a pass. At no time in history was the goal to intentionally rip the ball out of their hands.

When I was playing football, the coaches never taught us to intentionally rip out the ball. They did however tell us that when the ball was fumbled or in the air it was anyone's ball. Well nowadays players have no sense of fairplay and will attempt to steal the ball even before they tackle them. The unbelieveable part is that no one says anything about it.




pyroaquatic -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (9/25/2009 8:37:18 PM)

LOL.

Luckly the matrix has provided me with the ability to abort a soda-olfactory scene on my keyboard.

(but not my lap, damn you!)




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (10/4/2009 8:21:26 AM)

Windows XP won't let you just turn the computer off like everything else in this world. It has to go through each program and warn you that you may lose unsaved data if you end the program now. So I wait, but every single time it hangs up anyway on each program and tells me it is unable to end this program, and I have to go ahead and end it now. WTF!!!

I suspect that Bill Gates is behind the matrix, because everyone who has windows xp should have caught this one. You people are sleeping while Bill Gates is laughing his ass off.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (10/11/2009 8:07:46 AM)

The Sasquatch Commercial where 3 kids are watching a Sasquatch try and start a fire, then one of them rides by and splashes water on the fire laughing their asses off made me think of this one.

They never have found the body or carcass of any Sasquatch anywhere in the world yet it is obvious that people have seen them. There are just far too many reports from reliable people just as with ufo's.

If Sasquatch buried their dead, then we would find fresh graves from time to time, and dig them up suspecting there had been a murder.

If scavengers ate their remains we would most likely find some huge bones or at least a huge skull now and then.

My personal theory is that the matrix throws in plenty of non believeable bullshit just to make it more interesting for people. I'm waiting for the mole people to come out from the center of the planet.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (10/19/2009 12:16:02 PM)

Everyone is aware that the federal government is too large, abuses their constitutional authority on some issues while ignoring their constitutional responsibility on others, and they have been spending way more than they could possibly take in. $10 trillion now with interest included. Yet, people keep voting for larger and more expansive government. It won't be long before 75% of the country will be on social security, medicare and medicaid or be a government employee or a member of the armed forces.

Who the hell is going to pay these people? Paying enough taxes to fund your own salary doesn't add up.




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (10/24/2009 8:33:23 AM)

If your ex wife decides the kid needs to stay with you for a year due to financial problems or problems at his current school, you can't just enroll the kid with no proof of custody or guardianship, yet Illegal Aliens don't even have to prove they are legal citizens.




Saratov -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (10/24/2009 9:21:04 AM)

Also, if you don't have insurance or a good bank account getting medical care can be tough unless you are here illegally, then it will all be free. [8|]




cuckoldmepls -> RE: Proof the Matrix is real (10/29/2009 1:51:36 PM)

This one is so true. Parents who were rebellious drug using teenagers as they were growing up always raise little hellraisers themselves. Then they can't figure out where they went wrong.




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