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DelightMachine -> RE: Possessive Femdoms (2/26/2006 6:57:12 PM)
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quote:
Subs, do you like it when a femdom is very possessive of you? When she tells you that she wants you to stop pursuing other women or other femdoms (even though she might not be exclusive to you)? Do you like it when she gets jealous or angry if you are flirting with other women?
Or do you prefer a femdom that really enjoys dominating you but doesn't care what you do outside of that time, and isn't the slightest bit interested/jealous about you being around other women or submitting to other women?
Akasha
Whether she's possessive or just wants me as a (regular? collared?) play partner just depends on the relationship. I could go with either, depending on the person, and there are advantages to either. The domina who isn't possessive sounds like more of a friend, where I would be one of a number of submissives. My requirement to be in any kind of LTR would be that I would be valued and cared for. I'd have to look more closely at that in the second kind of relationship you describe. I think all of these types of relationships can work, depending on what all parties want.
If she tells me she wants me to stop pursuing others, then she's both being very commanding, which deeply turns me on, and flattering me by telling me she wants to possess me for her own. Onceburned puts it perfectly -- it's a sign that the two of us need to talk about relationship expectations.
If she gets jealous or angry that I'm flirting with other woman, it says something bad about her. The truth is, I don't flirt with other women when I'm in a relationship (vanilla or D/s). When I would go to a club with a past mistress, I was very very careful not to chat too much with other dominant women. When a very sexy woman was interested in playing with the two of us, I left it entirely in my mistresses hands, not even giving a preference, just saying I would be comfortable with whatever she wanted.
But if I were to flirt with some other woman, she should calmly give me direction on that. It's a flaw in a domme to get mad at a submissive for doing what she hasn't given him a rule about, at least with mild flirting. If the sub is really being out of line with some major flirting, then the domme should simply inform the sub of her objection, her disappointment in him and let him realize the relationship could be on the rocks.
With all that power, what's the reason for getting angry, except lack of self-discipline and self-confidence in the domme?
Or are you talking about the domme getting angry if I'm flirting before I'm in a relationship with that domme? That would almost kill my attraction to that domme. She sounds like the kind of domina I wouldn't be interested in. Yes, it would be flattering, but mostly off-putting.
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