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littlesarbonn -> RE: Need advice.. (9/3/2009 12:19:06 PM)
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My advice to you is to start looking into your local kink community. Most likely, there's one, even if you live in a pretty secluded area of the country (assuming you're in the states or Canada; if not, then your mileage may vary). Munches are great places to connect with people who are into the scene. Join organizations that are into kink, like The Society of Janus, the Service of Mankind Church, and at least ten I can name in the Bay Area/San Jose areas alone. Some of those groups are pretty large, encompassing the entire country with memberships.
As someone said earlier, you have to make sure that you're not going into this with just the fantasy you want fulfilled. If you're interested in being someone's house submissive/slave, then you are not going to do any good for your cause if you approach it with what specific fantasy you want fulfilled only. Women who are into this sort of thing are going to spot that a mile away.
I was lucky in that I was able to be a house slave to a wonderful woman the second time I went back to school (the first time was at West Point, and while there was discipline and service there, it was not the same). I was actually one of her clients as she was a professional dominant, and then I realized I could no longer afford sessions, told her, meaning to thank you for the years we had together and then move on, but she offered me the chance to become her house slave instead of leaving. It eventually turned into a live-in slave situation, which was wonderful. But keep this in mind. I never went to her in the first place with the thought of becoming either her house slave OR her personal slave. It just happened. And quite often that's how it does happen. Most often, it doesn't. Cause even if you connect really well, odds are it's never going to transition to anything different.
Another thing that worked for me over the years is that I communicate a lot with other kinksters, so that when it was time for me to look for a position where I could be of service, finding someone wasn't that hard. As a matter of fact, because I was so "out" there in the community, vanilla women used to find me, get interested in the idea of a man who serves them, and learned to become dominants because they were attracted to me in the first place. So, the world of kink lifestyles is really pretty much an open world for someone to explore.
Keep in mind, you will have a hard time making it happen online. I'm sorry to say this, and MANY will disagree with me, but honestly, you're better off trying to find your local community and meeting people in person. That doesn't mean to not try on collarme or other online sources, but don't rely on those alone. Or you'll become miserable.
Other pieces of advice. Be honest. Be clear with what you are seeking. If you're really seeking some situation where you get to wear a maid's costume and then pretend to clean, be honest about that because you're going to really piss off some dominant (not in a good way) who will throw you out and never speak to you again if you promise to actually be interested in cleaning her house, but are really interested in getting some jollies fulfilled instead. Keep in mind, there's nothing wrong with suppressing your personal desires if you're trying to become a good servant. When I first started out, that first house slave position wasn't really what I was seeking because I had been serving her in real sessions before that happened, and for a couple of months, I was half miserable, and half overjoyed. Then I started to grow into the experience, realizing that the pursuit of the elusive "session" wasn't really what I wanted in the first place. It just took some time, and the right woman, to help me realize that.
Good luck.
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