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MasterG2kTR -> Last Will (9/9/2009 7:06:34 PM)
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I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish
to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances
should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead partisan politicians who
couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it or,
lawyers, doctors, and hospitals interested in simply running up the bills.
If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least
one of the following:
______a Martini ______a Margarita ____ __ a Scotch and soda ______a Bloody Mary ______a Gin and Tonic _______a Glass of Chardonnay ______a Steak ______Lobster or crab legs ______The remote control ______a bowl of ice cream ______The sports page ______Chocolate or ______Sex, then it should be presumed that I won't ever get any better.
When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.
At this point, it is time to call the New Orleans Jazz Funeral Band to come do their thing at
my funeral, and ask all of my friends to raise their glasses to toast the good times we have had.
Signature: ___________________________ Date: ___________________________
NOTE: I also hear that in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub.
The patients are happier and they have a lot more visitors. Some of them don't
even need embalming when their time comes. If anyone knows the name of
this happy place...PLEASE pass it on!
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