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whiteslavebitch -> RE: New Submissive Question (9/23/2009 5:43:07 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: DesFIP
wsb, just a year? Wow, I am impressed. We were ldr for a couple of years and I didn't really start making headway on letting down those barriers until after living together for two. The easy stuff, what he likes and doesn't like in his surroundings came a lot faster than not protecting myself from him.
And yeah, I was sarcastic and bitchy. He would just remind me I didn't have to be, that I was safe. And usually he did this by first dragging me into his arms, his lap.
Remember folks, it is when we act most unlovable that we are most in need of love. If we don't get it when we need it, we don't change. It's like only being allowed water when you've just had some and not when you're thirsty. So if his response to you being metaphorically thirsty is to deny you a drink until you already aren't thirsty, you aren't going to change.
Part of the responsibility of a good dominant is to see this and to lead with it. Something I've learned from him doing it, fulfilling needs I had given up ever expecting to be filled, and more. Which is why I'm so devoted to him
It was probably closer to 2 years (I did say well over a year [:)]) That doesn't mean that I didn't/don't still have issues to work through. It just means that I don't have all those protective barriers in the way any longer. I know he will never intentionally hurt the little child inside of me I protected for 42 years.
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