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humble? - 9/22/2009 6:19:13 PM

peches

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Joined: 9/22/2009
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Hello I am peches. I'm fairly new to D/s and I need to ask questions. I appreciate your website and hope to learn and make friends.

What is humble?

please allow me to expalin my quandry: I've been through alot in the last year and maybe I changed in ways I can't grasp.

Lets see - while things hurt my ego I can get through the ache and press on.

I used to be defensive and argue, not so now. I have no expectations. I can feel lower than anything, my ego destructed Is THAT what humble means?

I don't consider myself really attractive . BUT, For some unknown reason, lately I receive lots more male attention.
I am healthy, nice eyes, good skin, long hair, hour glass figure but i think i could lose a few pounds. Makes me busty - maybe thats it?

Could it be something inside - the ego now lessened? is that what humble means? Is that appealing? Maybe I smile more at strangers?

Has any one else found this happeneing along their journey?

respectfully, peches

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RE: humble? - 9/22/2009 7:04:06 PM

DesFIP

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From: Apple County NY
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Can't speak about humility.

But if you're less defensive now than in the past, it means you will be making more eye contact with people, you will be less tense physically, less frowning, more smiling and people who look open, happy and interested in interacting are the ones who get more attention. Because we all like to be with people who look happy instead of sad,angry,frustrated etc.

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RE: humble? - 9/22/2009 10:08:19 PM

bluefireeyez

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a destructed ego is not humble, it is destructed. Being humble is being able to evaluate yourself and actions and admitting when you are wrong or not walking around thinking you deserve everything handed to you. Appreciate everything you have.

If you are making more eye contact etc. It is most likely making people think you are more open to talking.

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RE: humble? - 9/23/2009 2:33:21 AM

XaviersXian

Posts: 525
Joined: 9/8/2007
From: Australia
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greetings to all,

Humility, to me, is the ability to interract with the world in such a way that you don't draw attention to yourself. A woman I know from the CM forums once asked me how to be humble ... I told her that to be humble, a person has to work to know themselves, their reactions and be completely self centred and arrogant first.

My reasoning behind this advice was that to be humble, one must have nothing to prove to anyone else (and therefore not force themselves onto the world) they mustn't be influenced by other people's opinions, and must be comfortable enough within themselves to bare every last secret of their soul. Only then, will they start to be truly humble.

This is only my opinion, by the way, others may feel very differently about this.

I hope my post is of some help!

well wishes,

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RE: humble? - 9/23/2009 5:10:40 AM

worthlesstrash

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Joined: 9/28/2008
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I found that once I was comfortable in my own skin and didn't care what others thought so much, I gave off a different vibe. I think we a lot of times attract what we are giving off. When I am down, pissed off..etc, I usually find those types of people. When I am in a good mood, happy, content, I give that off to others and I can usually get that back from them.

I am not sure a humble person can know they are humble..if that makes sense. I would think that would almost be prideful to feel you are humble enough to get different attention..etc...hmm..chicken, egg, chicken, egg.
Then again, maybe I am still half asleep and none of this makes sense

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RE: humble? - 9/23/2009 5:14:08 AM

IrishMist

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Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: XaviersXian

greetings to all,

Humility, to me, is the ability to interract with the world in such a way that you don't draw attention to yourself. A woman I know from the CM forums once asked me how to be humble ... I told her that to be humble, a person has to work to know themselves, their reactions and be completely self centred and arrogant first.

My reasoning behind this advice was that to be humble, one must have nothing to prove to anyone else (and therefore not force themselves onto the world) they mustn't be influenced by other people's opinions, and must be comfortable enough within themselves to bare every last secret of their soul. Only then, will they start to be truly humble.

This is only my opinion, by the way, others may feel very differently about this.

I hope my post is of some help!

well wishes,

I pretty much agree with what Miss Xian said here.

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RE: humble? - 9/23/2009 5:17:27 AM

peches

Posts: 3
Joined: 9/22/2009
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Thank you. I see merit in every posters ideas and i will think about your replies.

DesFIP - yes, being less defensive more open softens me and thats warming. yes, to make eye contact and smile. That's what I wanted to know. Thanks for the answer.

bluefireeyez - appreciate what we have, thanks

XaviersXian
- be self centered first. Ok, though I disagree on another point .. A truth to me "self" "IS" even in service. Selfless is baseless. What would we offer?
Just random thoughts.

IrishMist - Ty as well

worthlesstrash - being comfortable in one's skin.. i like that. Ty too

I have been doubting the merit of self-lessness as a concept. I used to think it was a path to submission. At least for me - that word doesn't work. What would i offer?

< Message edited by peches -- 9/23/2009 5:20:37 AM >

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RE: humble? - 9/23/2009 6:26:28 AM

oceanwyndsLoves

Posts: 44
Joined: 9/15/2009
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Hello peches

Humble for me is considering the 'we' verses the 'me' in life. Being grateful for the sunrise and the sunset for to me it humbles me that i have no control of it. Humble does not mean to lower yourself, or your head to others, nor eye contact, instead it is keeping your head up and greeting everyone with eye contact to show them they are valued. Humble is putting love in all you do, even when the day is a rough one. You opening a door for someone is humbleness. You accepting someone opening a door for you is humbleness. To be and live humbly is to see the Universe as a We not just a speck of me.

blessings
oceanwynds

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RE: humble? - 9/23/2009 10:22:14 AM

SaharahEve

Posts: 231
Joined: 6/25/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: peches

What is humble?

Lets see - while things hurt my ego I can get through the ache and press on.

I used to be defensive and argue, not so now. I have no expectations. I can feel lower than anything, my ego destructed Is THAT what humble means?

Could it be something inside - the ego now lessened? is that what humble means? Is that appealing? Maybe I smile more at strangers?

The absence of humility is the absence of personal growth. Pride makes you an easy target for the humiliation monster. Both could be two reasons (out of a few) why some love humiliation; it's a good way to break down your ego and make you an even better slave.

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