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Lockit -> RE: Judging a dominant by their submissive's behavior? (1/25/2010 9:48:45 AM)
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I believe that each person is accountable for themselves and no one has control over everything another might say. However, I do feel that my submissive, if he wishes to remain my submissive, will want to be pleasing to me and not cause situations I feel I must oversee or be involved with to some degree. He is my submissive and therefore associated with me and I don't want a lot of drama and I surely don't want him starting drama. If there is drama, as there is bound to be somewhere down the line, deal with it and make me proud. I hold myself to the same expectations.
Now if either of us is getting into a situation quite often... there is a problem and it will be addressed! As per an agreement between us, I have final say and if I say a thing is bad, it is bad and we act accordingly. To start trouble is bad. To deal with trouble not started by us, is okay. It all depends on the situation.
I will hold my submissive accountable if he is going around saying things to inflame people or stir them up. He most likely will not last long with me if it is something I didn't see beforehand. I will suggest how he is to conduct himself and if he can't see fit, he is not only breaking our agreement and disagree's with how I would want the situaiton handled, but then getting into our dynamic's on his behavior outside our relationship. If I am a part of the group, online or in person and he comes storming in with attitude and pushing buttons... I sure as hell am going to have something to say about it and if it happens more than once... he just might be looking for another dominant.
I see witty submissive's speaking their minds all the time... lol... and love it! I love humor. Sometimes something might cross a line here or there or be misunderstood and these things can be worked out and should be or I would have a problem with my submissive's handling of the situation. Typically if I am seeing poor behavior with other people, it is going to come out in our relationship as well and I simply will not have a button pusher near me for long.
If he takes pride in being my submissive, as I would in having him as my submissive, he darn well better respect that relationship and see that it goes as smoothly as it can. If he is a smart ass in a funny situation.. I love it... but a smart ass to a cop who has pulled us over or in a group of my friends... we have another type of situation!
Our actions and words do reflect who we are and I think striking a balance there is important and for someone like me who doesn't like a lot of drama... he better make sure he isn't causing a lot of drama. Anywhere. Don't make me look the fool for chosing you! lol Don't make it so people don't want to invite me because you come with me! lol
There is a time and place for snark or humor and sarcasm in my world... but not to the point of constant drama and trouble making. Offending people is drama and while I don't care about some who cause their own drama and think it is okay to go toe to toe in some situations for a time... I don't want toe to toe situations everyday.
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