Proper English (Full Version)

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MasterG2kTR -> Proper English (1/28/2010 6:34:04 PM)

Just keeping you in the loop for proper word choice, always looking out for precision communication . . .

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America ,


Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as 'HILLBILLIES.'

You must now refer to them as
APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS .

And furthermore

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a
' BREASTED AMERICAN. '  

2. She is not 'EASY' - She is
'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'  

3. She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a
'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY..'  

4. She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a 
'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.'  

5. She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes
' VERBALLY REPETITIVE..'  

6. She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a
' LOW COST PROVIDER.'

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE  
POLITICALLY CORRECT:  

1.. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a
'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.'  

2.. He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is
'OVERLY CAUCASIAN.'  

3.. He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' - He
'INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.'  

4.. He is not 'BALDING' - He is in
'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.'  

5.. He does not act like a 'TOTAL ASS' - He develops a case of
RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.'
(Loved this one!)  

6.. It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants - It's
'TROUSER CLEAVAGE.'





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