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What then? - 3/18/2004 5:05:22 PM

feline

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So often in these posts, i see suggestions that a person find an alt. lifestyle group, for various reasons. What happens if the person doesn't have a group in their area? Where i lived, the closest "group" was 4 hours away. So . . . . what does one do then?

Thank you for your time.

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RE: What then? - 3/18/2004 5:25:39 PM

iwillserveu

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Post a profile.

I hear some people actually do that.

With luck....

Seriously, if there is no group nearby then the people who say one should get together with a group are already out of the loop. Even heartfelt advice must be taken with an eye on how the advisee's situation differs from the advisor's situation.

< Message edited by iwillserveu -- 3/19/2004 3:27:40 PM >

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RE: What then? - 3/18/2004 6:59:08 PM

feline

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i do believe i said "for various reasons". Posting a profile will not help those new to the lifestyle, looking for answers to questions.

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RE: What then? - 3/18/2004 7:06:34 PM

MistressKiss

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I have met a lot of like-minded people in the yahoo BDSM chat rooms. Granted, I live in Dallas, so there is a plethora of opportunity here. However, often people stop in the chat rooms from the smaller surrounding areas and it's possible that over a period of time you will either meet someone close to you or meet someone who knows someone close to you. I met someone not long ago who lives in the city where I attended high school, and it's a very small town in East Texas.

Keep the faith and good luck to you.

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RE: What then? - 3/18/2004 7:27:00 PM

sub4hire

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressKiss

I have met a lot of like-minded people in the yahoo BDSM chat rooms. Granted, I live in Dallas, so there is a plethora of opportunity here. However, often people stop in the chat rooms from the smaller surrounding areas and it's possible that over a period of time you will either meet someone close to you or meet someone who knows someone close to you. I met someone not long ago who lives in the city where I attended high school, and it's a very small town in East Texas.

Keep the faith and good luck to you.

Maybe those people should start a group. One person leads to two to three..so on and so forth. If nobody ever tries, its their loss.
I'm quite sure I could move most anywhere in the US and find a group to be in.
Even if I had to drive an hour or two. People drive 4 hours to come to my munch once in a while. When you find something you like you don't mind spending the time to get wherever it is.

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RE: What then? - 3/18/2004 10:58:26 PM

inyouagain

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quote:

ORIGINAL: feline
So often in these posts, i see suggestions that a person find an alt. lifestyle group, for various reasons. What happens if the person doesn't have a group in their area? Where i lived, the closest "group" was 4 hours away. So . . . . what does one do then?

Your statement is in past tense (where I lived).
Do you still live 4 hours away from the closest group?
If you are now less than 4 hours from the closest group, then you migrated towards a closer group... regardless of means (rhyme or reason), migration aided your quest.

If this be the case, you yourself would now be a bonafide source of information for those new to the lifestyle where you lived. As sub4hire said, "One person leads to two to three..so on and so forth. If nobody ever tries, its their loss" Networking has advantages after all, here we are talking about it and have never seen one another in real life.

Building a network or group takes time, so naturally the easiest way to gain exposure is via relocation, much in the way many college students network themselves to meet local lifestylers near their campus.

quote:

Posting a profile will not help those new to the lifestyle, looking for answers to questions.

I have to disagree with your comment that posting a profile will not help to get answers to questions. Posting a profile when you live in BumPhuk, Egypt may not get you laid... but it can surely get answers to questions. Of course the nature of the profile will be the nature of the response usually, so if you advocate that you would like mentoring, or simply have discussions concerning your questions... it would improve the quality of responses, hopefully.

How does one learn or prepare for anything? Doing research, more research, more research, more research... and more research... actively pursuing, and more research.

If you sit back and wait for your true desires, you may find they pass you by.

The online community has been the biggest leap in information exchange capability mankind has ever known... while also becoming a playground for juveniles, misfits, predators, scammers, etc lurking among the 'good perverse folks' online.

If you can't see the TV from where you are sitting, should you move to a better vantage point, or should you get a bigger TV? There is no easy point blank answer to "what then". Individual motivation is usually the key to individual success, but life makes no promises to anyone.

Inyouagain

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RE: What then? - 3/19/2004 6:08:37 AM

ShadowHwk

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quote:

ORIGINAL: feline

So often in these posts, i see suggestions that a person find an alt. lifestyle group, for various reasons. What happens if the person doesn't have a group in their area? Where i lived, the closest "group" was 4 hours away. So . . . . what does one do then?

Thank you for your time.

feline,

A couple of ideas come to mind:

If there isn't a group in your area you might consider starting one. Yes, you have to find others in your area to make this possible. So post a profile. Search this and other web sites for like minded folks in your area. When you find folks from your local area, drop them a line, and tell them you are thinking about starting a group.

Even if the nearest local group is a few hours away, it might not hurt to make contact with them anyway. The more people you know in the community the better off you are.

Peace and Light
Terry

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RE: What then? - 3/19/2004 10:18:13 AM

feline

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Ok, first of all let me say that my post was in general. And i would like to thank all those who have sincerely replied.

Yes, it was past tense. i lived in Fresno Calif. at the time. i now live near New Orleans LA. and belong to NOBLE the local group.

But again, my post was mainly for those who might find it bewildering when suggested to find a group and learn they have none.

Thank you all once again!

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RE: What then? - 3/19/2004 10:29:39 AM

sub4hire

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quote:

ORIGINAL: feline

Ok, first of all let me say that my post was in general. And i would like to thank all those who have sincerely replied.

Yes, it was past tense. i lived in Fresno Calif. at the time. i now live near New Orleans LA. and belong to NOBLE the local group.

But again, my post was mainly for those who might find it bewildering when suggested to find a group and learn they have none.

Thank you all once again!

Not to beat a dead horse here but, I live in So Cal. I know of several groups in Fresno and the surrounding areas.

I think groups can be found if you just know where to look. When they cannot you form one yourself.
Become a BDSM god...

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RE: What then? - 3/19/2004 10:41:10 AM

MistressKiss

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quote:

ORIGINAL: feline

Yes, it was past tense. i lived in Fresno Calif. at the time. i now live near New Orleans LA. and belong to NOBLE the local group.

How lucky for you! I visited New Orleans not too long ago and I met a good friend who is a male Dominant in New Orleans. What a great town! I envy you living there. If I were single and had no kids, I'd move there myself.

If you would like to know more about the scene there, I will be happy to give you my contact's information. He's on Yahoo! Messenger and would not mind talking with you at all. You may even know him. Email me or IM me if you would like to know.

Have fun!

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RE: What then? - 3/19/2004 2:53:14 PM

feline

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sub4hire

Not to beat a dead horse here but, I live in So Cal. I know of several groups in Fresno and the surrounding areas.

I think groups can be found if you just know where to look. When they cannot you form one yourself.
Become a BDSM god...

Really?! i must have been gone longer then i thought. i would love to know more about these groups as i may be going back by the end of this year.

i don't really see myself as a BDSM god, goddess perhaps. LOL

And again thank you!

feline

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