leadership527
Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
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quote:
ORIGINAL: lally2
id agree and argue that most Ds or Ms people are motivated sexually by their Dominant or submissive personalities.
OK, so I know I'm an oddball on this one, but in this case that weirdness makes the problem much simpler. Since I would be looking for social submissive, not a sexual submissive, I wouldn't have to DO anything nor would they. We would simply meet. It would become immediately clear who was running the show. I generally find that the best place to look for the signals I care about are in the totally normal sorts of statements... "Have a seat over there", "The salad here is good, you should try it." type stuff that is so mundane that it flies below the radar of D/s. At the end of the lunch or whatever, there is no way I could miss the fact that for the personality type I am looking for, it was me who directed everything without having to exert any overt influence. The personality type I look for submits in a reflexive way.
Just for the record, WAY more important to me than someone's dom/sub nature is the entire rest of their nature. If I was looking for a 3rd for Carol and I it'd be a sub. But if Carol died and I needed a new partner, it could be anyone.
_____________________________
~Jeff
I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael
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RE: are they mixed messages - 
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