mentally unbreakable sub/slave (Full Version)

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unbridledchattel -> mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 1:27:54 AM)

would like a Master's thoughts/opinion on this subject please ... bear in
mind the sub/slave shows obedience and willingness and ability to be a great sub/slave .... would you toss them to the curb ?? work with them another way ?? use them differently ??




reynardfox -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 1:35:10 AM)

What a cute little question. Like a dodo bird, a chocolate tea pot, an african tiger, a return trip on the Titanic or a rap track by Judy Garland, such an entity does not exist. But please, feel free to dream.




Lashra -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 3:17:02 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: unbridledchattel

would like a Master's thoughts/opinion on this subject please ... bear in
mind the sub/slave shows obedience and willingness and ability to be a great sub/slave .... would you toss them to the curb ?? work with them another way ?? use them differently ??


What do you mean by "mentally unbreakable"? If the sub/slave is obedient to the Owners will, willing to learn more and perhaps push limits and has the ability to do perform their role as negotiated, what is there to break?

I don't believe in "breaking" my subs/slave, I believe in inspiring them to follow Me. To date I've never had a problem. Perhaps some inspiration is lacking in your relationship?

~Lashra




unbridledchattel -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 3:18:21 AM)

please, what basis do you have for saying "such an entity does not exist" ??







unbridledchattel -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 3:24:25 AM)

and there is the answer that was for this one to hear ....

" I believe in inspiring them to follow Me " ... that is the issue, this slave was not inspired by Him though she was willing and has an open mind ... it was said that this one's mind could not be broken to His standards and now it is believed the "chemistry" was not there to begin with ....

thank You Lashra for providing insight on this nagging issue ....




DarkSteven -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 4:02:44 AM)

I'm in agreement with Lashra.

I like the word "chemistry".  It's not your fault, it's not his fault.  Sometimes the matchup just doesn't work.

I'm a little concerned that you continue to refer to him breaking your mind. That term sounds like he might be an abuser masquerading as a Dom.




myotherself -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 4:14:05 AM)

yup, I'm with Steven and Lashra here.

I'm a mentally strong sub, although I have the need/desire to serve. However I want to do so with my mind fully intact [:)]

I've met a few 'Doms' who think a 'twue' sub has to be broken and rebuilt, and if that's the kink of both/all parties involved then I say 'fill yer boots'! [:D]

But to be completely honest, if I present to a Dom that I'm a willing sub/slave and show that I will be a great sub/slave, why would they need to break me? It's like searching for years for a perfect piece of china for a collection, then saying 'it's perfect, but it'll be MORE perfect if I chip the edges'.

I suspect, as Steven says, that this Dom isn't really a Dom, or is very inexperienced and expects to conduct a D/s relationship based on the porn he has read/viewed. Not the best basis for a relationship!




crazyml -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 4:25:28 AM)

Personally - I'm not all that interested in "breaking" a sub, much more focussed on building, creating, developing, supporting.

That said; I guess you have a choice/compromise to make - so the question shouldn't be whether I or anyone else here would toss the sub to the curb, but whether you in dialogue with the sub feel you can establish a relationship that meets both your needs. If yes - then stick with it, if no then I'd suggest parting amicably (as opposed to curb tossing).




DesFIP -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 5:14:28 AM)

It sounds like you're well out of it. So why refer to yourself as having been kicked to the curb? Wouldn't it be better to reframe it as both of you moving on since the needed connection wasn't there?

On paper I may be compatible with lots of men. In actuality there are damn few who I have the necessary chemistry with and of them, many were not suitable for me as partners. You need it all to have a relationship work. Friendship, sincere respect (on both sides), true liking of each other, compatibility in many ways and chemistry.




MonPetitChaton -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 6:33:33 AM)

When I Domme...there is a persona...a way of observing, paying attention to details...asking the right questions that will give you keys to a subs inner workings..
Finding their triggers is a simple matter of being observant and a healthy understanding of human nature.

Everyone has their weakness and a chink in their mental armor.
So to answer your question...

No, there is no such thing as an unbreakable sub......with the only caveat that it takes the right sort of knowing dominant, be it Dom or Domme to break and or find the sub in any given subject.




GraciousLady -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 6:34:00 AM)

Why would anyone want to break another mentaly? That's very violent, abusive and unhealthy. Perhaps if the above alluded to relationshp had been based more in reality you would not have to ask such a question?




Focus50 -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 6:43:58 AM)

I don't believe in "breaking" my sub/slave - not physically; not mentally; not emotionally! Doing so is how kidnappers "dominate" their captive victims....

As others have suggested, you seem to be describing a mutual incompatability. Compatability is the key; it's not enough to agree to be someone's slave and comply with blind obedience. That's just using someone up until they inevitably die within. A slave needs an environment to grow, NOT be broken!

And I don't mind admitting that, in order to allow a particular slave to grow/thrive etc, it may require myself to make personal adjustments and adaptations so we can *both* live a happy and harmonious M/s relationship. Far better to compromise a little than crush the very spirit and soul that attracted me to her in the first place. Nobody's perfect, starting with *me*!

With 6 billion people on the planet and 3 billion females, there's prabably barely a hundred I could be compatible with. The chances of meeting more than one or two of them in my lifetime are astronomical. Think about that the next time you open your daily mail from some stranger calling themselves "Master" and starts taking liberties and giving commands....

And welcome to the Forums... :-)

Focus.




MonPetitChaton -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 7:00:56 AM)

Meh.....I don't believe the OP mentioned relationships.

D/s dynamic can happen over time or it can happen within 3 seconds in a club scene.
It has nothing to do with relationship and everything to do with chemistry and the mindset of the parties in that moment.
Chemistry will have you drawn to the other long enough to sit on the same couch...perception and observation and thoughtful question will offer you the keys to their kink....
That is breaking.
Finding within that person the keys to their pleasure to the point where their self control breaks down and they embrace and become abandoned in their participation.

This...(maybe) is the breaking the OP was referring to?




kiwisub12 -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 7:32:28 AM)

I am not a horse. I don't "need" breaking.

And if a dom mentioned breaking me, i would politely enquire what he meant by breaking, and the answer would pretty much dictate my following reaction.




wenchwanted42 -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 9:06:54 AM)

I don't really understand the whole concept of breaking, molding, rebuilding, turning someone into something you want, etc. He says what he wants, he generally gets it. If I have a problem with it, I say so. Pretty simple. We can find better and more fun uses for his crop and rope than wild sub rodeoing [:D]




kiwisub12 -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 9:35:52 AM)

*grins* i quite agree!




DesFIP -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 10:29:50 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MonPetitChaton

Meh.....I don't believe the OP mentioned relationships.



She implied it when she mentioned being "kicked to the curb". Playing with someone at a dungeon leads to you parting after the play is over. You don't get kicked out.




afkarr -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 10:39:29 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub12

*grins* i quite agree!



[sm=cute.gif] why thank you

( I hate it when I forget who I'm here as and pop in under the joint account.....lol)




Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 11:14:03 AM)

At times, the questions ones asks reveal a lot about the frame of mind a person has at the moment. This question is a bit of an exploration into forming a pre-decision for a circumstance. Questions themselves will be a reflection of limited knowledge or understanding in a given matter. Without judgement to the Character of the OP, it's apparent there is a lack of understanding and knowledge, which in essense lends itself to a narrow degree of bias in the thought. The question itself illuminates the nature of limited personal reflection and rationalization.

Technically, every human being is subject to being mentally broken (Dominants included). There's this degree of assumed all-powerful ignorance that spews up in the minds of some human beings. An feable attempt at compartmentlization of human characteristics according to submissive or Dominant like traits/characteristics. Yes, the questioned asked reflects a lot here.

None the less, the responses people have posted reflect a lot as well. Being mentally broken does not automatically mean a negative, nor should denote destruction in an unhealthy manner. The concept inheriently is a neutral one. There is being Broken in a good way and there is being broken in a bad way. It can go either way, depending upon the circumstances.

To the OP people are mentally breakable, just toss them into the right circumstances and situations. Tends to vary from person to person. If you think you are unbreakable, you're wrong.

In terms of breaking somebody, I'm assuming you mean "conditioning" in some manner or way. Some people are very open mind and are very happy to know what things they can change or do to please or otherwise how to behave in accordence to some rules or guidelines. Just letting them know verbally is all that is required. Others need to have it reinforced or drilled into thier minds. Pffftt.. repetition. Rinse Lather and repeat enough times until it becomes habit.

Again being broken is not always bad, many people have bad habits they wish, want or desire to break. Many people have desire to change something about their lives.

Kicking somebody to a curb is a personal decision and it's not as black and white. Depends upon many many things, what the other person means to another, what the value is of the person.. including the relationship itself. Making a decision to work with somebody or maintain a relationship is another choice. Again, not simplistic nor black and white. While it comes down to Yes/No (simple answer) the combination of things being factored into the choice is generally many things.




CalifChick -> RE: mentally unbreakable sub/slave (4/17/2010 2:36:25 PM)

Breaking a bad habit and being mentally broken are not the same thing.  I have never, ever heard the phrase "mentally broken" in a neutral or positive manner.  If it is being used in a positive manner, then it most likely is the wrong phrase for the situation.

Cali




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