Andalusite
Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009 Status: offline
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LA, there's nothing whatsoever wrong with a submissive/etc. requesting something, and their enjoying it doesn't make them unsubmissive. However, if there is no room in the script for the Dominant to be creative, then I don't see it as submission at all. In your scenario, if the Dominant wants maple cabinet faces, sunny yellow walls, and light blue curtains, and the submissive insists on pink walls, white curtains with pink flowers, and white cabinet facings, since that was her dream kitchen since she was a kid, she isn't being submissive by insisting on it! Hopefully, the two of them could find a compromise that they're both happy with. Heck, the Dominant might even decide to indulge her and let her have her way. *shrugs* My Master encourages me to ask for things I want, and I encourage my submissive playpartner to tell me what she likes. Heck, even if she did give me a fairly detailed scenario, I might decide to indulge her - nothing wrong with that. I just wouldn't think of my following her script as her submitting to me, for that one particular scene. thatsub, I've talked about this on the forums before, and I mentioned the only way I'd be into bisexual play would be in the context of a poly relationship, with lots of snuggles and going on dates all three of us together, and got a lot of "Eww, cuddling with a guy is a hard limit! I want his dick in my mouth/up my ass, but I don't want to talk to him!" kind of responses. I'm not looking anymore, so it's a moot point, but I got a fairly negative impression of people who wanted forced play so far. None of them seemed the slightest bit open to my having any input. One guy who messaged me on the other side even expected me to orgasm with no stimulation but watching him parade around in panties. So, I tend to think of them as a bunch of people who are focused on their fantasy, not my reality. I like humiliation play in some contexts, but what they were demanding just didn't push my buttons in a positive way. Nothing wrong with what they want, if they can get it, but they sure as heck weren't going to get it from me, even though I had some interest in male-male stuff and in helping guys cross-dress. Their mindset was completely incompatible with mine about the same activities. I enjoy physical "force" play with both my Master and my submissive playpartner - wrestling around and playfighting are fun! I can do humiliation play with her in a way that actually flows for me, and that I find amusing or intriguing, instead of stilted and boring.
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