Question to Ponder #2

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Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 12:26:17 PM

Dustyn

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I am sure that all that read this have at least heard of, and have a mild understanding, of the concepts of sub- and dom-space.

Here's the scenario I am mulling over.

A switch, as an act of submission to his/her dominant, is acting as a third party's dominant during a scene.

Is it possible for the switch to enter both sub- and dom-space at the same time?

If yes, why and if no, why not?

My first reaction would be to say no, it's not possible, but since both are essentially endorphin rushes in the brain and body, it could, in theory, be possible.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 12:27:56 PM

Dustyn

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On a side note, I will be posing questions as they pop into my head, assuming of course I have access to a computer at the time. I work construction, so hauling a laptop around would probably not be the wisest idea, as you can imagine.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 12:49:27 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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Let's just say I've had nights where I would be kneeling and worshipping my partners feet, and then stand up and lovingly untie some bondage I've done on another partner. I've had my hair stroked as I stroked the hair of another.

If you can imagine it, it happens. I had very different energy going on with the people at the same time. I just interacted with the other person appropriately for how our energy was going.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 2:14:19 PM

Dustyn

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Hmmm, interesting way of putting it, and a nice explanation. I just have difficulties envisioning it being nearly pure dominant in my approach to BD/SM. That is why I am coming to this section of the board, instead of somewhere else. It would be idiocy to ask a cat what it's like to be a fish. Why ask a dominant what it's like to be a switch?

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 2:37:30 PM

BitaTruble

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For me the two things are felt differently, are arrived at by different routes and take me in two very different directions. I'm not capable of feeling both at once. If I am using topping skills during a scene at the command of Himself, my head is completely wrapped around submission. I would not experience topspace or subspace during such a scene. I can't get into subspace without pain and I can't experience topspace without being fed energy by a bottom. When I'm topping and that energy is flowing directly to Himself at the same time, there is nothing to draw on to go somewhere else such as topspace. I can't switch in midstream either. When I feel the urge to express the other side, it always manifests via my sadism. I want to 'hurt' someone, feed off their energy and it's a charge for me, generally one which lives me giddy as opposed to relaxed the way subspace leaves me. I am a sado-masochist enjoying both sides of the pain equation, hence the term switch, but my D/s M/s orientation is strictly and always slave.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 3:13:18 PM

Evanesce

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quote:

A switch, as an act of submission to his/her dominant, is acting as a third party's dominant during a scene.

Is it possible for the switch to enter both sub- and dom-space at the same time?

For myself? No. First of all, I have never dominated someone else at Master's behest. I top because I want and need to do so, and His role in that lies purely in determining whether or not He feels I deserve the privilege of doing so.

That said... because subspace only happens through pain, and topspace only happens through focus and feedback, the two are never going to occur at the same time. Not for me.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 3:34:39 PM

Sensualips

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Hmm, I don't typically enter subspace or domspace as people describe. I do get an attitude or head space. Often they are distinct but sometimes they overlap or are blended together.

For example, I have done a double-topping scene where I am feeling very "domly" towards the bottom, but obedient and pleasing and submissive to my co-top.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 5:15:09 PM

Dustyn

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Some interesting insights. I certianly appreciate the responses and hope to see more.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 8:12:56 PM

Laura

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I've never felt sub and Dom at the same time. But there have been some quick changes in response to the person I am with. Sometimes it feels like a power surge and other times it feels like I'm being interrupted in the middle of reading a really good book, at the good part. I like going from sub to Dom better, it has a positive energy. To go from Dom to sub makes me feel I have to back down. I roleplay as a bratty sub until I can connect to feeling sub, that quieter energy. Sometimes there is a middle ground but I never feel I am both at the same time. Most of the time I am just me, not either sub or Dom.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 4/5/2006 11:34:49 PM

Dustyn

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Now that is definately an interesting way of putting it, Laura, and one that I can actually grasp with both hands. Will definately have to mull this over for a couple of hours before I really respond to it.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 3/5/2007 8:43:15 PM

Mustardseed

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dustyn

A switch, as an act of submission to his/her dominant, is acting as a third party's dominant during a scene.

Is it possible for the switch to enter both sub- and dom-space at the same time?

If yes, why and if no, why not?

My first reaction would be to say no, it's not possible, but since both are essentially endorphin rushes in the brain and body, it could, in theory, be possible.

My vote is yes. Positions such as Lieutenant, Evil Hench-Person, Right-Hand Man (or whatever) suggest that the switch is in control of certan portions of a scene, while still directly answerable to their own dominant.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 3/6/2007 4:34:58 PM

beltainefaerie

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I would second LA's description. I have had many evenings like that. However, I have also had evenings with my sub and my Master where I was firmly locked into one headspace or the other. I find that if I shift too heavily into my dominant space I process things differently. While I am generally a masochist, I can be too much in a sadist/Domme space. It is disconcerting to have Master slap me and just think "Ow", when that is normally a senstion I enjoy immensely. I prefer the flowing evenings or having separate experiences.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 3/8/2007 6:28:11 PM

SilverShadows

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Yes, because I have done it.

A good example is being a sub who is in charge of other subs. A head housekeeper forexample. You are submissive to the master/mistress and very domanent over the other subs. See to the mistress/masters needs and keep the other servants in line.

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RE: Question to Ponder #2 - 3/10/2007 4:13:44 PM

Elorin

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For me, entering subspace includes shedding of all of my worries and concern, letting my Dom take those worries onto himself so that I can be free.
I would not be able to do that while actively Topping another because I feel that my responsibility to my bottom is to remain aware of them and their body and their signals at all times, which requires me to be very here and now in the moment.

I could, however, feel very warmly submissive and devoted to my Dom while topping another at his behest.

However, I have experienced something interesting when subbing to M. I was leaned over a spanking bench getting a taste of the single tail and very much in subspace when my boy brought me a glass of water. I got a fabulous headrush of power and love as I drank from the glass and pinched my boy's nipple firmly, until he cried out. Then I thanked him and he took the glass away and I went back to floating.

However, I will state that it wasn't Top space for me. It was not the sensation of a highly focused, everything but my sub leaves my attention, intentness that I get in Top space. And I can almost guarantee that had I felt the singletail in those moments when I was focused on my boy, it would have been much more painful than when I was indulging in subspace and floating.

I can have a taste of one, while in the other, but I don't think I can have both headspaces in the sense that I think of them, at the same time.

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