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RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 9:57:23 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dsmk7

You Deserve what you tolerate.

May I ask if when you were 18 you had this knowledge and lived it?

I know for myself it took me a long time to be comfortable enough to stand up for myself and say no.

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RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 10:51:18 AM

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And now you are sitting down, flashing some thigh....seems you are saying yes!

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RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 10:54:34 AM

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From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
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Did anyone watch the orangutan with the hound??

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RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 10:57:16 AM

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Change your phone #. (It works, trust me)

Don't give in to her at every occasion.

If you want to say no then say NO. That little two letter word is easy enough to say. Practice in front of a mirror if you have to.

O, and welcome BTW.

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RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 1:10:35 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartcream

Did anyone watch the orangutan with the hound??

It really was something...Are orangutangs not some of the happiest things you have ever seen...I love it when he rolls around after the dog or falls onto his back.

Very nice video. However, it really has nothing to do with the op...Because his hound dog seems to be kind of a crazy twat.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 5/8/2010 1:11:03 PM >

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RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 1:24:26 PM

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From: Psychoalphadiscobetabioaquadoloop
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quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

quote:

ORIGINAL: heartcream

Did anyone watch the orangutan with the hound??

It really was something...Are orangutangs not some of the happiest things you have ever seen...I love it when he rolls around after the dog or falls onto his back.

Very nice video. However, it really has nothing to do with the op...Because his hound dog seems to be kind of a crazy twat.

I like when the orangutan frenches the doggie. I like the way the orangutan holds the hounds head like a soccer ball, so fickin cuuuuuuuute!

I am part orangutan so I would know how relevant this posting is to this thread and all of CM actually. And actually to most of the world too. Very relevant stuff, I tell ya!

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RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 4:17:32 PM

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Joined: 7/26/2009
From: USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Gurlugon

I can't afford a counselor and that was some pretty damn good advice. I just told her that I don't want her to come over tonight and that she needs to give me the space that I want.

Print out these messeges.. leave them with her, or on her door. Do not answer her calls, or knocks. Tell her it's for one week, seven days.

(in reply to Gurlugon)

RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 6:46:08 PM

Titanium0Master

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Joined: 4/27/2010
From: Pittsburgh, PA
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From your story it sounds like you keep taking her back because you can't bring yourself to hurt her. Unfortunately sometimes (probably most of the time) there is no way to break up with someone without hurting them.

You are just going to have to understand that you breaking up with her is going to hurt her. It sounds like it also hurts you as well and you are just going to have to deal with that hurt yourself if you really want to end it.

The first breakup is always the hardest.

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RE: I need help. - 5/8/2010 9:26:31 PM

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so....tell us..... did no really mean no?

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RE: I need help. - 5/9/2010 7:32:18 PM

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Short answer: say no when you mean no. don't say maybe.

Long answer: obviously you are a social submissive who is incapable of saying anything but maybe when you mean no, because your instinct is to roll over for everyone you meet like an omega wolf, so you need someone to say it for you. You need to find a dominant who will take care of you and deal with social situations that you can't handle for you. Finding someone willing to take charge of your life for you is not easy even when you don't come encumbered with an ex you can't get rid of because you won't stand up for yourself, so you must find something you have to offer that will attract one. Start those tongue push-ups right away.

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RE: I need help. - 5/9/2010 7:43:50 PM

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she's addicted to the weed. she will say anything to get it. she knows how you feel about her and she doesn't care as long as she keeps getting the weed. one night tell her you didn't get any, and ask her if she can find it for you. then tell her you don't have the extra money to buy it and she will have to pay for it. then see if she wants to come over.

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RE: I need help. - 5/10/2010 2:12:04 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: HeathenMa1am

Short answer: say no when you mean no. don't say maybe.

Long answer: obviously you are a social submissive who is incapable of saying anything but maybe when you mean no, because your instinct is to roll over for everyone you meet like an omega wolf, so you need someone to say it for you. You need to find a dominant who will take care of you and deal with social situations that you can't handle for you. Finding someone willing to take charge of your life for you is not easy even when you don't come encumbered with an ex you can't get rid of because you won't stand up for yourself, so you must find something you have to offer that will attract one. Start those tongue push-ups right away.

He is 18 for crying out loud, it isn't unusual to find people that age who do not yet feel confident to be assertive, or do not yet have all of the skills and knowledge to communicate clearly and directly.

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Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. Martin Luther King
Godmother of the subbie mafia
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http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=2002501
http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=790885

(in reply to HeathenMa1am)

RE: I need help. - 5/10/2010 2:28:17 AM

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From: somewhere out there.....
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OP, you are being manipulated, plain and simple......we women are very, very, VERY good at it, we learn the skills young, and will use them for anything and everything...in this case, it sounds like she just wants your weed. And tears are out best weapon!

Not to beat a dead horse, but don't answer the phone, the door, e-mail...ANYTHING from her. Tell her to take a hike, it sounds as if you've tried being nice about breaking up....so suck it up and be mean. THEN FOLLOW THRU! Sooner or later, she'll get the hint.....and go someplace else for her weed. (Which you probably should stop doing too....sorry, it's the mother in me....but it ain't helping!) I haven't looked at your profile, but if you live at home, tell your family that she's out of your life for good.....if they manage to let her in, just go to your room and lock the door, and don't come out.....these days, everyone's got an I-pod w/earbuds....put 'em in and let her talk away.

My main concern is for the apparent violent thoughts you are having.....it's great that you recognize that they are bad, but sooner or later, she's gonna push that button one too many times, and you'll head down a path that is better off not traveled. She's not the One, so move on and find the one that is.....you're way too young to be having this much drama in your life!

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RE: I need help. - 5/10/2010 2:33:22 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: heartcream

Did anyone watch the orangutan with the hound??

*Loved it!

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RE: I need help. - 5/10/2010 4:34:51 AM

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From: Quietville
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Gurlugon

. She thinks that I need someone there with me because of my anger, when it's more like I wish there was no one around so that I wouldn't be so angry.

Oh and I forgot to mention that I dream about beating the living shit out of her almost every night. yeah. It's not good.

You do realize that your anger can drive those dreams to reality, don't you?

You are the only one who can stop this.

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RE: I need help. - 5/10/2010 4:41:22 AM

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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She can't whine at you if you don't talk to her.
"I don't want to see you again. Goodbye".

Then hang up. Then shut the door in her face. Then turn around in the grocery store and walk away leaving the cart.
Do not engage, just repeat the same phrase every single time. "I don't want to see you again. Goodbye".

It has to be exactly the same phrase or it won't sink in. Followed by you taking the appropriate action. If you don't want to be involved, then you hang up. You don't return messages. And so on.

When you talk to her, see her, anyway then your actions say you do want to be with her. So if you don't, then don't talk, don't see her. It really is that simple.

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RE: I need help. - 5/10/2010 4:55:24 AM

lizi

Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: HeathenMa1am

Short answer: say no when you mean no. don't say maybe.

Long answer: obviously you are a social submissive who is incapable of saying anything but maybe when you mean no, because your instinct is to roll over for everyone you meet like an omega wolf, so you need someone to say it for you. You need to find a dominant who will take care of you and deal with social situations that you can't handle for you. Finding someone willing to take charge of your life for you is not easy even when you don't come encumbered with an ex you can't get rid of because you won't stand up for yourself, so you must find something you have to offer that will attract one. Start those tongue push-ups right away.

Seriously? He's 18 and this is his first and only girlfriend. How would he even know if he supposedly needs a Dominant to take care of him yet? He just needs to mature and get some practice in life. It would actually be the worst thing for him at this point to have someone take charge of his life - he needs to do that himself and he will. He took the first step in coming here for help.

(in reply to HeathenMa1am)

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