SweetNika
Posts: 955
Joined: 4/19/2008 From: Forest Hills, Maryland Status: offline
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Is it a preference or fetish? At what point does admiration of certain characteristics (mocha skin, jet-black hair, a petite stature, a porcelain complexion) become a full-blown fetish? And further, can you fetishize your own race? I believe it is difficult to differentiate between a fetish and characteristic. The only rule that sticks seems to be making blanket statements about an entire race of people (i.e. all white women are wild in bed) as an indicator of a fetish.So when I hear a comment like “Asian girls are passive,” it does give me some pause. Hearing a statement like that kind of makes me think that the speaker already has a preconceived notion of what “Asian” is – and it probably excluding many women of Asain ethnicity. On the other hand, sometimes certain characteristics (which may or may not be common to a certain race or ethnicity) can be highly coveted by individuals. Darker skin is not common to all races. Neither is long, straight, jet black hair or blue eyes. So, it would stand to reason that people who find certain characteristics attractive would start seeking out individuals with those characteristics – which may lead to dating along racial lines. The idea of fetishizing one’s own race is another charged idea. Growing up, I was taught that “white is beautiful” and that edict guided most of my ideas about attractiveness and appeal until I became an older teen. Many of my friends still cite same race preferences in dating (though most of us actively dabble other places.) Why is it that a preference for certain characteristics – like locs, a thicker/thinner body type, skin tone – are more acceptable with your own racial group? Is it fetishizing if a dark-skinned black male only dates light-skinned black women? Is it fetishizing if my Korean friends express a preference for Korean men only? Or Korean men and white men only? Myself I find men with dark skin and brown eyes very attractive. I personally love the contrast when our bodies lay next to each other, I find it very erotic. Hmmm…preference or fetish?
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