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RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/1/2010 5:47:03 PM   
sliceofsub


Posts: 3
Joined: 12/19/2009
Status: offline 		i started masturbating to a climax at age 4 to fantasies of slavery. i didn't know what i was doing, of course. It wasn't until I was abou t 11 when i made the link that what i was doing was sexual. I forced the thoughts down until i was 18, not realizing I was hoping inside that each relationship could turn violent and loving all at the same time.

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RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/1/2010 5:49:22 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		At age 4?.... ok, if you say so.

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RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/1/2010 5:50:06 PM   
AtHerHeels1


Posts: 6
Joined: 5/16/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Psamathe

I'm completely in sync with AtHerHeels1...

...and the afternoon Gothic soap opera Dark Shadows fueled my love for wanting to be the victim...

Thanks for the memories, AtHerHeels1!


You too!  Forgot ALL ABOUT "Dark Shadows!"  Watched it every day!

(in reply to Psamathe)
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RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/1/2010 5:52:34 PM   
AtHerHeels1


Posts: 6
Joined: 5/16/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

At age 4?.... ok, if you say so.


FWIW... I say so too.  I just didn't 'know' what I was doing until probably six years later.

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RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/1/2010 5:56:33 PM   
sliceofsub


Posts: 3
Joined: 12/19/2009
Status: offline 		then i ran across someone who saw what i could be and he formed me into a perfect slave. we ended....but i couldn't forget my teachings and my feelings.
and i can remember doing it in my earliest memories at my babysitters house during naptime. i didn't touch, just rubbed against blankets, but it instilled a sexuality in me that has altered my life and way of thought.

(in reply to AtHerHeels1)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/1/2010 6:42:27 PM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		I read "The Pearl," which was Victorian S/M erotica, many years ago. It sparked fantasies, but seemed far too extreme to be realistic, or to even attempt to incorporate it into a relationship. When I was 20, I started dating someone who I'd known for over a year. He very shyly told me that he enjoyed being spanked and tied up with scarves and such, and that he wanted to be useful and make me happy. We didn't use D/s terminology until we'd been together for at least a couple of years. S/M, bondage, service, and other aspects of D/s started out gradually, then ramped up as I grew more confident and sure of myself. We were together for about 5 years.

(in reply to sliceofsub)
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RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/1/2010 6:51:03 PM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		I saw that crackly black and white film of Great Expectations with John Mills as Pip, made in 1946 . . . and got utterly horny at the way Jean Simmons, as the young Estelle, treated him.  I was aged about eight at the time.  I don't think it was my earliest sub/maso rise experience, either.  Very uncomfortable, especially in schoolboy shorts.

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(in reply to sliceofsub)
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RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/1/2010 9:00:11 PM   
DarlingSavage


Posts: 2808
Joined: 9/18/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sliceofsub

i started masturbating to a climax at age 4 to fantasies of slavery. i didn't know what i was doing, of course. It wasn't until I was abou t 11 when i made the link that what i was doing was sexual. I forced the thoughts down until i was 18, not realizing I was hoping inside that each relationship could turn violent and loving all at the same time.


I had no idea anyone else started having sick fantasies at such an early age.  I was about 5.  Used to fantasize all kinds of sick shit that I had no name for, as well.  I can't get explicit, since I was 5 and all, but yeah, there it is, and no, I don't think that that means little kids want sex and it doesn't endorse sexual abuse of children, however, I think the ideas came from someplace outside myself.  I just can't remember where. 


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(in reply to sliceofsub)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/6/2010 4:25:24 PM   
SlaveSubtoserve


Posts: 282
Joined: 6/21/2006
Status: offline 		...wow what a great thread to waltz back down memory lane a bit.....for me i had fantasies of being tied up and displayed for the smartest girl in my 2nd grade class and it progressed from there with rabid bondage fantasies reemerging during puberty......especially after returning home from high school dances and parties and such.....much self-bondage through the teens accompanied by always trying to get my girlfriends to tie me up etc with varying successes....and was so happy to discover that this was not just my own little twisted world once i grew up a bit....with me its always focused on submitting to smart women (have a sizzling brainy girl kink) with bondage and submission and control and worship with the s/m interest developing later.....and it was alway it seems to a girl i kind of knew and felt comfortable with so i was a bit put off and still am by the whole grown-up version of F/m with the queen bitch and pro-domme-ing focus= as it was so not what originally sparked my desires= sigh and sigh again!

...and yes i would always go out of my way to watch the Batman and other of that ilk show like the avengers, etc.

(in reply to DarlingSavage)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/6/2010 4:29:49 PM   
gedienstig


Posts: 155
Joined: 5/9/2010
Status: offline 		I bought a comic book at age 11 I thnk, which had a bdsm scene in it, where the villain wanted to be tied up, and then the heroine tied him up and left him standing there with a snide remark. Come to think of it, that comic book was retarded beyond the stretch of human imagination, but still, the image of the S&M room and the guy being tied up all of a sudden rang a bell down there, even though I hardly knew what S&M was...

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If they say why, why?
Tell 'em that it's human nature

(in reply to SlaveSubtoserve)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/6/2010 4:33:31 PM   
UniqueRaven


Posts: 1237
Joined: 9/30/2009
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline 		My earliest fantasies were always about being kept in a cage by a man - even way before i knew what sex was. i would fantasize about being kept and he would pet me and never let me go, and i was his plaything that he adored and i pleased him - it was quite erotic. Later as i learned about sex my fantasies became colored with that as well.

i began fantasize about being kept as a slave (chained to the bed and that sort of thing) as a pre-teen - and it never went away. But for a long time i thought i was "sick" for my fantasies. i married a "vanilla" man very young - and then discovered the internet in my mid-20s, and learning that people actually lived the way that i fantasized was a HUGE epiphany for me.

When i divorced my ex-husband at age 33 for non-BDSM reasons, it allowed me to go straight into 24/7 slavery - which i did, and have never looked back.

_____________________________

"My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure it out. What am I doing right?" ~Snoopy (Charles Schultz)

My blog is at http://takinghishand.wordpress.com

(in reply to Phoenix73Sir)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Tell your story... How did you discover you were ki... - 6/6/2010 7:41:13 PM   
georgeinca


Posts: 30
Joined: 8/2/2008
Status: offline 		I was bumped up from kindergarten to a grade 1/2 split class after a month. In that class were a cute blonde and a cute brunette. They would chase me around at recess. I had to run away, of course, it was de rigeur under The Boys' Code. But I'd let them catch me after a fair chase, at which point they'd tickle me and kiss my cheeks and I'd pretend to hate it.

Then, at night, in my insomniac way, I'd imagine them naked, bound, spread-eagled. Had no clue what I'd do from there, but hey, it was a start!

I was 5.

(in reply to UniqueRaven)
Profile   Post #: 72
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