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RE: Disappearing acts - 4/11/2006 2:58:50 PM   
BeingChewsie


Posts: 1633
Joined: 10/27/2005
Status: offline 		Yes. I have. I don't *bond* well. I don't get real attached to people(my owner being the exception to that rule), people come and go in my life and I barely notice. It isn't unusual for me to just dissapear and not talk to people for months on end. My family is used to it. I have been this way since I was a small child. I prefer to deal with people on my terms, when *I* want them around me...so sometimes I do dissapear. My owner is quite similiar. We laugh and often say we are like two scorpions, why we like each other( and do not sting one another) and nobody else(though he socializes a lot, as people contacts could mean money to him) who knows..but yes, I do dissapear.

(in reply to PenelopePitstop)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/12/2006 10:45:04 AM   
zebra


Posts: 64
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline 		Just this morning I mentioned to a friend that several times, when someone has said he loves my profile and I'm so smart and interesting and blah blah blah, and then he asks for and I send my photo.....goodbye, no word, just poof. It hurts, I admit it. But my friend wrote back and said when it happens to him he just assumes "there's been a tragic accident."

I loved that!

(in reply to PenelopePitstop)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/12/2006 11:17:23 AM   
MasterRenegade77


Posts: 1852
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Upstate N.Y. (Broome Co.)
Status: offline
I've had disappearences happen to Me in the past as well, I've tried to maintain a nuetral veneer in dealing with new prospects but not so much that I seemunattainable... I've had slaves appraoch Me on the internet then send Me pics after reading My profile (Pics There too) And just as I'm starting to get comfortable & think Maybe I've found one... BAM they're gone never to be heard from again, leaves Me thinkin' Whaddaflock??? After awhile you get used to it & realize that the internet just as in R/t is filled with so many diverse people & personalities that you're bound to run into those that have innumerable nueroses, psychoses & obsessions so you move on... Of course at first you think what'd I do or say that made them flee it can hurt if you let it, after awhile though you just move on... Try to draw a parallel with this old saying, "If you loan someone twenty dollars & never see them again it was prolly worth it"

(in reply to zebra)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/12/2006 12:11:47 PM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		I can honestly say I have never done a disappearing act on anyone---well ok there WAS that one little time in college that I made My mom go to the door and talk to a date because I was on My way out with another date---but the next day I did face My actions and told him I was very sorry, I was abducted by an alien life force and they replicated My cell composition--but I was back now and was he available tonite---
 
<Teasing people>... and I do not make light of what you are asking---mean people suck---but I have always been responsible for My actions, no matter how hard it was or is.
 
Chin up dear, martini?

< Message edited by MHOO314 -- 4/12/2006 12:12:08 PM >

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to PenelopePitstop)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/12/2006 12:19:23 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		Dearest Zebra,

I drive a little over 45 miles one way to work in the mornings and I can't begin to tell you all the times that I have seen someone laying in the ditch, valiantly but hoarsely uttering in their final desparate moments, the word, 'Zebra'.

Or was it 'Rosebud'.... I don't know, I was traveling at a pretty good clip.

Fuck 'em all except 6 of 'em and leave those for pallbearers.

LOL,
Ron  

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to zebra)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/12/2006 12:58:12 PM   
zebra


Posts: 64
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline 		I *knew* it!!! Either than or they were so dazzled by my beauty that, I don't know, their heads just exploded!

As far as I'm concerned, you can get rid of 5 of the 6 and leave one to sprinkle the ashes.

(OK, not really; just trying to show my appreciation.)

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/12/2006 8:18:03 PM   
PenelopePitstop


Posts: 254
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: UK
Status: offline 		:) Thank you: this goes to everyone who has 'confessed'. I mean that: Thank You. because from reading what you're saying, there is very little I don't relate to. Like I said, I believe there are reasons why people sometimes don't do what was planned.

The internet is a flawed method of getting to know people, of course. Computers DO break down (as do people). God: if someone stalked me I'd definitely disappear. And sometimes there is just no simple way to end a communication that needs to be ended.

I dont think that being in contact with someone gives you an automatic right to their consistency and reliability - although it IS nice. Also, I do see that it's really important to preserve one's anonymity and safety sometimes.

I have been tempted to do disappearing acts, but my conscience would never let me. I'm really tenuous and I hate unfinished business. the benefits of disappearing are pretty obvious, but the benefits of NOT disappearing can be pretty valuable. Explaining oneself out of a tricky situation is a much underrated skill...it also gets complex when you may have said something in the past you really didn't mean - it's really hard and really brave I think if you can face up to it.

If I could guarantee not to think about a situation again, I would probably be guilty of disappearing acts myself. But I would think about it, and although I might not be there in presence I would be there in spirit.


_____________________________

Wickedness is a myth created by good people to account for the curious attractiveness of others ~ Oscar Wilde

"You had me at Goodbye"

(in reply to zebra)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/13/2006 6:14:03 PM   
Takethiswaltz


Posts: 199
Joined: 3/13/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Or was it 'Rosebud'.... I don't know, I was traveling at a pretty good clip.

LOL,
Ron  


Ha ha!!


_____________________________

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in...

~Leonard Cohen~

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/13/2006 7:08:48 PM   
TakesItForU


Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2006
Status: offline 		You should know a lot about that Dianne.  You did that to me.  You said you wanted to meet on Wednesday or Thursday for a play scene.  To email you in the morning which I did but so far no response from that account or from collarme.  So I figure you are a flake and fake.  It makes sense that under your name the term "vanilla" applies.  But really please stop playing mind games here because you will develop a bad reputation amongst real lifestylers.   

(in reply to ladydianna63)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 12:17:25 AM   
FirmhandKY


Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TakesItForU

You should know a lot about that Dianne.  You did that to me.  You said you wanted to meet on Wednesday or Thursday for a play scene.  To email you in the morning which I did but so far no response from that account or from collarme.  So I figure you are a flake and fake.  It makes sense that under your name the term "vanilla" applies.  But really please stop playing mind games here because you will develop a bad reputation amongst real lifestylers.   


hmmm ... seems to me she is upfront, and admits her "failures".

You, on the otherhand, don't come across nearly as sympathetic - and perhaps that is the root of the issue?

FHky


_____________________________

Some people are just idiots.

(in reply to TakesItForU)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 12:51:15 AM   
TakesItForU


Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2006
Status: offline 		She did that to me AFTER she posted (morning)on the forum so she purposely deceived me into thinking that she was serious about meeting (we discussed this in the evening).  A clear example of a flake.  LOL, if she flaked out on five other subs you know that she isn't a good domme or one you can trust.  Imagine being strapped to the cross and blindfolded and she suddenly wants to disappear, leaving you standing there in captivity and no way to free yourself.  Maybe she will never return.  Who knows?  If she wasn't interested, then say no thanks but she did not.  She told me to email her in the morning and that she will decide if she could meet on a Wed or Thurs.  I am telling you that this "domme" isn't playing with a full deck. 

< Message edited by TakesItForU -- 4/14/2006 1:08:11 AM >

(in reply to FirmhandKY)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 1:17:08 AM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline 		Actually you bashing her again and again will make you look worse than her disapering on you.

(in reply to TakesItForU)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 12:39:10 PM   
Ceyx


Posts: 89
Joined: 8/23/2005
Status: offline 		It is indeed courageous to face up to something you've said or committed to in the past that's no longer true for you, knowing that to do so will be painful both for you and for the others involved.  I've never outright disappeared on anyone-- at least, I don't think I have-- but I've 'faded' on a few occasions.  Usually it's because I'm in a position where I'd have to tell them something that would deeply hurt their feelings and damage their self-esteem.  Is it kinder to leave that unsaid and be considered a jerk for disappearing, or is it better to level with them and leave them wiser, if perhaps much less happy with themselves?  I really don't know.

The hopeful thought is that one will simply blame the person who disappeared, rather than asking what one has done to deserve such treatment.  But that's a forlorn hope, I suppose.  Probably best to come clean.

(in reply to PenelopePitstop)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 1:40:10 PM   
TakesItForU


Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2006
Status: offline 		The best policy is to be honest even though it could possibly hurt the feelings of another person.  Perhaps it will enlighten that person about their behavior and make them change for the better.  But really disappearing on the person is very rude and very mean.  Kinda like a dead-beat dad or mother leaving the family in the middle of the night but to never to return.  Imagine how hurt the family would be, especially the little ones.

(in reply to Ceyx)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 2:03:40 PM   
littlebuzz


Posts: 1
Joined: 4/8/2006
Status: offline 		i do believe that my Dom did a disappearing act.  Have not seen Him in weeks and He doesn't call or email as He did before.  When He does write He insists He is busy and that i do belong to Him and He is not interested in any other subs, but who really knows?

(in reply to TakesItForU)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 2:43:49 PM   
iliveforu


Posts: 1
Joined: 2/25/2006
Status: offline 		Oh my gosh ! A truce would be nice....playing well with others is a skill...we learn it as children......as far as disappearing acts.......heck I would rather hear..."I made a mistake" or "I meet another" or the truth...and yes even if it hurts(this can be done gently believe it or not) then a "disappearing act" even the best self esteem can have a problem with that.
 
 
"dont sweat the small stuff and its all small stuff"

(in reply to littlebuzz)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 7:23:16 PM   
TakesItForU


Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2006
Status: offline 		Please don't take that kind of abuse or neglect if you are truly unhappy.  So many other good dominants out there for you. 

(in reply to littlebuzz)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 7:25:38 PM   
TakesItForU


Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2006
Status: offline 		I agree.  I just don't understand why people do that.  Are they afraid to explain themselves.  If so, then perhaps they are not really dominant at all and lack the confidence to present their ideas and opinions to the submissive.  It's unbecoming of a dominant not to take care of their property or their potential property. 

< Message edited by TakesItForU -- 4/14/2006 7:27:23 PM >

(in reply to iliveforu)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/14/2006 8:57:13 PM   
FirmhandKY


Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TakesItForU

I agree.  I just don't understand why people do that.  Are they afraid to explain themselves.  If so, then perhaps they are not really dominant at all and lack the confidence to present their ideas and opinions to the submissive.  It's unbecoming of a dominant not to take care of their property or their potential property. 


Yeah, and sometimes descretion is the better part of valor.

Often times, the best course of action to take with people who won't take "no" for an answer is to simply disappear.

I'm starting to feel more and more sympathy for Dianne.

FHky


_____________________________

Some people are just idiots.

(in reply to TakesItForU)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Disappearing acts - 4/15/2006 8:35:16 AM   
TakesItForU


Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2006
Status: offline 		Oh I can take no for an answer and if I cannot,  then she can always block me and the matter is done and over with.  You really don't have all the information here when you take her side.  Either she is feeding you erroneous information or you are making the assumptions that a complaining male submissive is automatically at fault and that the domme is some kind of damsel in distress.  In either case, you are barking  up or should I say biting on the wrong tree.  I can show you all of our email correspondences and you will see that she is a major flake and probably not a real domme.  Bottom line:  she screwed up period.  And I am glad I don't have to serve Her.  She doesn't deserve service at all.

(in reply to FirmhandKY)
Profile   Post #: 40
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