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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 4:40:50 AM

shewontsayplease

Posts: 4
Joined: 4/9/2006
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Err I want to apologize because my post came off very disrespectful. I did not mean for it to be so.

(in reply to swtnsparkling)

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 4:44:34 AM

SirCumsSlut

Posts: 433
Joined: 4/30/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NJSubGirl

First of all I want to thank each and everone one of you for taking time out to respond to my post. As I posted I am new to this... DO i completely know the whole slave/master relationship? No i do not... Never said i did... but it has intrigued me my whole life... I have found someone that has introduced me to this, which is rare, and willing to teach me and Im willing to be taught. It is a shame he has a g/f... And to all that asked, No she does not know... She is NOT into the whole scene. And to all that think Im looking for him to leave his g/f... NO I am not thinking that either. Lets just say I have a very strong interior where I can have a sexual relation without getting my heart involved. IM NOT promising that this will NOT happen... but that is NOT my intent at all!
As one posted, I am going to take from this and grow. I am now consumed with the role that I am in... wether it be a sub or a slave, Im still not sure.... Like I said... Im new to this.
Ive never been so sexually free ... And trust me, Im a very sexual person! I wish it wasnt this way that he has a girl, but Im addicted to the sexual things we do and I dont know where else to find it.
I want you all to think back to the first time you experienced all this...
I dont know about you... but this has been the most amazing two weeks of my life!
Im sorry if i have upset some people with my situation...
I just needed some advice
OH and
whats vanilla mean??? lol

Have also been in your shoes as the "other woman" in the vanilla world..........I knew he would never truly leave his wife, but I hoped he would..........and guess what??? BAM he turned around and not only cheated and lied to his wife, but to me as well........that was the end...........

No judgement, just some friendly advice.............Be prepared when she finds out........cause you will be the one she blames.......also be prepared for him to do to you what he has done to her........again a cheater and liar will "usually" continue to follow those paths no matter who they are because they LIVE for the game. Right now this situation may not be a problem for you, but later down the road it just may become a BIG PROBLEM in regards to you finding another to fulfill that desire that you have....

Again trust and honesty are a staple in any lifestyle

_____________________________

Peace
His slut

"Your firm hand and compassionate heart are what guide me in my journey....I am Yours, Sir" His slut

(in reply to NJSubGirl)

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 4:47:15 AM

swtnsparkling

Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

I understand your pain

If you really did understand her pain, why on earth would you be a party to possibly inflicting the same pain on another?
Oooh right silly me I had forgotten for a second- the SEX is great

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Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace

A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 5:11:38 AM

bklynbbw

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Joined: 10/19/2005
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Hello all, I usually just listen and learn from you all. but I just had to say something on this one.

you say you "know her pain"....the only way to know is to have lived through it at some point....anyone who has, myself included, would make sure to not do it again.    Its tooooo painful.

and two weeks into this and there is a master? I've been into this for over a year and while I have met many wonderful people both Master/Dom and sub, I have yet to meet someone I trust enough to even play with, much less call Master.    Im scared for you. I wish you the best though.

just my thoughts....<<smile>>

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 7:04:09 AM

babyblues

Posts: 80
Joined: 8/10/2005
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Amayos, i believe You are saying that NJ is caught up in that first thrill of discovering herself and that when that passion cools a bit she will begin her true journey into submission....i suppose we all start somewhere....i won't judge her - although i do feel sorry for the gf - and i hope NJ is protecting herself, both physically and emotionally....

perhaps i was bothered by the seemingly casual use of the terms Master and slave....slavery involves so much more than "He comes over a nite and I do as he says! "....and "Master" is a name i hold in such awe, how could anyone have a "Master" in just 2 weeks? it all seems a little flippant to me....

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 8:06:21 AM

NJSubGirl

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I have thrown around the words lightly...
I guess the words i use just describe what im trying to convey...
Your right.. he's not my master or yet am i his slave... still learning.

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 9:19:42 PM

acctonthelook

Posts: 245
Joined: 3/28/2006
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Thank you for at least saying you understood, though you have not experienced it in 2 weeks. I'm hoping you at least see that pain I still deal with (meaning my self respect).

I will not 'play' again. Sex is easy...love, trust, honor, mutual respect, and the D/s dynamic is not something to take lightly. Someday you may just find that out with a Dom that will test every limit and push you maybe too far.

Good Luck, your willingness to see all sides is showing me that you do have a heart, but will you have a heart for the GF and will your heart really grow if you continue? Just a thought.

Be Safe! ((( Hug )))

quote:

ORIGINAL: NJSubGirl

thank you for your post.. and im sorry you went thru that :(

I understand your pain

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 9:36:48 PM

NJSubGirl

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acctonthelook..

i admire you :)

ty for the kind words....

and i have taken all of your advice in stride....
your a beautiful being.. TY for being "real"

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/12/2006 11:00:38 PM

acctonthelook

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/13/2006 6:06:03 PM

CrappyDom

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From: Sacramento
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Lying cheating pricks are pretty easy to find and if he is lying and cheating on her, he is lying and cheating on himself which means he doesn't make real decisions in the best interest of those around him.

If it was someone who had a wife with some crippling disease and he made a hard choice to stay with her but meet some needs elsewhere that is a different story and one I can have sympathy with.

He is shacking up with one bimbo and fucking another, sorry, that is not the basis for much in my opinion.

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/13/2006 6:18:20 PM

NJSubGirl

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No need for name calling now... we are all adults here...
Or are we?

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/13/2006 6:33:18 PM

CrappyDom

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From: Sacramento
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Oh, excuse me...

The individual who has multiple partners he keeps in the dark about his sexual activities..

&

The individual who chooses partners who have multiple "monogamous" relationships.

Is that better? I mean I would want to actually have standards or anything, not in our precious "community" here...

(in reply to NJSubGirl)

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/13/2006 8:14:37 PM

mathiasdomm

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NJ,

As a reformed cheat (there were some high times before I realized that Master was a better title than sweetheart), I can tell you that the advice given by so many here "a liar will lie to anyone, and eventually anyone will be you" is dead on accurate. In my experience, it's not a physical need but a psychological need for conquest, adventure, and yeah, for the hell of doing something dirty. After a while, you'll be the one that doesn't matter so much. But it sounds like you're prepared for all that.

Something you may not be prepared for: Once I was in the middle of an affair at the appointed place and time and my girlfriend walked in with a knife (I have a terrible fear of being stabbed). Things weren't pretty. Of course, I'm from Mississippi and it's a different sort of thing here. Maybe that won't happen in New Jersey, but maybe it will. Are you prepared for that?
-m

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/13/2006 8:31:43 PM

TemptingNviceSub

Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
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The OP is lost in a case of major "sub frenzy"..she is lost to the adrenalin high of it all...Any thoughts ,worries,concerns for herself or anyone else are pushed aside for the continuing fix that she needs and craves.She fools herself into thinking this will be ok for the moment that she has a handle on it.She politely smiles and nods her acceptance of any criticism being dished out, showing to the forum that she is fully under control...I wish this OP well...she will need it when she crashes and burns..and she has to find herself in the ashes of her own destruction..Hopefully she will come out the better and wiser for it..My wish for the OP?..is that the payment she will pay does not far exceed the debt...be well Tempting

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/14/2006 7:41:43 AM

babyblues

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Joined: 8/10/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

Oh, excuse me...

The individual who has multiple partners he keeps in the dark about his sexual activities..

&

The individual who chooses partners who have multiple "monogamous" relationships.

laughing...i think i like you Crappy....

(in reply to CrappyDom)

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Post #: 75

RE: Being my masters secret - 4/14/2006 7:45:28 AM

SirCumsSlut

Posts: 433
Joined: 4/30/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mathiasdomm

NJ,

As a reformed cheat (there were some high times before I realized that Master was a better title than sweetheart), I can tell you that the advice given by so many here "a liar will lie to anyone, and eventually anyone will be you" is dead on accurate. In my experience, it's not a physical need but a psychological need for conquest, adventure, and yeah, for the hell of doing something dirty. After a while, you'll be the one that doesn't matter so much. But it sounds like you're prepared for all that.

Something you may not be prepared for: Once I was in the middle of an affair at the appointed place and time and my girlfriend walked in with a knife (I have a terrible fear of being stabbed). Things weren't pretty. Of course, I'm from Mississippi and it's a different sort of thing here. Maybe that won't happen in New Jersey, but maybe it will. Are you prepared for that?
-m

No they pull guns...........

_____________________________

Peace
His slut

"Your firm hand and compassionate heart are what guide me in my journey....I am Yours, Sir" His slut

(in reply to mathiasdomm)

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/14/2006 8:00:24 AM

truesub4u

Posts: 2949
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Back in the Late 80's I dated a married man for like 18 months. Friends with benifits so to speak. Never met the wife, told him I didn't want to. If I ever did, it would be over between us. I was still young enough to believe if I didn't know her, or what she even looked like, I was not hurting anyone. Yeah I know, stupid thoughts, but like I said, I was still young and dumb at that time in my life. But not young and dumb enough to know that what ended our affair, was when he said he was leaving his wife and wanted to marry me. I busted out laughing. Said no damn way in hell. You lied and cheated on your wife, who are you going to lie and cheat on me with. Our relationship didn't last 2 weeks after that. And in all that time, I spent ever night alone. Holidays with family but yet still alone. I went to bed alone, woke up alone. After that affair.... I said never again... and i've stuck to that. If i've found out someone was married ..... I tell them straight up ...... nothing would develope.

I'll not judge you on your choice, can't, been there, done that. All I can say, is hope you quickly recover from the drop that happens when it's done. No matter who drops, you or him. The drop will happen. And if you do end up with him, and you start thinking he's cheating, all you can do is remember he did it before, and so there's no reason to get pist. Just figure out how you're going to handle it. And then deal with it. Either by living with it, or leaving it. I'm not saying once a cheat always a cheat. I'm a true believer if he's happy at home, he won't stray. It's all on you.. and him... not what everyone else thinks or says.

Good luck to you.

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/14/2006 9:06:20 AM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

Lying cheating pricks are pretty easy to find and if he is lying and cheating on her, he is lying and cheating on himself which means he doesn't make real decisions in the best interest of those around him.

If it was someone who had a wife with some crippling disease and he made a hard choice to stay with her but meet some needs elsewhere that is a different story and one I can have sympathy with.

He is shacking up with one bimbo and fucking another, sorry, that is not the basis for much in my opinion.

It is interesting how one can make assumptions of intelligence and worth about another without even knowing them. The opening poster is correct; generalizations, name calling and insults do nothing in the way of helping people here, other than fostering child-like dialog. Further, I believe the opening poster has made it quite clear by now that she is fully self-aware, open-minded and receptive to advice, so long as that advice is expressed intelligently. You are going off on a skewed moral rant that is burdened with judgment and transference. You are picking a fight, and it's obvious.

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/14/2006 9:21:47 AM

CrappyDom

Posts: 1883
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Intelligence? Hmmm, nowhere in my post did I mention it.

Child-like dialog? Interesting choice of words. Children act without consideration of others. Teaching them to consider others is one of the first things we teach them, some it seems, never learn that lesson.

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RE: Being my masters secret - 4/14/2006 10:01:26 AM

CanadianGuy

Posts: 219
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One thing I'd like to point out is that when we're talking about "married" we should mentally replace that with "in a committed relationship". I don't think there's anything significant about a legal document that turns a marriage into anything more important than a deeply loving collar relationship, or two people who love each other and are devoted to each other, for the purpose of this discussion. I myself am in the process of separation and eventual divorce. I'm still married, I still wear that ring. But my submissive has 100% of my heart and we connect in a way that I've never felt before. My "wife" would stab me in the face if she knew I was "cheating". My girl wants to place no restrictions on me. Yet who am I loyal and committed to? The one who doesn't require that of me. My point is that when people say "marriage" in this discussion, don't think white dress, flower toss, cake smashed on your face and pictures.

For the record, I may not give much power to the concept of a ring or legal document, but I would never lie to or cheat on my submissive. "Once a cheat always a cheat" - disagreed!

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom
Intelligence? Hmmm, nowhere in my post did I mention it.

amayos may have been referring to your term bimbo which is defined by wikipedia as "a stupid, pliable woman" and "is sometimes interpreted as the backronym Body Impressive, Brain Optional".

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