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newflowers -> RE: This lifestyle mixed into home life (9/19/2004 5:48:06 PM)
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I too am a single mom with girls ages 12 and 19 - the 19 year old knows in a general way of my interests as she read the Gloria Brame book on my self and asked if I was interested in such things and I told her yes. The little one knows not so much, but as she is netiher blind nor deaf, and we use the same computer, she has asked. I told her that different people like and are attracted to different things. It is not an issue of weird or normal, but differnt needs. This she understood and is fine. And so I wear what I want and, though I am discrete, I am not secretive. My children have long known of respect, tolerance, and acceptance for themselves and others.
It is simply not a problem. There are times when we talk and times when we do not.
Ultimately, I am the mom not subject to the approval of my girls because I am the grown up. But this applies in many situations within our family life. When I had a partner, the girls treated him with the kindness and respect I expect from them for all guests and visitors.
Certainly I can see in the future when I have a partner again that, as they are not the little children they were before, they may question and comment more, and I am fine with that. They know still, regardless of agreement and understanding, that the watch words are respect, accpetance, and tolerance - I have taught them so, I show it to them, to their friends, and they do so to me. There are aspects of my life that are private and some that are not - they know this. And, in the end, I have "paid the cost to be the boss" and this works for us.
My advice is teach your children to be respectful, tolerant, and accepting of others who are different - I'm sure you already have otherwise you'd not be so worried about their reactions. Talk about basic and expand when they ask. You get to be the mom and are entitled to a private life that does not include your children. Enjoy yourself.
newflowers
newflowers
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