Outed as a Switch

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

Outed as a Switch

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Switch >> Outed as a Switch

Page: [1]

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Outed as a Switch - 4/17/2006 9:18:51 PM

Posts: 1733
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline

         Interesting moment down at the lecture on electrical play a week or so ago. We were sitting in the courtyard, feeding our nicotine monsters right near the vendors, and we found ourselves 'found out.'

        The guy who teaches rope play wanted to show my wife a nifty new trick for displaying the family jewels and assumed she was the Dominant. The toymaker was right next to him and is well aware (to his profit) of my "no marks, no fun" philosophy and assumed I was Dom. We just 'fessed up to being switches.

         Anybody else had similar moments when people came face to face with your switchy tendencies?

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/18/2006 12:21:27 AM

Posts: 1044
Joined: 4/5/2006
Status: offline

Can't say I've ever been in this situation, but then again, still trying to figure out what ways inside my head make me a switch... I do get confused for being the lady of the house on the phone if I've just woken up, though...

Does that count? LOL

_____________________________

Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children.

Murderer?! Murderer! Let me tell you something about murder. It's fun; it's easy; you gonna learn ALL about it. - Tin Tin

Can you be more amusing?

(in reply to WyrdRich)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/18/2006 6:14:19 AM

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

At a fem dom/male sub centered munch I go to, there was this truly braindead/uncivilized woman there who saw me snuggling at the table with my local partner and asked "Who's dom and who's sub?" I just giggled and said "Yes."

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to WyrdRich)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/18/2006 6:21:34 AM

Posts: 1733
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline

Well, "the Psychology of BDSM" shows up as a topic for the lectures fairly regularly but for some reason those are always the weekends that life gets in the way. I doubt switches would be on the lesson plan anyway.

From what I've seen, the pop psych model of Doms as people frustrated by a lack of power in day to day life and subs as powerful people who need to release control is pretty much crap anyway. I just go with what feels right to me and I hit the lottery finding a woman whose tastes run right along the same track.

(in reply to Dustyn)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/18/2006 6:31:39 AM

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: WyrdRich

I just go with what feels right to me and I hit the lottery finding a woman whose tastes run right along the same track.

I feel this same way about my situation/lifestyle. I do what feels right to me and my man feels the same way. As long as we are happy why should anyone else care?

~Lashra

(in reply to WyrdRich)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/18/2006 4:13:43 PM

Posts: 1066
Joined: 4/4/2006
Status: offline

It is great finding that person who you can connect with in this lifestyle.

That is one thing I like about being a switch. Keeps them guessing!

~poe

_____________________________

~poe

I'm mad, you're mad, we're all mad here, it's the fad for many a year, if you think we're crazy my dear, you're right cause I'M mad, YOU'RE mad, we're ALL mad here! - Mad Hatter

(in reply to WyrdRich)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/18/2006 4:59:26 PM

Posts: 1733
Joined: 1/3/2005
Status: offline

It's also a great way to enforce the limits; Switches Get Even!

(in reply to MsPoetress)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/18/2006 5:11:14 PM

Posts: 1013
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

I am pretty open about it if asked (and I am asked...a lot) so I guess I have never been "found out."

Although once I was wearing a fem-dom type patent leather fetish dress while I was topping a submissive man, but you could see cutting/scratching marks all up my back and bruises on my arm. A few people were watching and I heard an acquaintance of mine say to someone I didn't know, "She's a switch." So I assumed he was trying to figure it all out.

(in reply to WyrdRich)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/24/2006 3:24:53 PM

Posts: 8
Joined: 4/1/2006
Status: offline

I'm pretty open about this when asked. Although at the munch I attend no one has ever asked, I've only ever been asked online and by friends. I have no idea what impression my fellow munch-ers have. it would be interesting to know.....

(in reply to WyrdRich)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/24/2006 3:46:15 PM

Posts: 90
Joined: 4/20/2006
From: Memphis
Status: offline

well while we switch on occasion or rather im allowed to top,till i get my boy. Our roles,when we go out or to any even the roles are extremly clear. even if its a switchy day, we keep the lines clean but thats just a personle thing i supose. so never realy had any outings, or mistaken identitys, when were at some sort of event, even if im allowed to topor in dom mode im always clearly hers.*smiles* works for me.

_____________________________

Alpha in my Mistress's house, bound to her by collar and wedding band.

(in reply to Lionesss)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 4/27/2006 7:20:46 PM

Posts: 87
Joined: 4/4/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

At a fem dom/male sub centered munch I go to, there was this truly braindead/uncivilized woman there who saw me snuggling at the table with my local partner and asked "Who's dom and who's sub?" I just giggled and said "Yes."

Awesome.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 7/11/2006 5:53:05 PM

yumyi

Posts: 30
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline

I was at a large event that my (Top) primary partner was organizing. He was busy the whole night (and I was busy for a lot of the night helping him) but I had some time to play, and a willing partner who I'd played with before a number of times. I was wearing a very tight skirt, and corset, and the room was hot, so after my bottom stripped down to her thong, I kicked off the shoes and did the same.

I was in the middle of using a pair of finger-floggers on her, and my Top came up and started flogging me lightly.

It was perhaps one of the oddest scenes I've ever been a part of. Afterwards, someone who has only known me as a submissive came up and said "you're the oddest submissive I know..."

*chuckles*

(in reply to SweetPosession)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 7/12/2006 5:10:50 AM

Posts: 1
Joined: 7/12/2006
Status: offline

I love to switch!

(in reply to WyrdRich)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 7/13/2006 4:32:59 AM

Posts: 360
Joined: 7/2/2006
Status: offline

that sounds like fun, I need to try getting flogged while flogging. It would make my sadomasochistic side happy...wait that would be both. yay me!

(in reply to yumyi)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 8/24/2006 3:38:09 AM

Posts: 16
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline

Personally, (and you have to know before-hand I'm a triple Leo), um, personally I made it clear I was a play-space bisexual switch who just also happened to be a massage therapist in RL, when I first started becoming active within the Scene. When asked to pigeon-hole myself, I tend to describe it as "Hedonist". Of course, then I have to explain what I mean by that, but it's a wonderful icebreaker.

How wonderful you should be able to find another who not only understands your kink but also appreciates it!

-What doesn't kill us makes us stranger

(in reply to shadevarr)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 8/24/2006 6:20:23 AM

Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline

I am slightly amused that in My local scene there are several Switches, but most of them will only top in public. They will sub only in private. They seem to think it will somehow harm their status or their aura if they are seen "taking it". That definitely doesn't apply to M/me ... I don't mind topping or bottoming! Interestingly, subs I have played with are invariably awed to know I also take it ... especially when they are squawking after < 100 paddle strokes and I tell them that my maximum is 250! Master is a BIG Man too, they KNOW He would pack more of a wallop than I can! The sub side of me is definitely more exhibitionist, and loves being spanked publicly, but I am equally comfortable being on the other end of the paddle or flogger! My ideal situation would be to have my wonderful Master AND a wonderful live-in sub/slave, so both sides of M/me can be equally catered for and fulfilled. Locals have coined a new term for M/me ... no longer Switch ... now Duality!

Now, i'm off to talk to Master about that idea of being flogged while flogging a sub ... sounds good ... can it be done with spanking? Hmmm one to try!

Mistress Jay aka violet[A]

_____________________________

Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

(in reply to RobertMaddox)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 8/24/2006 7:26:42 AM

Posts: 140
Joined: 8/8/2006
Status: offline

I'm so surprised by the number of people who still think 'switch' is a bad word. Also Dominants who are so scared that someone will see them as less than Dominant if they do anything in public that could be remotely seen as submissive. It just doesn't seem too Dominant to me to care so much about what others think of you. It's like they are so unsure of their own Dominance that they have to be super careful to protect it.

So what if you enjoy aspects of top and bottom....I certainly do, and I don't think it takes anything away from my Dominance.

(in reply to MaamJay)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 8/24/2006 9:11:45 AM

Posts: 817
Joined: 1/1/2006
Status: offline

quote:

that sounds like fun, I need to try getting flogged while flogging. It would make my sadomasochistic side happy...wait that would be both. yay me!

I've done that. My friends and I did it as a joke. We were all flogging each other and having great fun and it sort of turned into a conga line. I was topping Mike and my friend Brandyn comes up behind me. I look over my shoulder once and then back at Mike. Who was I to complain? Very interesting sensation, but I haven't experienced it in a severe scene, just in a joking sense.

I mention I am a sadomasochist all the time. A couple of people don't understand how that can also exist with Dominance, but it does.

< Message edited by Slipstreme -- 8/24/2006 9:12:29 AM >

_____________________________

Living the Dichotomy

Painslut? How about "Endorphin Junkie"?

For information about "the furry thing" please check out my profile journal entry for: 1/17/2006

Alpha of a leather family of four. Master to the slave z.

(in reply to MzTlaz)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 8/25/2006 3:37:06 PM

Posts: 1004
Joined: 7/31/2006
Status: offline

I can be a bottom, but I'd rather top. I enjoy playing the role of Dom.
I can be submissive for short periods of time. Most females I've encountered
in the past were looking for someone who would always be a top, and would
always be super dominant. I don't know how to describe myself. I think
a lot of females fear they will end up with a submissive bottom or the guy
is not really into bdsm, and is just claiming he like bdsm to get laid.

(in reply to Slipstreme)

RE: Outed as a Switch - 8/25/2006 7:50:01 PM

Posts: 137
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline

at my fave local club ive turned up one week with a switch freind of mine with him at the end of my leash taking him around on all fours and flogging him and the very next meeting we were the other way around much to the confusion of everyone there so now whenever we are there together we get asked whos in which role,i guess we both like subbing so much but when theres noone to top we just make do by being the top ourselves

(in reply to WhipTheHip)

Page: [1]

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Switch >> Outed as a Switch

Page: [1]

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

0.104