SusanofO
Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005 Status: offline
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I can see instances (like in a humiliation context mentioned by feastie, for example) where it might be construed as "failure" by outsiders looking in, or maybe even by either partner (if communication wasn't all that great between the two, for whatever reason )....but that may be useful as far as teaching something a partner wants the other to learn. I can see that a slave, or even a submissive might not fully realize the desired end result of the Master or Dom at the time. I think the basic issue here may well be how much trust is being perceived as having to be (or has been) earned by either person. If one has felt ''let down" by another I'd hope they'd discuss it if they did feel that had happened. Outside of instances that teach something - with a constructive end result intended (if not always known by the submissive or slave), I'd have to question why anyone would want their slave to fail *(but am aware that people exist who simply do not have another's best interests at heart or are not "on the same page" . Maybe those people have discovered this via communication or lack of it, too). I see no no shame in being very willing yet still maybe having one's heart broken. Trust can erode slowly over time as much as it can be built, or re-built though, I think. Hopefully, there's a flow of it going on between two (or more) people. Sometimes, yes - there actually is a "point of no return" (but even in that case, it's been construed that way by one or both people all the same). In that case, I imagine it can sometimes be difficult to trust again. I sees overall goal in D/s as enhancement of the other. Discovering and wanting to draw out and enhance their enjoyment of their power (of a Master or Dom) and enable what is construed as beautiful by them in a submissive or slave to be enhanced by them too - as far as their own desires and the submissive's or slave's good qualities. How could anyone do that if they "want their slave to fail"? If someone really wants to please someone else, from the bottom of their heart, how could they make them fail? If they were understanding and you gave your very best? I don't think they could. Maybe simply else has been disappointed someone or not lived up to standards they've set (or maybe their own) for whatever reason. Maybe next time will be easier or the person(s) in question will do things differently to become "better" at some activity or the way they approach it. Maybe eventually two people have a 'parting of the ways' if they cannot work things out so that the Dom or Master is pleased. But in any of those cases - If you give or gave your very best you are not a failure. - SusanofO
< Message edited by SusanofO -- 4/19/2006 7:48:13 AM >
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"Hope is the thing with feathers, That perches in the soul, And sings the tune without the words, And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson
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